Bay 12 Games Forum

Dwarf Fortress => DF Dwarf Mode Discussion => Topic started by: Kietharr on August 05, 2010, 08:10:43 am

Title: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Kietharr on August 05, 2010, 08:10:43 am
I just got this:

Kobuk Dorenatzul Ranger cancels Clean Self: Area inaccessible.

Must be one fat ranger.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: C0nscript on August 05, 2010, 08:27:34 am
Urist McDwarf cancels store item in stockpile: Too insane
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Ceaser on August 05, 2010, 08:30:43 am
Kobuk Dorenatzul Ranger cancels Clean Self: Area inaccessible.

Not to be a dick but everyone who has made soap has seen that message by now.        http://www.bay12games.com/dwarves/mantisbt/view.php?id=1023
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: RemusShepherd on August 05, 2010, 09:07:20 am
Urist McMiner cancels attend party:  Floor Space not available.

I'm still trying to figure out how that one happened.  I think that because he was a miner, he was digging channels, and happened to block his own path back to the meeting hall for a second.  I'm pretty sure that in the hall itself there is plenty of floor space for dancing.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Erotic Bootlace on August 05, 2010, 09:16:30 am
About 20 messages at once of "Ulrist McPartygoer cancels Attend Party: Unconcious"

Must have been one hell of a party :D

(Caused a cave in in my statue garden ;) )
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: katyrnyn on August 05, 2010, 09:27:15 am
"The Elf Hunter Aye RandomTreeHugger has arrived!"

My first thought: "Is that anything like a vampire hunter?"  I was so hoping she was going to go after the Elf infestation in my Trade Depot, like some sort of "Aye, The Elf Slayer" type, tossing wooden stakes into their hearts and whatnot.  Instead she went to see my mayor....  Such a disappointment.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Biag on August 05, 2010, 12:23:24 pm
"The Elf Hunter Aye RandomTreeHugger has arrived!"

My first thought: "Is that anything like a vampire hunter?"  I was so hoping she was going to go after the Elf infestation in my Trade Depot, like some sort of "Aye, The Elf Slayer" type, tossing wooden stakes into their hearts and whatnot.  Instead she went to see my mayor....  Such a disappointment.

Aye: "ARE YOU AN ELF?"
Urist McMayor: "Ach, dinnae insult me, ye daft woman! Be it not clear that I be a proud dwarf? Perhaps ye cannae see from ye'r grossly excessive height, eh?"
Aye: "I AM AYE, THE ELF HUNTER. I HAVE COME TO SPEAK TO YOU ABOUT THOSE WHO OCCUPY YOUR TRADE DEPOT."
Urist McMayor: "Well tha's good news then! I've been tryin' to figger out how t' get rid o' the pests, but-"
Aye: "THEY CARRY AN ABUNDANCE OF CLOTH. PERHAPS YOU WOULD BE WILLING TO GIVE THEM VALUABLE ARMOR FOR IT."
Urist McMayor: "Wait, what?"
Aye: "AND STOP CUTTING DOWN THE POOR TREES!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Toast024 on August 05, 2010, 12:29:57 pm
(http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/3699/dwarfman.png)
I was like "OH CRAP! ITS A FARMER DWARF TITAN! HE IS GOING TO HOE US TO DEATH! I MUST BEWARE HIS DEADLY CABBAGE!" Then he wandered around not doing anything for a while, and eventually just casually walked away.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Ethereal.Frog on August 05, 2010, 12:41:16 pm
I was like "OH CRAP! ITS A FARMER DWARF TITAN! HE IS GOING TO HOE US TO DEATH! I MUST BEWARE HIS DEADLY CABBAGE!" Then he wandered around not doing anything for a while, and eventually just casually walked away.

How the hell...?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Heavenfall on August 05, 2010, 01:22:09 pm
I love dwarves who stop partying to go get a drink. That's some badass party-dwarf there.

I've also seen a "cancels rest: too injured" once or twice. If you can't even pass out, you're in pretty bad shape.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: denito on August 05, 2010, 01:28:14 pm
This:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I constructed a (water) pool building over a volcano to create obsidian on the surface of the volcano.  When I set the zone for it as a pond to fill with buckets, I must have also accidently marked it as a fishing hole, and unbeknownst to me the dwarves were trying to fish from it.  Before I figured this out, I wtf'ed for a moment when I saw the message:

"There is nothing to catch in the volcano."
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: NW_Kohaku on August 05, 2010, 01:41:27 pm
The Steelhead Battalion (http://www.phobe.com/sfi/steelhead.html) will be quite dissapointed to hear that they can't catch any Three-mawed Magma Mackerals...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: theqmann on August 05, 2010, 01:42:29 pm
"The pig tail fiber cloth tunic has lodged firmly in the wound."  Apparently a forest Titan ripped the shirt off the back of my woodcutter dwarf and proceeded to beat 3 dwarves to death with.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Johuotar on August 05, 2010, 04:04:34 pm
I was like "OH CRAP! ITS A FARMER DWARF TITAN! HE IS GOING TO HOE US TO DEATH! I MUST BEWARE HIS DEADLY CABBAGE!" Then he wandered around not doing anything for a while, and eventually just casually walked away.

How the hell...?
So. Totally. Sigged.  :P
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Lord Darkstar on August 05, 2010, 05:22:20 pm
Urist McMiner cancels attend party:  Floor Space not available.

That happens when the room is full of people and their pets. Happens often for me, especially at my well meeting halls that are only 7x7 or 9x9 in size. Guess I need to make them bigger...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: caranha on August 05, 2010, 09:36:44 pm
(http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/3699/dwarfman.png)
I was like "OH CRAP! ITS A FARMER DWARF TITAN! HE IS GOING TO HOE US TO DEATH! I MUST BEWARE HIS DEADLY CABBAGE!" Then he wandered around not doing anything for a while, and eventually just casually walked away.

Hmm? How did this happen? Diplomat? A Dwarfy forgotten beast? Migrants? immigrating nobles?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: abadidea on August 05, 2010, 11:35:14 pm
An animal has become a stray war grizzly bear. Something about that just tickles me. (Especially since the vague sentence structure implies that it was NOT a grizzly bear before.)

The volcano one wins the thread, though.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Dorf3000 on August 06, 2010, 02:24:45 am
Gentledwarves, childbirth is dangerous.

I don't know what's more disturbing, the 'dangerous terrain' (slippery floor? ewww) or the fact that she was sparring while heavily pregnant.  "Go on Urist, try to punch me again!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Toast024 on August 06, 2010, 10:10:07 am
(http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/3699/dwarfman.png)
I was like "OH CRAP! ITS A FARMER DWARF TITAN! HE IS GOING TO HOE US TO DEATH! I MUST BEWARE HIS DEADLY CABBAGE!" Then he wandered around not doing anything for a while, and eventually just casually walked away.

Hmm? How did this happen? Diplomat? A Dwarfy forgotten beast? Migrants? immigrating nobles?

It was a weird bug that I can't explain. Wasn't a merchant, or diplomat. Not a migrant, because he wandered off the map. He was "friendly". The most reasonable theory that someone had was that he was a Dwarf that began wandering the wilds. AKA, a Dwarf sent by the mountain homes to explore ala ADVENTURE!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Saposhiente on August 06, 2010, 12:28:17 pm
Might've been a Good titan that happened to be based on a dwarf?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Vercingetorix on August 06, 2010, 12:29:49 pm
I had a mystery dwarf show up on one of my maps in the past; it didn't produce an announcement to my knowledge and the dwarf wasn't associated with the caravan since it had long since left (this was in roughly mid-summer).  The @ wandered around for a while at the edge of the map before moving on...no clue who it was, since I forgot to check their name.  I'm hoping another one shows up again with my current fort so I can investigate further.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Heavenfall on August 06, 2010, 01:26:42 pm
My next notification isn't really hilarious in itself, but
One of my dwarves had finally decided to name his axe. Curious to know what action could have inspired such an event, I zoomed in on the dwarf. He was laying in bed, sleeping, with his axe.

