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Author Topic: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Werezombie Cloning Tech (What in Armok's name?!))  (Read 208133 times)

taptap

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #615 on: April 08, 2015, 03:13:07 am »

Congratulations on the success with fluffy. (Always was convinced, that working schemes would end up far less violent than most imagined.) Did you try normal wool (as opposed to hair) from shearing, looks like you arrived at the ram head wool in a convoluted way, kill ram, kill zombie head, butcher head, wool reanimates?

Staalo

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #616 on: April 08, 2015, 04:41:44 am »

Congratulations on the success with fluffy. (Always was convinced, that working schemes would end up far less violent than most imagined.) Did you try normal wool (as opposed to hair) from shearing, looks like you arrived at the ram head wool in a convoluted way, kill ram, kill zombie head, butcher head, wool reanimates?

Actually it went something like: shear ram -> necro animates wool -> children punch the wool to pieces -> necro animates head wool. And there's no shortage of violence, it's just... ineffectual violence, what with Fluffy being invulnerable and incapable of harming anyone.

I just noticed the refuse pile now contains Fluffy's nose wool, Fluffy's left ear wool and Fluffy's right ear wool. Looks like the students managed to do at least some damage at some point.
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taptap

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #617 on: April 08, 2015, 04:54:31 am »

Congratulations on the success with fluffy. (Always was convinced, that working schemes would end up far less violent than most imagined.) Did you try normal wool (as opposed to hair) from shearing, looks like you arrived at the ram head wool in a convoluted way, kill ram, kill zombie head, butcher head, wool reanimates?

Actually it went something like: shear ram -> necro animates wool -> children punch the wool to pieces -> necro animates head wool. And there's no shortage of violence, it's just... ineffectual violence, what with Fluffy being invulnerable and incapable of harming anyone.

I just noticed the refuse pile now contains Fluffy's nose wool, Fluffy's left ear wool and Fluffy's right ear wool. Looks like the students managed to do at least some damage at some point.

Ah, ok. (Didn't know wool grows a head and ears upon reanimation.) Wool pounding is non-violent enough for me.

BFEL

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #618 on: April 08, 2015, 05:29:19 pm »

Wool pounding? Oh god.

Anyway, has anyone ever figured out the mechanics/limits of the proposed magma mist fat melting thing?
Would be an interesting graduation ceremony, providing you could get the bastards to live through it. And then you make them vampires.
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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #619 on: April 09, 2015, 02:58:55 pm »

Decided to share that with one of my favorite Scottish authors, Charles Stross, figured he'd get a chuckle out of it at least, since the thread was a big mishmash of unfunny crud.
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miauw62

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #620 on: April 09, 2015, 03:22:11 pm »

Nevermind.
« Last Edit: April 09, 2015, 03:25:41 pm by miauw62 »
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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #621 on: April 09, 2015, 04:30:00 pm »

Decided to share that with one of my favorite Scottish authors, Charles Stross, figured he'd get a chuckle out of it at least, since the thread was a big mishmash of unfunny crud.

As it happens, that thread topic does interest me somewhat, for... reasons. Also a hearty nod for Banks references.

I now realize that "vigorous wool pounder" was indeed somewhat unfortunate choice of words... must be one of those "lost in translation" moments.

On child care department I have no new developments. Chasing a piece of animated fleece around proves the most efficient way to quickly develop unarmed combat skills but I haven't figured out how to train Discipline fast enough. I suspect it is needed to allow the students take on larger zombies; without it they'll just run away or let themselves to be freely maimed.

With current methods it's possible to train Fighter, Dodger, Armor user, Swimmer, Observer, Striker, Kicker and Biter to Legendary before adulthood. I'd really like to add Discipline to that list.

It could also be possible to train Misc. object user since students use their crutches to hit enemies but it would be tricky to arrange suitable crutch-requiring injuries without permanently crippling anyone. It would be interesting to see if the students could take down a bronze colossus using nothing but steel crutches, though.
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kingu

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #622 on: April 10, 2015, 05:16:23 am »

We still cant get them to wear armour right? Can we get them to barefoot on just one foot? if so It might be possible to use something from the old "dwarven special forces" thread where someone used weapontraps to selectively cut off a limb. (you really only need one foot right? :)) The hardest part would be to find a weapontrap/clothing combo that only damages the naked foot.
« Last Edit: April 10, 2015, 05:18:37 am by kingu »
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Naryar

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #623 on: April 10, 2015, 06:49:46 am »

...How do you call an undead made out of wool anyways ? A wool wraith ?

