15th Malachite, 3:06 I'm back, I outdrunk my roommate TWICE in same day! Now mack to managing a forrtresss!
Migrants! Welcome to somewhre! I'll HAVE to make some corssbows wso these guys can start ttraining archery by h unting.
18th Malachite, 3:10, Migrants, Amazingly just two, sent one to militia commander and one to archer squad. Why is ther another squad before them, and how could I even name this guy milita commander or how could I have a preavious militia without a military commander? We now have nine dwarves and I have confused myself with the milityha organization.
I kind of lost count of drinks during the second party, but I'd presume one more bee and two more ciders. Now I'm drinking a cider again, and have displaced the glass I drink the bees from.
9th Galaena, 3:20 Bow Bow Fight the powah! Our bows suck, but if the hunters use them enough they'll learn before we get through the aquifier to actual metals those our wewaponsmith can use.
3:22 Getting a new bee.
18th Galena, 3:27AM, Amazing duprinesa of derp! I donät know why this isnt working as well as I hope, but Wait aminute! Louse woman interrupts work?! Murder squads engage!
Rakust Pageclout dodget into a bowl of water and is now flailing there.
Holy crap, theres a GIANT louse here! One of my dwarves has an axe, but I dont know if he's the one who's currently drowning ona ramp of shallow water.
Yes he was. The UNARMERD axedwarf just bit the head off a louse woman. The giant louse diasppeard somehwere, so I think... no, we'll kill everything now that we can! YEAH! Kick that louse brain in tao is brain!
Would training axes be better than fists? I could build them if they were.
11th Limestone, 3:42 am: Why dwarves? Why gooses, why you not lay in nest boxes? We're surprisingly ok, alhtough we havent really succeeded in anything special. I dug a ditch to the north, but I have no idea why th... oh, the waves throw some water in it. I guess its ok enough to be ignored now. Finished a cider and started anew one.
Did I mention starting a new bee? Because I did.
2nd Sandstone 3:42 BuzzaARDS! We have one marksdwarf, who shall now start hunting anything like he was meant to from the beginning. Shoot at anything until youre good enough to qualify as militia, thats my motto!
My face is so palmed. He failed to return a dead buzzard, because he was interrupted by live one. KILL EM ALL!
5th Sandstone, 3:51 AM: Its like the autumg brought a swarm of buzzards! There are more buzzards than there are dwarves, and the crossbowdwarf is shooting them down as fastr as he can!'ll drink the bee in one gulp to get drunk enough to pleay the rest of the turn, because I just got the ultimate timewaste project done. The aquifier hasnt been breached yet, and I doubt I'll do that in my turn. Someone will do it fastre than I so I'll spend my time somehwere else.
8th Sandstone, 3:56AM: Everyhthing is at standstill because everhthing is interrupted by buzzards! The refuse pile is full of dead buzzards, and the air is full of buzzards apparently feeding on the dead buzzards corpses! Migrants arrived, they shall ALL HOLY SHIT, one is missing a tongue! We now have 16 dwaqrves, half of who are drafted to milita that never sparrs mbecause we have nothing to spar with. I'll build a trade depot, because right now elven wooden gear woule be better than having darves get attached to training gear.
I made our cook hunt so we'll have less buzzards around here.
4:05 Dwarfed Bobnova the Stabmaster, because he was the first one I found to have requested dwarfing. The dwarfing list should be somehwere easily accessible for drunken players. I'll dwarvf myself now that I thought of it !
18th Sandstone, 4:10'AM, Everything, EVERYTHING is at stanstiill because the buzzards interrupt everyone going anywhere! Assigned more dwarves to kill everything, and one to make more buzzard bone bolts to hunt more buzzards with. It is like fighting the sky itself!
28th Sandstone, 4:16AM, Startng a project to pierce the aquifier with a plug. Worst idea ever,maybe, but it might help the next negeration of players. Not gonna make a new bee, but I'll drink 18% chocolade liquor with cider from now on.
7th timber, 4:20AM, Its only late autunm? Holy shite time goes slow when something something. I think I incidentally deviced a most irrelugar drowning trap ever, which works on wave power alone. Complteley unintentional, but it WILL be fun wen someone actually drowns from it.
16th Timber, 4:25 AM: How do I aquifier plug? My plug is now exactly the wrong size to be practical, but if it works it will do some good. If not, at elast it should be big enough to drill through with a double slit method I have tried twice. Both times I tired dit I found a way through aquifier at an other point, making my efforts an useless disaster site in the middle of the main hallway. Which is why I started this off the main fortress areas.