Quickly, my mind wandered elsewhere.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: caknuck on August 06, 2010, 01:55:59 pm
If you are relatively close to an established dwarf settlement, it may have been a random migrant wandering the world map.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: thijser on August 06, 2010, 02:01:35 pm
(http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/3699/dwarfman.png)
I was like "OH CRAP! ITS A FARMER DWARF TITAN! HE IS GOING TO HOE US TO DEATH! I MUST BEWARE HIS DEADLY CABBAGE!" Then he wandered around not doing anything for a while, and eventually just casually walked away.

Hmm? How did this happen? Diplomat? A Dwarfy forgotten beast? Migrants? immigrating nobles?

It was a weird bug that I can't explain. Wasn't a merchant, or diplomat. Not a migrant, because he wandered off the map. He was "friendly". The most reasonable theory that someone had was that he was a Dwarf that began wandering the wilds. AKA, a Dwarf sent by the mountain homes to explore ala ADVENTURE!
You could use the legends to find out who this is/was.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Tryntu on August 06, 2010, 02:41:33 pm
<Dwarf> cancels Eat: Hunting Vermin for Food.

yay first fortress. my friend who got me into this game still teases me about that.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Encased in burning magma on August 06, 2010, 02:53:55 pm
<Dwarf> cancels Eat: Hunting Vermin for Food.

Quote
yay first fortress
We gathered  ;).
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: FreakyCheeseMan on August 06, 2010, 03:37:48 pm
I recently ran a 50-year-old world because I was so frutstrated with extince elves/goblins; sadly, that was not enough time for my civ to get any significant figures, so I got no caravans and thus, eventually, no migrants.

I decided to try to compensate for this by making dwarves mature at age 2, and give birth to litters of 20-40.

I got the following two messages in a row, though I can't remember the *exact* text for the first.:

"Urist McKnockedUp has married Urist McMightySperm! They decided to forgo any formal wedding ceremony!"
"Urist McKnockedUp has given birth to many babies!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Toast024 on August 06, 2010, 04:39:19 pm
(http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/3699/dwarfman.png)
I was like "OH CRAP! ITS A FARMER DWARF TITAN! HE IS GOING TO HOE US TO DEATH! I MUST BEWARE HIS DEADLY CABBAGE!" Then he wandered around not doing anything for a while, and eventually just casually walked away.

Hmm? How did this happen? Diplomat? A Dwarfy forgotten beast? Migrants? immigrating nobles?

It was a weird bug that I can't explain. Wasn't a merchant, or diplomat. Not a migrant, because he wandered off the map. He was "friendly". The most reasonable theory that someone had was that he was a Dwarf that began wandering the wilds. AKA, a Dwarf sent by the mountain homes to explore ala ADVENTURE!
You could use the legends to find out who this is/was.

I don't have the save anymore. It was with 31.01 and I was like 'Ooooo 31.02, lets delete everything to give it a cozy bed!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: abadidea on August 06, 2010, 04:59:04 pm
cancels Fill Pond: inappropriate building.


I think this is when they try to dump from a ramp. It's a new one for me.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Nyxalinth on August 08, 2010, 02:14:00 am
Urist McWrestler cancels spar in barracks: too insane
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Kagus on August 08, 2010, 02:37:43 am
"A rhesus macaque has stolen a coke!"

Yeah.  Sneaky little buggers.  Small hands, they can grab stuff from inside the machine without putting in any quarters.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Kolbur on August 08, 2010, 12:03:30 pm
"A skinless monster diplomat from Shenepesor has arrived!"

Happened just a minute ago. Well actually it's not really unintentionally hilarious because it's indeed a skinless monster. :D
Oh those wacky gullible humans...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Comrade on August 08, 2010, 01:34:07 pm
This is the best one yet.

"There is nothing to catch in the volcano."
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 08, 2010, 01:45:03 pm
Indeed that was. It was best a long time ago, when denito posted it.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: slothen on August 08, 2010, 02:04:10 pm
I just got this one.


"The dog Child is fighting!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Encased in burning magma on August 08, 2010, 02:55:19 pm
"Urist McInjured cancels Rest: Caged."
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Heavenfall on August 08, 2010, 04:10:24 pm
I just got my first "Some new immigrants have arrived, despite the danger"

The fort underwent a tantrum spiral in which the captain of the guard and his militia went around and butchered almost all the offenders (and the rest wrestled to death in the prisons).
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
There is no doubt in my mind who or what the danger is.

Oh yeah, "lazy mclazydwarf cancels start fight: target unavailable"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Osdeath on August 08, 2010, 04:39:23 pm
I still Chuckle at "Interrupted by a muskox" no idea why, I just do.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Captain Alchatron on August 08, 2010, 06:26:11 pm
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Tholtig Fistcrypt?  Pretensions of grandeur, methinks.

I think my best was just a 'x has drowned' message.  Not too funny, except in context: this dwarf was one who had accidentally fallen into a cistern or something, and despite plenty of wounds managed to train his swimming up to Grand Master or something similar before eventually dying.  My memory of it's hazy, actually, since it was a few versions back, but I do remember it being hilarious... for whatever reason!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Evergod41 on August 09, 2010, 04:15:23 pm
(http://a.imageshack.us/img808/8435/newbitmapimager.png)

When I zoomed to is, it brought me to a stack of 5 cave lobster, next to a bucket, no dwarf in sight...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Urist McTaverish on August 09, 2010, 07:36:41 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Medicine Man on August 09, 2010, 07:51:34 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
So he carved dwarflantis?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Josephus on August 09, 2010, 07:54:38 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.

That. Is a legendary mason right there.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Sphalerite on August 09, 2010, 07:54:51 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
This is a masterful engraving of Urist McMason by Urist McMason.  Urist McMason is drowning.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Medicine Man on August 09, 2010, 07:56:57 pm
A rhesus macaque has stolen a steel bar!
A rhesus macaque has stolen a steel bar!
A rhesus macaque has stolen a steel bar!
A rhesus macaque has stolen a steel bar!

An' just like that my steel supply is crippled
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Heavenfall on August 09, 2010, 08:02:39 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
This is a masterful engraving of Urist McMason by Urist McMason.  Urist McMason is drowning.

I've been watching sitcoms all evening without breaking a smile, and THIS made me laugh out loud.

Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Urist McTaverish on August 09, 2010, 08:04:48 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
So he carved dwarflantis?
Was probably a chronology error but damn I laughed when I saw it.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: breadbocks on August 09, 2010, 08:19:02 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
So he carved dwarflantis?
From beyond the grave! OOOOOOOooooooooooooooOOOooOOOOOoOooo Spooky!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Medicine Man on August 09, 2010, 08:20:49 pm
Black bear has stolen a bunch of cave grapes 5!

