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[KingBacon]

This is the essence of dwarf fortress boiled down to one image. Ineffable confusion and utter ridiculousness.

[Button]

Oh my gosh you are my new favorite.

I have a forgotten beast silk farm. The bait is a chained up Mountain Gnome child. The webber is Strabo - "A great one-eyed newt. It has a broad shell and it has a gaunt appearance. Its periwinkle skin is rough and cracked. Beware its webs!" It is standing on a Mountain Gnome child skeleton.

If you're not familiar with the concept of a FB silk farm, the relevant details are that the bait is chained up on one side of a fortification, and the FB is lured to the other side of it (that's where the skeletons came from). Then you raise a bridge behind the FB to trap it. It flings silk at the bait through the fortification, which you can later collect for making into clothing .

[SkyRender]

I have a forgotten beast silk farm. The bait is a chained up Mountain Gnome child. The webber is Strabo

 Funny, I would've expected that creature to be a barrel-chested dragon with a soft spot for fairy creatures.

 (If you don't get it, you probably haven't read much Terry Brooks.)

[TripJack]

this paintsdwarfship here is of the finest quality

carry on

[Grey Goo]

Uh.. I may have gotten something minor to draw from arena testing. Tried testing custom creatures and weapons. First 100 dwarves with guns against one dragon just to ensure it got enough killing power. Dwarves were annihilated in one turn after they all missed. Okay, straight to next phase but with 100 dragon instead. There was two other creatures, eldritch abominations. One was mass of arms. Other was mass of mouths. They got dragon piled. Not died, just piled so hard that they were complety unable to act at all...

[KingBacon]

I just had goblin siege and necromancer siege show up. I just imagined the leaders arguing over who will sack my fortress.

The problem resolved itself.

[Charlylimph]

My current fortress has about five or six adult miners and about twenty children miners as well. Many of the adults are missing hands and one is missing both arm and leg on the left side ... I feel slightly guilty.

[Lord_lemonpie]

I once had a fortress on a savannah, and got a hunter migrant. I wasn't paying attention, so my hunter started hunting elephants. The whole herd (5 elephants)raged and began attacking the poor fellow. I didn't want to lose him, so i sent in 3 novice axedwarfs, one carrying a baby. By the time they arrived the hunter had killed one elephant. They fought for quite a while, but in the end all adult dwarfs had been killed by the only male elephant Febnavush (arrowblood), all female elephants had died, and the little dwarven girl had grown to become a Dwarven Child. When her mother got killed, she tried to flee, but Febnavush was faster. She instantly brained him.

PS: i absolutely love your art

[☼!!Troll Fur Sock!!☼]

One of my hunters was ambushed by a female birdman (I don't recall what type of bird that was... Whatever.) with only one bolt left. What he did? Tried to shoot, but missed. Then he charged, somehow making her fall over... /mid-air/... And then started shaking her by the tongue untill she went unconscious. And then he cancelled hunt because no ammo.

Some time later that bird got caught in one of my cage traps. Guess how? By running after the same dwarf who was now civilian and didn't try to fight back.
I'm thinking about placing that cage in his room as a thropy.

EDIT: Oh derp. /s instead of /i.

[WoobMonkey]

In a recent fort, a 12-yr-old, carrying a large andesite stone, managed to set himself on fire (I was playing with some lava at the time).  And proceeded to, ecstatically mind you, carry that lump of rock halfway across the fortress before finally melting away.

Seriously, the kid burned his way past nearly all of my other dorfs, presumably singing a merry tune, for nearly a week.  And nobody else seemed to care, or even notice.  Having seen the rest of this <<*thread*>>, I'm sure you can come up with the essence of the hilarity of the situation.

For reals, though - awesome work.  Especially the wounded kitten.

[IronTomato]

One of my rather skilled fisherman was just killed by a salmon, after having been pulled into the water.

You know what you need to do.

[PDF urist master]

you remind me of GoombaGeek. except these are well drawn.

enough of that.

a human twisted a great axe into a kobold's left lower arm. i don't even know how that's possible.

[Aslandus]

A goblin swordmaster got into my fortress and killed about half my dwarves before I got her caught in a cage. I just kept imagining her, covered in blood, saluting her goblin general from across the retracted bridge with a pile of dwarf corpses behind her

[uber pye]

a buff husk bunny

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[BeruangSarkis]

Thanks for all the support, gents!

Well, time to get to work on doing all these scenes.