18 Timber, 4:29: Rectal anus of arses! The dwarven caravan arrived, and the wagons passed our site sas impassable! Because of our ditch ON THIS SITDE OF THE RIVER! The carawan came from exactly the wrong side, but I hope we get something from the mules alone. I'll also build a GRAND wooden bridge for next years, at least I know where theyre coming from now.
4:32 The diplomat scared me. I thought we were under siege when the screen went black with some text on it! I requested some steel and steel accessories.
Holy crap, I can see my stocks in the middle of trading?! This would have been useless a thousand times before now.
*Moment of appreciation for "Scootaloo stares at you for 10 minutes while I play epic music*
'tis is epic, but I shall trade now. Apparently my random dwarfsona has made some crafts, which I would be proud of if they werent made of wood, which is the only resource available for now.
Oh Scootaloo, you're so epic!
The trade was absolutely crappy, but Scootaloo is epic! We got one bronze sword, a bin of leather and three pieces of cloth, but holy shit scootaloo is epic! I recommend it for everyone ever!
Most exeptionally, the mountainhomes will pay extra for absolutely nothing. I wonder why they sent the liaison in the first place.
Oh NOW he wants stuff! He just wanted to repeat what I wanted first, but with some failed quotes apparently. Only thing that did was make me regret not buying any fox leather for some foxy uniforms. Which I now regret a lot.
8th Moonstone, 4:56AM, The aquifier plug project is proceeding faster than expected. I am SO unqualified to do this.
15th Moonstone, 4:59: Just wanted to write that I feel awesome! Some dwarves are about to die, but the ... wait ... The dwarves about to die have nothing to do with the projects praised after this. If the next guy dies, he will be just a failure. Lets see what happens.
EMAGHERD! I did everything as idiotproof as possible, but you should never underestimate the creativeness of idiots! Surprisilngly he survied, but now I also realised that I myself failed this very project. I failed to dig the whole plug area BERFORE plugging it, so now I plugged part of it while ... awe I just failed. I double dutied our dormitory as hopsital so our miner can go there to get his arm fixed by the next dwarf I assignh for that. In fact, now that I'm the overseer, I'll also decide I'M the chief medical dwarf! Boyah! I'm in your hospital, mistreating your doodz!
Anyway, now we have some flooding in living quargers, but its not aquificiar or anything. Just some ... what , how far does that spread.
2nd Oåpal, 5:15: I kind of forgot what I was writing about. Needs a check.. Oh, I'm trying a minimalistic aquifier plug with only .. too little space to ever work? Yeah, I'll try bigger one again.
6th Opåal, 5:17: I wonder if the dwarves are as drunk as I am. The last few errors they've done are what I would have done too. On the other hand, I wouldnt' sleep in the dirt if there were god bedrooms available!
5:34 I've now drunk half a bottle of chocolate liqueur, and I'm a little bit overwhelmend by how drukn I am. The dwarves work ok. Theyä've brewered all their food to drinks, and no ones died yet. The time for the next awesome pluggage is hare!
Why dwarves, WHY do you have to stand on the plug when it0s being dropped?! Nameless dwarf miner one, you shall not be forgotten just because you''äll other wise end up arassing us all, y ou suck and you should otherise wheel bad even in death. I'll build a wooden mason s workshop in the dormitory hospital. There's so much wrong in that single sentence...
16th Obsidian 5:40: Why does late winter always come as a surprise? The spring was long as a year, but I alweays run out of time in the late winter!
Didnt that gyy die? Apparently there are no dwarves to memorpialise, so we survived the whole year without casualties. Yay?!
1st Granite, 5:46AM: Spring has arrived! I survied a year without anyone dying or me passing out! We havent piernced the aquifier, got no metal, and our only defences are the rivers around us, and our bridge is no draweridge, anyo ff them. I'd say I did good, in the sense that dwarvfes should survive the next year too.
6:01 Now that I finally ruled a whole year, my decree shall be that starting a project, small or major, requires taking a drink! I also request that the list of rules and dwarves to be dwarved be made more accessible somewhere.
The save is here. The game has been closed and restarted after each save, so there should e absolutey NO chance of corruptian as far asi can prevent it:
http://www.sendspace.com/file/7iw5er
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Topic: !!DRUNK FORTRESS!! [We Hath Become Death, the Destroyers of Worlds] (Read 1336050 times)