I guess the temptation to eat was  8)...unbearable.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Urist McTaverish on August 09, 2010, 08:23:44 pm
A little background I suppose:

This was in an old (and ultimately failed) fort, where I had decided every wall space was going to have an engraving.  I was tunneling for a new farm and had failed to consider just how task-oriented my dwarves were when I designated the walls for engraving before the river was breached.  The above mason managed to carve the engraving before drowning in the onrushing water, but somehow the messages came out in the order I listed.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: dogstile on August 09, 2010, 08:31:00 pm
Black bear has stolen a bunch of cave grapes 5!

I guess the temptation to eat was  8)...unbearable.

UUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIST!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: jester on August 09, 2010, 10:29:24 pm
Get the feeling he put his heart and soul into a giant engraving that says: 

By locking me in your have killed me.  You DICKS. 
       
                       Yours, 
                                  Urist
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Urist Imiknorris on August 09, 2010, 10:35:01 pm
The Savanna titan Ozstag has come! A towering one-eyed spider. It has a knobby trunk and it has a regal bearing. Its lavender exoskeleton is wrinkled. Beware its poisonous bite!
Spring has arrived!
Some migrants have arrived.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: NW_Kohaku on August 09, 2010, 11:18:13 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
This is a masterful engraving of Urist McMason by Urist McMason.  Urist McMason is drowning.

Yes, I know these references are old, but...

"Maybe he had a heart attack when he was carving it?"
"If he was having a heart attack, he wouldn't CARVE "AAAAAAAAAGH", he'd just say it!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Tommy on August 10, 2010, 12:12:14 am
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
This is a masterful engraving of Urist McMason by Urist McMason.  Urist McMason is drowning.

Yes, I know these references are old, but...

"Maybe he had a heart attack when he was carving it?"
"If he was having a heart attack, he wouldn't CARVE "AAAAAAAAAGH", he'd just say it!"
This deserves a high five, if nothing else.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: KojaK on August 10, 2010, 12:51:07 am
Siga, The Forgotten Beast is no longer enraged!

o_o!

I barely had my foodstuffs inside.

Siga, The Forgotten Beast is no longer enraged!

I hadn't dug down three z levels.

Siga, The Forgotten Beast has been struck down!

O_O!

Ummm... guys... TIME TO RE-ROUTE THE RIVER!
(and stop complaining... that damn goat isn't a threat >.<)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: sinister agent on August 10, 2010, 01:47:02 pm
I had one that's not a notification, but did make me smile, about a troll.


"His heart is broken."


Poor troll.  No wonder he's so moody.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Encased in burning magma on August 10, 2010, 01:57:53 pm
I had one that's not a notification, but did make me smile, about a troll.


"His heart is broken."


Poor troll.  No wonder he's so moody.

That would explain his trolling.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Scaraban on August 10, 2010, 02:14:03 pm
Black bear has stolen a bunch of cave grapes 5!

I guess the temptation to eat was  8)...unbearable.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
This is a masterful engraving of Urist McMason by Urist McMason.  Urist McMason is drowning.

Yes, I know these references are old, but...

"Maybe he had a heart attack when he was carving it?"
"If he was having a heart attack, he wouldn't CARVE "AAAAAAAAAGH", he'd just say it!"
This deserves a high five, if nothing else.
no, guy who still high-fives!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Iapetus on August 10, 2010, 04:59:24 pm
Just started a new fort with version 0.31.12, after a few months without playing.

I've just had my first human caravan arrive, with the messages:
The human Animal Trainer Innu Uselecsha from Pessalpesor has arrived.
A human caravan from Pessalpesor has arrived.

My first thought was "Eh? Has a human just immigrated?", but it turned out that the humans had sent an animal trainer as a diplomat  ::)

I then checked the diplomat's details:

Her greasy hair is extremely long.  She is tall and scrawny.  Her very large-irised protruding dark green eyes are slit.  Her somewhat short fuse-lobed ears are very splayed out.  She has low cheekbones, and she has a deeply recessed chin.  Her lips are very thick.  Her teeth are tangled.  Her ears are somewhat narrow.  Her eyebrows are quite dense.  Her hair is goldenrod.  Her skin is pale pink.


Oh, great.  Not only do they not send a professional diplomat, they send some weird-looking inbred freak.  Obviously the humans don't view diplomatic relations with the dwarves as very important.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: NW_Kohaku on August 10, 2010, 05:16:15 pm
Oh, great.  Not only do they not send a professional diplomat, they send some weird-looking inbred freak.  Obviously the humans don't view diplomatic relations with the dwarves as very important.

The problem is that when you read the descriptions, everyone sounds like an inbred freak, thanks to Toady's less-than-flattering way of describing every roll of the dice.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: MaDeR Levap on August 11, 2010, 01:19:15 pm
Yeah, literal description of average person from photo would yeld same results.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Matz05 on October 21, 2010, 06:26:54 pm
Tangled... teeth?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: veok on October 21, 2010, 07:31:51 pm
(http://img709.imageshack.us/img709/7219/vaindwarf.png)[/URL]

Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)

Really... how vain can you be?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Skorpion on October 21, 2010, 07:52:31 pm
Urist mcMayor cancels large creature caging: Starting fist fight.
Urist mcMayor cancels start fist fight: Handling dangerous creature.

Tantrum spiral while refilling the dog cage.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: mrtspence on October 21, 2010, 07:59:07 pm
Urist McCheesemaker Cancels Start Fistfight: Target Inaccessible
Urist McInnocentBystander has been struck down
Urist McCheesemaker has been stricken with melancholy
Urist McCheesemaker has collided with an obstacle and died
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: lolghurt on October 22, 2010, 02:41:16 am
(http://img709.imageshack.us/img709/7219/vaindwarf.png)

Really... how vain can you be?
Does it have several images of the dwarf on it?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: ElthMysterius on October 22, 2010, 02:48:30 am
This barely counts, since this was in adventure mode, but...

"You stab the Human Thresher in the mouth with your large copper dagger, tearing the left cheek!"
"The large copper dagger has lodged firmly in the wound!"

The mental image I got from that was simply hilarious.

"Om nom nom"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: lolghurt on October 22, 2010, 03:48:33 am
"Om nom nom"
Om nom *stab* HEY DONT FUCKING INTERRUPT ME WHILE IM EATING THIS TASTY SWORD
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: ungulateman on October 22, 2010, 04:47:39 am
I have a completely normal mental image of you stabbing the human and tearing a big gash in their cheek because they had their mouth held wide open.

The iron anvil has lodged firmly in the wound!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: shadowzfire on October 22, 2010, 05:16:29 am
Oddom Kodudil, Stray Kitten (Tame) has adopted Obok Asteshoshosh, Herbalist. Yes thats right, my cat adopted the herbalist, not the other way around.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Ten_Tacles on October 22, 2010, 05:23:49 am
Oddom Kodudil, Stray Kitten (Tame) has adopted Obok Asteshoshosh, Herbalist. Yes thats right, my cat adopted the herbalist, not the other way around.
Thats is pretty normal.
All cats adopt dwarves.
You are new aren't you?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Daetrin on October 22, 2010, 06:44:00 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Really... how vain can you be?

You're so vain.
You probably think this artifact is about you.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Samuel on October 22, 2010, 08:43:07 am
This barely counts, since this was in adventure mode, but...

"You stab the Human Thresher in the mouth with your large copper dagger, tearing the left cheek!"

Why so serious?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Cabbagetroll on October 22, 2010, 09:25:06 am
I'll raise your incredibly vain birchen ring with an incredibly vain pig tail fiber cloak:
(http://yfrog.com/06vanitylj)Why is this happening?
Well that didn't work, here the link: http://yfrog.com/06vanitylj (http://yfrog.com/06vanitylj)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: jogar2 on October 22, 2010, 10:01:44 am
This one still makes me chuckle:
 
"The impertinent vegetation has defaced a Urist McNiceEngraving!"
 
