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Author Topic: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!  (Read 21978 times)

Aavak

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Re: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!
« Reply #30 on: April 06, 2013, 07:21:08 pm »

Sixth day of Spring, Year Four:
As expected, given that they had been fighting ceaselessly for so long, our military fumbled at a crucial moment. Once the lines had begun to buckle, Cinderfragment seized their opportunity and pressed the attack, driving deeply into the Kingdom. Deeper than any enemy had penetrated since the very earliest days of Spiderslaughter. It was only a matter of time, then, before they cut down one of our warriors.

Rest well, Posljednjalegija, or as many knew you, "Last Legion."

With the battle won, but our gnomes tired and many wounded, we now seal the gates and turn our focus inward. While our military recovers it is time we consider excavating more room for our expanding Kingdom.



Aavak

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Re: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!
« Reply #31 on: April 11, 2013, 11:53:34 am »

Eighth day of Spring, Year Four:
During the course of the last few days much of the planned work had to be put on hold. Although we were able to delve many meters deeper into the mountain, an emergency arose which necessitated the destruction of all the crossbows in the Kingdom. I am told by our tinkerers that a previously unnoticed flaw in the design was to blame, and that they are fast at work addressing the issue. While unplanned, this does mean we will be updating the crossbows to steel, much to the delight of our crossbow-Gnomes.

However, now that we have the plans in place (including a streamlining of our current stockpiles) our focus returns to driving deeper into the mountain. One of the junior record keepers came to me with a text they had discovered in some of the supplies brought by one of the Gnomads, detailing experimentation in a distant kingdom. The text explains how they had tried to intentionally lure weaker opponents from the darkness beneath the kingdom, in order to afford their military an opportunity to train more vigorously, without being in significant risk. IncompetentLP has shown considerably interest in these experiments, and has urged us to pick up from where the texts left off...



Aavak

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Re: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!
« Reply #32 on: April 13, 2013, 08:58:45 am »

Twelfth day of Spring, Year Four:
Progress has been made on our initial attempt at replicating the conditions the texts lay out, in order to draw opponents to us. However, as yet, no enemies have stood forward to challenge the might of our fort. Nevertheless, we maintain a constant watch on the dark caverns we have excavated, the troops in a constant state of readiness.

But while our military and engineers wait with baited breath, hoping that they have followed the instructions correctly, I am reminded that the first of Summer quickly approaches. With it, comes the promise of a Gnomad migration! I have issued orders to finalise the expansion of our great hall, in hopes that rumours of our wealth and prosperity will tempt even more Gnomads to join our ranks... we desperately need them.



Aavak

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Re: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!
« Reply #33 on: April 18, 2013, 12:23:00 am »

Second day of Summer, Year Four:
Regrettably, and despite our best efforts to improve the attractiveness of our Kingdom, it seems that no Gnomads chose to make the journey to Spiderslaughter this season. Moral about the Kingdom has been understandably lowered by these ill tidings, especially given our dire need for more gnome-power.

However, although it is of small comfort to the civilians of the Kingdom, our military were pleased to find that the instructions we have followed have indeed managed to lure creatures from the darkness. Skeletons and Golems have been spotted, though they were  surprisingly weak given what we had been lead to expect.

We will continue to be on alert however, it could be that these creatures have yet to show their full strength. However, if they should continue to send such meagre forces against us, then soon we will be forced to delve deeper, in search of stronger opponents against which to hone our skills!



Aavak

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Re: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!
« Reply #34 on: April 20, 2013, 05:29:23 pm »

Fifth day of Summer, Year Four:
While our military continued to swat at Golems and Skeletons, our civilians continued work on replacing our dirt fortifications with stone. It will be a large project, and initially we will restrict it to the gatehouse and future barracks. However, as the arrival of merchants looms, we arrayed our military in preparation for the inevitable need to clear a safe path to our gatehouse through the remnants of yet another Cinderfragment clash with the Mants.

Now, with the merchant caravan nearly at our gates, it is time to unleash the might of our soldiers. We have already laid down additional market stalls to accommodate any extra merchants, given the season, so it rests now with the Fortified Seals and Velvetevildoers as to whether any of the traders can safely reach them or not.



Aavak

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Re: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!
« Reply #35 on: April 27, 2013, 01:54:58 pm »

Seventh day of Summer, Year Four:
As has become expected of the legendary heroes of Spiderslaughter, the meagre troops sent from Cinderfragment were no match, and many merchants were able to safely reach our market stalls. However, while we were busy trading, our Gnomes were themselves busy trying to haul in the spoils of previous battles... and once again, our greed has lead to the loss of one of our number.

Lessons shall be learned so that such tragedies can be avoided in the future. Rest peacefully, Lobsteroo.

However, with midsummer now past, and the threat of war gradually diminishing before the might of our great warriors Millionfoul and IncompetentLP, a new enemy looms on the horizon. This time, our soldiers will be of little use against our ever-present foe...



Aavak

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Tenth day of Summer, Year Four:
We came to the realisation that our food stocks were dwindling all too late, it seems. The last days have been quiet, with the population of Spiderslaughter trying their best to conceal their fears while working feverishly to prepare for the hungry times that lay ahead of us. It's clear that we'll all need to cut new notches in our belts over the coming Autumn.