Dang plant vandals! I bet the elves are behind this.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Doradan on March 20, 2011, 02:52:28 pm
One that went from an O FUK to an O YAY - 'Megaminer' McUrist canceled Dig: Interupted by Rutherer. I zoomed over, saw a pool of blood, and the rutherer running away. I then looked at the combat records.
The Rutherer charges at The Miner!
The Miner dodges!
The Miner punches The Rutherer in the face, breaking the nose!
The badassness of that moment was palpable.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Scaraban on March 20, 2011, 03:27:09 pm
N-N-N-NECRO!!!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Baron Baconeer on March 21, 2011, 03:28:11 am
Dumed Diamondcry is throwing a tantrum!
Dumed Diamondcry has died of infection.
Dumed Diamondcry has calmed down.

For reference, he was sleeping in the hospital having his body rotting away.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Nyxalinth on March 21, 2011, 01:36:44 pm
Dumed Diamondcry is throwing a tantrum!
Dumed Diamondcry has died of infection.
Dumed Diamondcry has calmed down.

For reference, he was sleeping in the hospital having his body rotting away.

"Shit McMotherfucker!  Goddamnit!" *tries to throw something, it falls out of his rotted hand, hits him in the head, and he dies*
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Poindexterity on March 21, 2011, 03:06:40 pm
"The pig tail fiber cloth tunic has lodged firmly in the wound."  Apparently a forest Titan ripped the shirt off the back of my woodcutter dwarf and proceeded to beat 3 dwarves to death with.
i had a minotaur steal a sock and kill its owner with it.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: RTiger on March 21, 2011, 04:43:08 pm
Thief! Protect the hoard from skulking filth!
Urist McMiner bashes Kobold thief with his copper pick, breaking the skull and tearing the brain.
Kobold Thief has been struck down.


Don't mess with the miners!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: RTiger on March 21, 2011, 05:06:24 pm
Broker is throwing a tantrum!
Trade Depot Destroyed by broker.

A caravan was in at the time. The trading must have gone really bad.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: krenshala on March 21, 2011, 05:15:07 pm
Broker is throwing a tantrum!
Trade Depot Destroyed by broker.

A caravan was in at the time. The trading must have gone really bad.
On the bright side, you get all their stuff for free (and possibly a war), right?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: [5th]Lupin on March 21, 2011, 05:25:09 pm
Urist McSoldier has grown attached to a depleted uranium breastplate!

(Probably literally)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Watwar5 on April 10, 2011, 09:11:38 pm
"The crundle punches the dwarf in the lower right back tooth from behind and the severed part flies of in an arc."
I got an image of a crundle punching a dwarf from inside of its mouth.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Jacob/Lee on April 10, 2011, 09:25:57 pm
Just started a new fort with version 0.31.12, after a few months without playing.

I've just had my first human caravan arrive, with the messages:
The human Animal Trainer Innu Uselecsha from Pessalpesor has arrived.
A human caravan from Pessalpesor has arrived.

My first thought was "Eh? Has a human just immigrated?", but it turned out that the humans had sent an animal trainer as a diplomat  ::)

I then checked the diplomat's details:

Her greasy hair is extremely long.  She is tall and scrawny.  Her very large-irised protruding dark green eyes are slit.  Her somewhat short fuse-lobed ears are very splayed out.  She has low cheekbones, and she has a deeply recessed chin.  Her lips are very thick.  Her teeth are tangled.  Her ears are somewhat narrow.  Her eyebrows are quite dense.  Her hair is goldenrod.  Her skin is pale pink.


Oh, great.  Not only do they not send a professional diplomat, they send some weird-looking inbred freak.  Obviously the humans don't view diplomatic relations with the dwarves as very important.
She sounds like a crackhead.

Anyway:
*Random merchants arrive*
A vile force of darkness has arrived!
Dwarf: Oh, let's just let them in- whoops, somebody accidently pulled the close drawbridge lever. Okay, then they'll be fin- Whoops, somebody just pulled the "The sky is falling!" lever. Okay then, maybe somebody survi- Oh look at that, somebody accidently pulled the "Noah couldn't survive this" lever. Good luck merchants.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Minnakht on April 10, 2011, 10:50:11 pm
I'll raise your incredibly vain birchen ring with an incredibly vain pig tail fiber cloak:
(http://yfrog.com/06vanitylj)Why is this happening?
Well that didn't work, here the link: http://yfrog.com/06vanitylj (http://yfrog.com/06vanitylj)


Fath Etesolin, militia commander, has created Fath Etesolin, a yak bone spear!

...unfortunately, his boner never pierced anything, as the fort fell to... a siege, I think.

However, my current fort won't, and I've got Fath Ibesholin with me. Relative?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Oliolli on April 10, 2011, 11:42:14 pm
"The Goblin Spearman stabs Urist McMacedwarf in the right hand and the severed part sails off in an arc!
 Urist McMacedwarf loses hold of the Iron Gauntlet.
 Urist McMacedwarf loses hold of the Iron Shield.
 Urist McMacedwarf bashes the goblin in the head with the Iron Mace, jamming the skull through the brain and tearing the brain.
 The Goblin Spearman has been knocked unconcious.
 The Goblin Spearman has been struck down."

"OW! Why you little..."
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Necro910 on April 10, 2011, 11:56:08 pm
N-N-N-NECRO!!!
What is it?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Scaraban on April 11, 2011, 12:01:25 am
N-N-N-NECRO!!!
What is it?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
false alarm everyone!
false alarm! go about your business
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: blue emu on April 11, 2011, 12:16:06 am
It's hard to beat the old standby: "Urist MaAlchoholic cancels Drink: Unconcious.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Scaraban on April 11, 2011, 12:18:08 am
It's hard to beat the old standby: "Urist MaAlchoholic cancels Drink: Unconcious.
I still enjoy Urist McDorf cancels Rest: Sleeping
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Necro910 on April 11, 2011, 12:20:36 am
It's hard to beat the old standby: "Urist MaAlchoholic cancels Drink: Unconcious.
I still enjoy Urist McDorf cancels Rest: Sleeping
"Dwarf cancels eating: eating"?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Scaraban on April 11, 2011, 12:30:53 am
resting and sleeping are considered two different things by the game:
you rest when injured
you sleep when tired
which to leads to said update when an injured dwarf goes to sleep
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Shurikane on April 11, 2011, 01:18:45 am
Knock knock.


Who's there?


Interrupting horse.


Interrupting horse wh--


(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v458/Shurikane/horse.gif)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: GreatWyrmGold on April 11, 2011, 06:48:15 am
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
This is a masterful engraving of Urist McMason by Urist McMason.  Urist McMason is drowning.

Yes, I know these references are old, but...

"Maybe he had a heart attack when he was carving it?"
"If he was having a heart attack, he wouldn't CARVE "AAAAAAAAAGH", he'd just say it!"
The film is still a classic.

Tangled... teeth?
I have also wondered the same thing.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: RTiger on April 11, 2011, 05:38:23 pm
I find it silly when my hunter is out hunting badgers and I get the message


Urist McHunter cancels Hunt: Interrupted by Badger Boar
Urist McHunter cancels Hunt: Interrupted by Badger Sow


The hunter is not supposed to be the hunted.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Edosurist on April 11, 2011, 07:07:45 pm
Urist McMason has drowned.
Urist McMason has carved a masterpiece!

Yes, in that order.
This is a masterful engraving of Urist McMason by Urist McMason.  Urist McMason is drowning.

Yes, I know these references are old, but...

"Maybe he had a heart attack when he was carving it?"
"If he was having a heart attack, he wouldn't CARVE "AAAAAAAAAGH", he'd just say it!"
The film is still a classic.

Tangled... teeth?
I have also wondered the same thing.

MONTY PYTHON FTW!!!

<sighs> the joys of mis. onject users: The sasquatch corpse has lodged firmly into the wound!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: _DivideByZero_ on April 11, 2011, 07:29:00 pm
"There is nothing to catch in the volcano."

That happened to me once too. I couldn't figure out what happened, but apparently there was otherwise no water on the map.

Anyway, sigged. :)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: UnrealJake on April 11, 2011, 08:01:15 pm
*Ahem* I think I'll raise the stakes a bit. 

(http://img651.imageshack.us/img651/2454/wofl.png)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: MythagoWoods on April 11, 2011, 08:09:24 pm
Urist McFisherdwarf cancels fish: Interrupted by Sea Monster.

That... is some epic fishing skills right there.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Organum on April 11, 2011, 08:55:52 pm
(http://i.imgur.com/bMGkE.png)

I imagine something like this whenever I get a "You have struck X!" message.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: psychologicalshock on April 11, 2011, 09:09:46 pm
*Ahem* I think I'll raise the stakes a bit. 

(http://img651.imageshack.us/img651/2454/wofl.png)

So what, he kissed the wolf after chopping it apart?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Edosurist on April 11, 2011, 09:45:45 pm
*Ahem* I think I'll raise the stakes a bit. 

(http://img651.imageshack.us/img651/2454/wofl.png)

So what, he kissed the wolf after chopping it apart?

maybe he's hungry
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: High Tensegrity on April 11, 2011, 10:10:27 pm
My two favorites of all time:

Marksdwarf cancels sleep: Interrupted by Duck.
Only instance of antidaephobia known in video gaming.


Also:

Dwarf cancels drink: Seeking infant.
Oh, the joys of dwarven parenting.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Edosurist on April 12, 2011, 11:53:08 am
Dwarf cancels drink: Seeking infant.
Oh, the joys of dwarven parenting.

THAT IS GOING TO BE MY NEW QUOTE FOR MY SIGNAATURE!!!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Dorfus on April 12, 2011, 12:33:16 pm
I had

Stray Horse cancels clean self: area inaccesible.

Two of her legs had been cut off and were lying a few tiles away.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: MonkeyHead on April 12, 2011, 02:41:07 pm
Combat Log - exact wording escapes me:

The Swordmaster bites the deer demon in the lower body and latches on firmly.
The Swordmaster shakes the deer demon around by the lower body.

This act produced a demon corpse in 2 bits. What a fucking hardass.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Scaraban on April 12, 2011, 11:39:18 pm
Combat Log - exact wording escapes me:

The Swordmaster bites the deer demon in the lower body and latches on firmly.
The Swordmaster shakes the deer demon around by the lower body.

This act produced a demon corpse in 2 bits. What a fucking hardass.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Stargrasper on April 14, 2011, 03:54:30 pm
Not so much hilarious as it is unique....

Quote
Ingiz Atirnakuth, expedition leader cancels Dump Item: Getting Married

Spring arrived and suddenly there were two simultaneous weddings, one between the miner and farmer, the other between the leader and an immigrant leatherworker.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Necro910 on April 14, 2011, 04:04:32 pm
Also:

Dwarf cancels drink: Seeking infant.
Oh, the joys of dwarven parenting.
MEAT SHIELD!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Uristocrat on April 14, 2011, 04:11:59 pm
Not so much hilarious as it is unique....

Quote
Ingiz Atirnakuth, expedition leader cancels Dump Item: Getting Married

Spring arrived and suddenly there were two simultaneous weddings, one between the miner and farmer, the other between the leader and an immigrant leatherworker.

Heh, so he got married just before he was going to dump her?  Kinda harsh, even referring to her as an object....
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Necro910 on April 14, 2011, 04:23:28 pm
Not so much hilarious as it is unique....

Quote
Ingiz Atirnakuth, expedition leader cancels Dump Item: Getting Married

Spring arrived and suddenly there were two simultaneous weddings, one between the miner and farmer, the other between the leader and an immigrant leatherworker.

Heh, so he got married just before he was going to dump her?  Kinda harsh, even referring to her as an object....
Ingiz Atirnakuth, expedition leader cancels Slaughter Item: Mood Satisfied.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: SalmonGod on April 14, 2011, 04:52:03 pm
My two favorite combat log excerpts

(https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/_yKfnlscH8eE/TaLmEuVR0fI/AAAAAAAABdo/HfUjrBpaOgU/s800/SturdyScrotum.png)

That's a strong scrotum...

I also had one that one ups the violent wolf kiss. 

(https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/_yKfnlscH8eE/TX8cAiLEBuI/AAAAAAAABX0/h0W16X3kCMc/s400)

So the dwarf fit his head inside the enemy's mouth to rip out it's teeth with his teeth.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Edosurist on April 15, 2011, 04:09:29 pm
My two favorite combat log excerpts

(https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/_yKfnlscH8eE/TaLmEuVR0fI/AAAAAAAABdo/HfUjrBpaOgU/s800/SturdyScrotum.png)

That's a strong scrotum...

Wha-?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Vercingetorix on April 15, 2011, 04:28:40 pm
Not so much funny as briefly frightening.  My soldiers were attending a miscellaneous object drill...when I was looking through the jobs list to see if there were any idlers that needed reassignment, it was listed as "Misc. Object Demons". 
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Aeon Blue on April 15, 2011, 05:20:53 pm
Sorry elves.
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v293/Kafeid/Misc/Sorry.jpg)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Necro910 on April 15, 2011, 05:38:33 pm
Sorry elves.
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v293/Kafeid/Misc/Sorry.jpg)
I got one that was around the lines of "Theyisallevarythang" before. I laughed so hard when they walked in.  :D
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Flying Dice on April 15, 2011, 05:41:01 pm
My two favorite combat log excerpts

(https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/_yKfnlscH8eE/TaLmEuVR0fI/AAAAAAAABdo/HfUjrBpaOgU/s800/SturdyScrotum.png)

That's a strong scrotum...

Wha-?

Was probably the Incubus/Succubus mod.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: SalmonGod on April 15, 2011, 05:50:57 pm
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Was probably the Incubus/Succubus mod.

No just Genesis
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: choobakka on April 15, 2011, 10:53:38 pm
Urist McSwordsdwarf has entered a martial trance!
*checks announcements to see where*
Urist McSwordsdwarf has left a martial trance!

Literally half a second in between.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Tharwen on April 15, 2011, 11:26:12 pm
It wasn't a notification, but I once got a combat log in which a dorf had his leg ripped off by a FB before proceeding to kick the FB in the head with his remaining leg.

'twas epic. Sadly he was torn to pieces several seconds later.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Alarion on April 16, 2011, 12:40:50 pm
Not too hilarious in its own right, but still kind of funny.

You have discovered an expansive cavern far underground.

Raw adamantine! Praise the miners!

Urist McCelebratory has organized a party at basalt table.

Coincidence or not, it was still kind of funny ;)

//A, exploring
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: RTiger on April 29, 2011, 12:00:38 pm
(http://img155.imageshack.us/img155/4849/sillyz.jpg) (http://img155.imageshack.us/i/sillyz.jpg/)

Honestly, did the two of them really want to go at it on an unfinished staircase?