Now, with Summer coming to an end, and having had a little time to properly consider the roles which are important and those which could suffer having their workers re-purposed to tending fields or livestock, it is time to look at any other way we can improve the efficiency of our Kingdom's food and drink production. A task long overdue.



Aavak

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Twelfth day of Summer, Year Four:
With work begun on moving our food and drink industries up, closer to the great hall and to the farms which feed them, the Kingdom seems to slowly be recovering from its brush with famine. It's still far too early to begin any celebrations yet, but at the very least there is food available as and when a Gnome gets hungry. A vast improvement from a few days ago.

However, the end of Summer is here, and that means that the beginning of Autumn will be chasing its shadow. With it, the promise of more Gnomads... both a blessing, and a curse. We need, as always we do, more hands to work the fields and tend the animals, but can we afford any more mouths to feed?



Aavak

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First day of Winter, Year Four:
Despite our fears, or perhaps because of them, very few Gnomads were willing to make the journey to Spiderslaughter during Autumn. Of those who began the journey, only one made it to the Kingdom's perimeter, however their timing could not have been worse.

Arriving in the middle of a mant and goblin skirmish, Wobble picked a cunning, winding path through the enemy ranks, and ultimately into the safety of Spiderslaughter's embrace.

However, beyond Wobble's victorious escape from doom, Autumn came and went with little ceremony. Much work has been completed on replacing the dirt walls which, up to now, have characterised our Kingdom with durable stone blocks. But our focus now must turn to the Gnomads who have just arrived, and the Mants that look to greet them with gnashing mandibles!



Bluerobin

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I'm not even close to caught up (I think I'm still before episode 10), but congratulations on another series that's going to detract from my productivity at work! I'm a bit sad I didn't start watching this one earlier, but now I have something like 30 hours of really interesting and pretty fun content to catch up on, which is never a bad thing.
Logged
The moment the lever was pulled, somebody's pet kitten stepped onto the bridge. I read somewhere that if a cat falls more than 11 stories, it instinctively flares its legs out to increase air resistance. This slows it down enough to stick the landing with relatively minor injuries. In Dwarf Fortress, apparently, cats don't do that.

Aavak

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I'm glad you're enjoying it! I often let LPs build up a bit before I start watching a series, it's fun to just be able to sit back and watch a few episodes back to back :D

Aavak

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Second day of Winter, Year Four:
Despite the best efforts of the suicidal Gnomads, and the sudden onset of narcolepsy which rendered the majority of the Fortified Seals unable to aid the Gnomads in their plight, Spiderslaughter was at last able to welcome five new citizens.

But now that our military has cleared the hillside of the agents of Cinderfragment we may have time to pull in more of the spoils that litter the fields of battle. If we're lucky we may be able to smelt some of them down in order to make new steel weapons and armour of our own!



Aavak

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Fourth day of Winter, Year Four:
While the brave civilians of Spiderslaughter rushed about constructing temporary stockpiles to hasten the collection of armour and weapons from past battles, our military waded into the frequent and ever-improving forces sent from Cinderfragment with cold, terrible goblin-killing efficiency.

Now, under the watchful gaze of our military we can perhaps relax. I have issued the order to our guild masters to consider ways in which we can improve the efficiency of our labourers and they promise me that we can expect vast improvements in the near future... and yet, despite the good news and relative calm, I can't seem to shake this nagging feeling that this winter will grow dark.



Aavak

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Re: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!
« Reply #43 on: June 02, 2013, 02:01:41 pm »

Fifth day of Winter, Year Four:
Tragedy has struck! It seems the forces of Cinderfragment sent in the previous days were not dispatched with the typical order to conquer our Kingdom. Nay, it seems the cruel taskmasters of the Goblin lands have finally accepted that our troops are far too capable for any direct siege to succeed. Instead, they sent an entire squad to their deaths with but one order, to launch a coordinated attack against our soldiers, to weaken the legendary Fortified Seals by targeting one Gnome at a time.

And thus, with great sadness and mounting alarm, I must record the deaths of Sero, and WateryPillow.

It is clear now, that we have pushed our luck too far, and our grand intentions of finally clearing all the random items of armour and weapons from beyond the gates was too ambitious. Therefore, I have issued the order to recover the crates that have been filled, and to leave whatever armour that remains outside as our workers and military retreat behind the safety of our walls.



Aavak

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Re: Let's mismanage a Kingdom and get eaten by Honey Badgers in Gnomoria!
« Reply #44 on: June 03, 2013, 04:13:54 am »

Seventh day of Winter, Year Four:
With surprising efficiency (it seems the guild masters were true to their word) our workers hauled in the valuable crates of armour and weapons, for which Sero and Waterypillow had given their lives protecting, and once everyone was safely inside, the walls were once again sealed.

Now, with the Kingdom once again sealed off from the outside world we can return to our plans to descend deeper into the earth. If not to create a new training area, then to gather more stone, as it seems our stockpiles are beginning to empty. But before we issue too many mining orders, I hear the tinkerers wish to speak with us about a breakthrough...



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