I had them both working on that staircase at the time
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Necro910 on April 29, 2011, 12:12:46 pm
Not too hilarious in its own right, but still kind of funny.

You have discovered an expansive cavern far underground.

Raw adamantine! Praise the miners!

Urist McCelebratory has organized a party at basalt table.

Coincidence or not, it was still kind of funny ;)

//A, exploring
It would have been funnier if it was a brimstone table  :P
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: antymattar on April 29, 2011, 02:48:49 pm
Urist Mcsick cancels clean self: drowning.

I later checked his thoughts and it said that he had an pleasant bath...Hmm...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Musashi on April 29, 2011, 03:39:29 pm
Dishmab Bomrekomrist, Wood Burner cancels Recover Wounded: Resting injury x7.
Quote
x7

... can't find anything sarcastic enough to reply to that.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: UnrealJake on April 29, 2011, 03:43:35 pm
Dishmab Bomrekomrist, Wood Burner cancels Recover Wounded: Resting injury x7.
Quote
x7

... can't find anything sarcastic enough to reply to that.

Neither can I. And I'm British.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: SlimyMarmot on May 01, 2011, 09:36:05 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

It's the context that really makes this one. He's in jail.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Oliolli on May 01, 2011, 10:47:10 am
Wait wait wait... The mayor... Is in jail... And thusly... He can't attend a party... He himself is organizing?

That's... Uhh...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: SlimyMarmot on May 01, 2011, 11:55:45 am
For some reason he lost the election next year.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Syrup Roast on May 01, 2011, 12:21:47 pm
Here I thought he accidentally had himself put into prison for his own failed mandate.

Too bad.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Oliolli on May 01, 2011, 12:35:15 pm
Here I thought he accidentally had himself put into prison for his own failed mandate.

Too bad.

"We demand... A SHRUBBERY!!!"
"A what?!?"
_______________________________________
*LATER*
_______________________________________
"Sir, we have none of the materials required to build a shrubbery, and you are the only shrubberer around."
"NI!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Shzar on May 01, 2011, 12:55:46 pm
"Reg Idennoglesh, Hunter cancels Hunt: Hunting for vermin."

I guess she grew frustrated with larger game.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Angel Of Death on May 25, 2011, 05:39:51 am
Urist McBabyeater cancels action: Eat: Seeking infant.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: askovdk on May 25, 2011, 06:06:13 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
My count finally gets his act together and makes my miner of the original 7 his wife! A shame that there wasn't room for the newly married at the reception.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: jjdorf on May 25, 2011, 11:19:26 am
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
My count finally gets his act together and makes my miner of the original 7 his wife! A shame that there wasn't room for the newly married at the reception.
You renamed your Count "Manson7"?  As in Charlie or Marilyn?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: tolkafox on May 25, 2011, 12:40:22 pm
"Urist Mchardhands cancels action: tan a hide: Seeking infant"

Urist was tanning the wrong hide O.o

"Urist Mcpartygoer cancels attend party: Getting something to drink"

My dwarves throw the lamest parties :/
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: katana on May 25, 2011, 12:45:01 pm
My dwarves throw the lamest parties :/

They're dwarves. Throwing a party is actually a break from their everyday party. Which often involves melting, mysteriously disappearing from existence, or large animals.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Deus Machina on May 25, 2011, 01:50:53 pm
Always fun, even if it does cross between announcements and battle reports.

You have struck a cavern!
Urist McMiner cancels dig staircase: interrupted by trogoldyte.
(report) Urist McMiner strikes the troglodyte in the face with his -copper pick-.

With nothing before it. I love my miners.


My last fortress, with my military Benny Hill-ing around behind a goblin to break an ambush.

(report) The goblin stabs Catten McSpeardwarf in the lower body, tearing open the gut!
(announcement) Catten McSpeardwarf has given birth to a girl!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: DrKillPatient on May 25, 2011, 01:56:02 pm
Always fun, even if it does cross between announcements and battle reports.

You have struck a cavern!
Urist McMiner cancels dig staircase: interrupted by trogoldyte.
(report) Urist McMiner strikes the troglodyte in the face with his -copper pick-.

With nothing before it. I love my miners.

I think miners just keep digging and don't actually realise that they've put a pick through the head of someone/thing. They're dwarves, after all.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Necro910 on May 25, 2011, 02:06:45 pm
(report) The goblin stabs Catten McSpeardwarf in the lower body, tearing open the gut!
(announcement) Catten McSpeardwarf has given birth to a girl!
Dwarven C-Section.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: kaenneth on May 25, 2011, 09:18:53 pm
(report) The goblin stabs Catten McSpeardwarf in the lower body, tearing open the gut!
(announcement) Catten McSpeardwarf has given birth to a girl!
Dwarven C-Section.
Just be glad it wasn't a snatcher...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Yag Alone on May 26, 2011, 03:13:11 pm
"The crundle punches the dwarf in the lower right back tooth from behind and the severed part flies of in an arc."
I got an image of a crundle punching a dwarf from inside of its mouth.

This one is on the same vein, but even.... worse :)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(yes, it's quite old)

I can't even figure how it can be possible without... I don't know... smashing the brain?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Greiger on May 26, 2011, 05:51:15 pm
A girl have hatched.
Gro Heargkearisj, Fisherman cancels Drink: Seeking Infant.
Maustrix Erithrikcosjir, Hatchling has died after colliding with an obstacle.

Though I imagine this didn't exactly happen all in the same moment, by the time I saw the full log it certainly looked like it did. 

See? Drinking is bad for mothers, that egg rolled out of the nest and fell out the window while she was too busy enjoying her booze.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Necro910 on May 26, 2011, 05:59:17 pm
A girl have hatched.
Gro Heargkearisj, Fisherman cancels Drink: Seeking Infant.
Maustrix Erithrikcosjir, Hatchling has died after colliding with an obstacle.

Though I imagine this didn't exactly happen all in the same moment, by the time I saw the full log it certainly looked like it did. 

See? Drinking is bad for mothers, that egg rolled out of the nest and fell out the window while she was too busy enjoying her booze.
Looks like someone drank during pregnancy  :P

Errr.... what's it called for reptiles? Not hatching....  :-\
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Nyxalinth on May 26, 2011, 06:24:32 pm
"The crundle punches the dwarf in the lower right back tooth from behind and the severed part flies of in an arc."
I got an image of a crundle punching a dwarf from inside of its mouth.

This one is on the same vein, but even.... worse :)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(yes, it's quite old)

I can't even figure how it can be possible without... I don't know... smashing the brain?

say, you didn't happen to play around with duplicating the raws, did you?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Yag Alone on May 26, 2011, 06:33:30 pm
"The crundle punches the dwarf in the lower right back tooth from behind and the severed part flies of in an arc."
I got an image of a crundle punching a dwarf from inside of its mouth.

This one is on the same vein, but even.... worse :)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(yes, it's quite old)

I can't even figure how it can be possible without... I don't know... smashing the brain?

say, you didn't happen to play around with duplicating the raws, did you?

Mmmh... probably not. The only raw editing I made back on those days was usually for making GCS fertiles...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Syrup Roast on May 27, 2011, 12:00:42 am
"The crundle punches the dwarf in the lower right back tooth from behind and the severed part flies of in an arc."
I got an image of a crundle punching a dwarf from inside of its mouth.

This one is on the same vein, but even.... worse :)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(yes, it's quite old)

I can't even figure how it can be possible without... I don't know... smashing the brain?

say, you didn't happen to play around with duplicating the raws, did you?

Mmmh... probably not. The only raw editing I made back on those days was usually for making GCS fertiles...
The goblin's head was probably turned sideways.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Oliolli on May 27, 2011, 12:04:40 am
"The crundle punches the dwarf in the lower right back tooth from behind and the severed part flies of in an arc."
I got an image of a crundle punching a dwarf from inside of its mouth.

This one is on the same vein, but even.... worse :)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(yes, it's quite old)

I can't even figure how it can be possible without... I don't know... smashing the brain?

The arrow flew around his head.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Remalle on May 27, 2011, 12:40:14 am
You renamed your Count "Manson7"?  As in Charlie or Marilyn?
Why not Shirley?
Always fun, even if it does cross between announcements and battle reports.
You have struck a cavern!
Urist McMiner cancels dig staircase: interrupted by trogoldyte.
(report) Urist McMiner strikes the troglodyte in the face with his -copper pick-.
With nothing before it. I love my miners.
I got the mental image of a troglodyte sticking it's face right next to the cavern ceiling as Urist cleared away the last bit of rock...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Jessoftherocks on May 27, 2011, 03:08:47 am
Happened to me the other day and I cracked up, giving the circumstances went something like this UristMcDisregardsSeasonalChanges has been entombed in Ice!  Whats even more hilarious was right before the seasonal save UristMcBeginnerSwimmer drowned and than apparently the other dwarf fell in right after and didnt suffocate but literally was frozen out o existence.    Poor feller
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: krenshala on May 27, 2011, 08:30:01 pm
Happened to me the other day and I cracked up, giving the circumstances went something like this UristMcDisregardsSeasonalChanges has been entombed in Ice!  Whats even more hilarious was right before the seasonal save UristMcBeginnerSwimmer drowned and than apparently the other dwarf fell in right after and didnt suffocate but literally was frozen out o existence.    Poor feller
Don't forget to dig out the ice and recover the pick (and any other useful equipment). ;)

oh, and you can recover the bodies for "proper" burial as well.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Oliolli on May 28, 2011, 04:10:29 am
"Proper" meaning magma burial?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Jessoftherocks on May 28, 2011, 02:39:57 pm
SO .....I went back the next winter and tried to dig out the spot where UristMcDisregardsSeasonalchanges was entombed in ice and he has just vanished, no pick , not a dwarf'n thing. Is this just a random atom disappearance? Or does it usually leave them behind?
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: GreatWyrmGold on May 28, 2011, 07:27:29 pm
SO .....I went back the next winter and tried to dig out the spot where UristMcDisregardsSeasonalchanges was entombed in ice and he has just vanished, no pick , not a dwarf'n thing. Is this just a random atom disappearance? Or does it usually leave them behind?
If you mined out the right spot and the ice did not thaw first, the pick should be there...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Urk on May 31, 2011, 12:58:24 pm
I just recently got siege and bunch of ambushes, there were lots of goblins and few of little nastier goblin castes i had modded in - my military was victorious though, but there was lots of injuries causing my hospital to fill up with patients.

And just when i needed my chief medical dwarf most, he stops doing his medical duties and gets fey mood...

...luckily he gets all ingredients he needed and makes tetrahedrite scepted "Butcherstops the Wing of Trails".

So he stops taking care if his patients and makes artifact named Butcherstops, huh? Maybe he plans to use it to euthanize patients that are in too bad condition, or those who he doesn't like much. Or maybe he hates working as doctor and wants to be butcher instead.  ::)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Neyvn on May 31, 2011, 10:17:11 pm
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

It's the context that really makes this one. He's in jail.
Mayor, Sitting on a stool in his cell. He stands up and leans close to the Bars and whispers into the wardens ears.
"Hey I got an idea, you let me out, and we can all go have a Party..."
The warden thinks for amoment,
"You know what, thats a great Idea... HEY EVERYONE MR MAYOR IS THROWING A PARTY AT THE STATUE!!!!"

The Mayor blinks for a moment as the Warden runs off...
"Um?? Ain't you forgetting something? Hello??? Anyone?? ITS MY PARTY!!!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Corona688 on June 01, 2011, 01:27:37 am
SO .....I went back the next winter and tried to dig out the spot where UristMcDisregardsSeasonalchanges was entombed in ice and he has just vanished, no pick , not a dwarf'n thing. Is this just a random atom disappearance? Or does it usually leave them behind?
If you mined out the right spot and the ice did not thaw first, the pick should be there...
This effect was discovered by some guy who made an incredibly badass ice trap that caught masses of goblins inside water, then exposed it to the sky, freezing them all solid, then pumped in magma from underneath, melting it all for the next batch.  The goblins would just VANISH every time, though the corpses kept mounting in the stocks screen.

Eventually he tried digging instead of melting.  Titanic piles of dead stinking goblins and clothing and items heaped high to the sky vorped out of hyperspace wherever they dug.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Nyxalinth on June 01, 2011, 06:04:34 pm
I just recently got siege and bunch of ambushes, there were lots of goblins and few of little nastier goblin castes i had modded in - my military was victorious though, but there was lots of injuries causing my hospital to fill up with patients.

And just when i needed my chief medical dwarf most, he stops doing his medical duties and gets fey mood...

...luckily he gets all ingredients he needed and makes tetrahedrite scepted "Butcherstops the Wing of Trails".

So he stops taking care if his patients and makes artifact named Butcherstops, huh? Maybe he plans to use it to euthanize patients that are in too bad condition, or those who he doesn't like much. Or maybe he hates working as doctor and wants to be butcher instead.  ::)

Rename him Maxwell Edison immediately!  Too bad it wasn't a silver hammer.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Horizonblue on June 01, 2011, 09:12:07 pm
Urist Mcthirsty cancels Drink: Interrupted by Mason.

I knew it, its all a conspiracy!
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Madurjafro on June 20, 2011, 12:58:07 pm
"The crundle punches the dwarf in the lower right back tooth from behind and the severed part flies of in an arc."
I got an image of a crundle punching a dwarf from inside of its mouth.

This one is on the same vein, but even.... worse :)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(yes, it's quite old)

I can't even figure how it can be possible without... I don't know... smashing the brain?

say, you didn't happen to play around with duplicating the raws, did you?

Best thing is, That doesn't come from Messing with the Raws

I've seen it a couple of times while messing on the Arena
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Soapalope on June 20, 2011, 01:05:44 pm
When my Legendary Woodcutter was pushed off a cliff by an errant fox, because he was too hasty to take a drink from the barrel. Didn't notice at first, until I read the announcements and saw the "----- has died!" message.

He fell down a 16 z-level chasm into a 4 z-level deep river.

He didn't even attempt to swim.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: dagger on June 20, 2011, 04:00:59 pm
Moose Brute Diplomat

Omag Kusnkedusm Ngos Tello

A gigantic moose twisted into humanoid form with lidless eyes. It has a bloated
body. Its teal hair is unkempt. Beware its noxious secretions!


Diplomat Stymied: A diplomat has left unhappy
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Jalapeño Cheesepuffs on June 20, 2011, 04:57:58 pm
Not exactly a notification, but I sat shocked in my chair for at least a few seconds after reading it:

(http://i.imgur.com/sQfnD.png)

Agak translates roughly into Anus in the mainstream dwarven dialect.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: krenshala on June 22, 2011, 09:18:48 pm
The best I've got is a couple of messages that read: The Speardwarf stabs the Elf in the nose, and the severed part sales off in an arc.

Same dwarf, same battle, two different elves.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Cheveux on June 22, 2011, 10:06:30 pm
The best I've got is a couple of messages that read: The Speardwarf stabs the Elf in the nose, and the severed part sales off in an arc.

Same dwarf, same battle, two different elves.

I hope your dwarf get the title "The face lifter".
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Mintaka on June 22, 2011, 10:44:20 pm
(http://i51.tinypic.com/aw9w74.jpg)

He was fighting with a "towering feathered leech" beast, which apparently was an absurdly good wrestler.  He went flying about ten squares-- apparently losing his socks and shoes in the process-- hit a wall, and died instantly.  "It hit him so hard it knocked his socks off" was what had me in stitches, but "blows apart" is also an interesting mental image. 
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Syrup Roast on June 22, 2011, 10:50:03 pm
(http://i51.tinypic.com/aw9w74.jpg)

He was fighting with a "towering feathered leech" beast, which apparently was an absurdly good wrestler.  He went flying about ten squares-- apparently losing his socks and shoes in the process-- hit a wall, and died instantly.  "It hit him so hard it knocked his socks off" was what had me in stitches, but "blows apart" is also an interesting mental image.
(http://subtlechaos.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/durarara-gif1.gif)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Oliolli on June 23, 2011, 12:05:57 am
Actually, him blowing apart, meaning he gets epicly dismembered, means he "loses hold of" anything he was wearing, just like a dwarf "loses hold of" his gauntlet when his hand gets chopped off.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: GreatWyrmGold on July 02, 2011, 12:53:45 pm
As an adventurer, but whatever.

"The wolf gives in to pain.
The wolf has bled to death.
The wolf regains consciousness."

They were probably different wolves, but still...
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Oliolli on July 02, 2011, 03:10:26 pm
Remember, soon it can happen with a single wolf  :o
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: krenshala on July 10, 2011, 03:49:13 pm
Actually, him blowing apart, meaning he gets epicly dismembered, means he "loses hold of" anything he was wearing, just like a dwarf "loses hold of" his gauntlet when his hand gets chopped off.
The part that has me worried is why he was only wearing shoes and socks ... :o
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: UristMcHuman on July 10, 2011, 06:58:05 pm
(http://i51.tinypic.com/aw9w74.jpg)

He was fighting with a "towering feathered leech" beast, which apparently was an absurdly good wrestler.  He went flying about ten squares-- apparently losing his socks and shoes in the process-- hit a wall, and died instantly.  "It hit him so hard it knocked his socks off" was what had me in stitches, but "blows apart" is also an interesting mental image.

Ouch. Now THAT would certainly knock yer socks off.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Sphalerite on July 10, 2011, 08:06:46 pm
Actually, you only get the 'loses hold of ...' message if they're still alive, dropping items after death doesn't give that message.  So his socks and shoes were knocked off before he died.  Probably the blow that send him flying into an obstacle tore his legs off, which is why his shoes and socks fell off.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: GreatWyrmGold on July 10, 2011, 09:26:24 pm
Urist McSeveraldwarves cancel Action: Resting injury.

The injury? Numbness.

"Oh, no, I don't feel any pain! I gotta go to a hospital bed!"
The way I understand it, it should be:
"I feel pain! Oh, no, I don't gotta go to any hospital bed!"
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Oliolli on July 11, 2011, 03:39:25 am
Actually, him blowing apart, meaning he gets epicly dismembered, means he "loses hold of" anything he was wearing, just like a dwarf "loses hold of" his gauntlet when his hand gets chopped off.
The part that has me worried is why he was only wearing shoes and socks ... :o

The report was from page 4, previous pages may have included other stuff.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Nyxalinth on February 16, 2012, 12:48:14 am
Thread Necro!

Tonight during the Great Necromancer Invasion, I had this one:

Urist McFarmer cancels Pen/Pasture Large Creature: Handling Dangerous Animal (or words to that effect)
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: bukitodinos on May 04, 2012, 03:09:15 pm
one of the cats fell down the expedition to hell

so i just watched it fall until i got the message

by that time i was in tears because all of the FBs noticed the cat and jumped in to hell

 :D :D :D :D
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: peskyninja on May 04, 2012, 05:08:04 pm
FB, a fire-breathing three eyed ass. It took me some time to realize that I was being attacked by a donkey.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: bukitodinos on May 04, 2012, 06:23:35 pm
FB, a fire-breathing three eyed ass. It took me some time to realize that I was being attacked by a donkey.

in my siggy
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Codyo on May 04, 2012, 07:16:28 pm
Not really a notification but close enough :P

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Spoiler (click to show/hide)


Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Hanslanda on May 04, 2012, 08:15:30 pm
My god sir, you win the internet for that.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Veylon on May 05, 2012, 12:55:13 am
In my earlier forts, I tended to leave the stuff I embarked with scattered on the ground. And so I received the message that a raccoon had stolen my anvil. My mind boggles at the logistics of that.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Aviator CJ on May 05, 2012, 01:03:53 am
Keas are notorious for stealing stuff like that, which is even more mind-boggling than a raccoon.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Shoruke on May 05, 2012, 01:52:08 am
A dorf took the task of chaining one of the grizzly bears I just bought to the rope in the entrance hallway. When the goblin ambushes started this month, I set the burrows active... which didn't include that particular rope (I don't want civvies in the entryway when there's fighting so I don't include it in the burrows). So, this dorf decides it's time to go spin some thread. He walks back down the hallway, and down the stairs...

"Wait a sec! I can't spin threads right now, I am holding onto a GODDAMN GRIZZLY BEAR."
"Maybe I should deal with that first."
"Wait, I can't, he's not in the burrow."
"Guess I'll go spin some thread."
"THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR SPINNING THREAD I AM HOLDING A GRIZZLY BEAR."
"I guess I'll just throw him back in the cage or something."
"Wait, no I shouldn't, I shouldn't leave the burrow..."

The bear wouldn't move because the dorf was holding him. The dorf, wracked with indecision, wouldn't move anywhere. In two seconds, SO MUCH JOB CANCELLATION.
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Castamere on May 05, 2012, 03:30:29 am
Urist Mcgoing20zstothecavernstocleanhimself cancels Clean: Interrupted by Forgotten beast

serves him and his mutilated 20 pieces right for not using the well
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: bukitodinos on May 05, 2012, 09:15:15 am
THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR SPINNING THREAD I AM HOLDING A GRIZZLY BEAR!

added to my growing quote horde
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: RibaldRon on May 06, 2012, 04:38:42 am
I just got "Kol Oddomes, Peasant cancels Start Fist Fight: Too injured." I laughed. 
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Thread Necro!

Tonight during the Great Necromancer Invasion ...
Nice.  Good necro though.  :P
Title: Re: Most unintentionally hilarious notification you've gotten?
Post by: Sus on May 06, 2012, 05:16:57 am
I'm going to go with either

The Human Farmer Kosoth Talldwarf has come!
A medium-sized creature prone to great ambition.
Now you will know why you fear the night!

or

Urist McAxdorf has been unhappy lately. She was depressed by long patrol duty lately. She was upset about being relieved from duty.

[big damn edit]
A combat report with several pages of
The Crafter bashes the Goblin Spearman in the head with his -«alder crutch»-, but the attack is deflected by the Goblin Spearman's «copper helm»!

No word on whether or not he also called the invader a "squirrely young whipper-snapper" and told it to speak up and stop fidgeting (despite the latter being unconscious at the time).