Ianflow

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #624 on: April 15, 2015, 11:15:13 am »

DISCLAIMER: Generally I find Kobolds to be the cutest thing in this game and adore them. I normally mod my game so I can have on embark a small group of kobolds accompany my dwarves.

Okay so one of the main issues with the first post was sentient death and a supply of victims volunteers

I've got the solution that is the result of attempting to breed kobolds.
If you're willing to modify the raws, you can go anywhere from a minor mod of not avoiding traps, to being common domestic pets with a value of 1.
Then have a Kobold Ghetto where they breed.

If you make their growth period small enough and clutch sizes large enough (in addition to a few genepools that can interbreed and prevent incest issues) you can have a steady supply of volunteers

Then all you need is

_ empty space ; w wall ; k kobold drop point ; g grate ; c ; child

To maximize the efficiency, it may be best to have a number of kobolds drop. Along with modifying raws so that all the kobold ghettos need is nest boxes and space. This meaning that they hunt vermin and additionally produce 6 eggs each. This allows with 4 ghettos an exhange of not only population (pasturing kobolds who are born as children in the other ghettos) exchange, but also 4 volunteers per mother per year.
There is a bit of startup work and that is to be expected. Around 30 or so Kobolds would be needed initially to ensure that breeding pairs can be set up. The use of honeymoon nests would be ideal, separate small pastures of 1x3 or 2x2 rooms for the kobolds. Ideally we'll get 3 pairs per ghetto, and once 3 pairs are established, the faulty remaining individuals can be escorted to the waiting room.
The waiting room is a lobby large enough to contain 10-20 kobolds. They will eventually be escorted to their appointment.

By having approximately 48 Kobolds who volunteer from birth we can supply anywhere from 4-16 children with kobold appointments. This varies depending on frequency, number of guests, and number of appointment rooms adjacent to the lucky child that gets visited.
Also there are 24 or so new children per generation. Parents who can no longer produce will be scheduled an appointment, and this also ensures that a large number of kobold eggs can be produced for special occassions where the child gets to play catch with kobold eggs.

Provided below is a simple diagram that maps out the busiest possible child.


More space between the appointment chambers and the child's cubicle may be needed, so that a cleaning bath is arranged with a hatch below finished appointments. Another option is a door at the back for someone to escort the kobold to a nice spot in the sun, or a relaxing nap somewhere quiet.

Above he child is a hatch to drop down peafowl and food. Peafowl could be modified so that they can be eaten right after dying, giving the child a method to dispose of their foe. Additionally, above the first hatch a few z levels up can be another one. This is where eggs are dropped down from harmlessly onto the child for a game of catch. Or puppies can be dropped so that they just don't care anymore.

A hatch below the child so that at adulthood they can go down.

I'm sure since the first post everyone has come up with much more advanced methods, but I hope this startup idea will help some.
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And thus, "The running of the goblins" became an annual tradition and the first dwarven contraceptive.
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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #625 on: April 18, 2015, 03:13:40 pm »

This is awesome...

Now if only I could make a fortress that actually survives....
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McDonald

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #626 on: May 24, 2015, 02:43:18 pm »

Are we still working on this? The show must go on!
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Oirestel

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #627 on: May 29, 2015, 05:31:06 pm »

Has !!SCIENCE!! been done on leg removal of dwarfs? ... Can they dodge without legs? Legendary Crutch User Legendary Dodger would be... funny as hell.
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Epicfaillord

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #628 on: May 29, 2015, 06:47:28 pm »

There are incest issues?
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taptap

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Re: Dwarven Child Care [Reboot] (Many Innocent Deaths)
« Reply #629 on: June 08, 2015, 06:17:57 am »

Has !!SCIENCE!! been done on leg removal of dwarfs? ... Can they dodge without legs? Legendary Crutch User Legendary Dodger would be... funny as hell.

Military training already maxes all relevant stats. Crutch walking brings no benefits to trained out dwarves. The crutch itself may be used as a weapon, but even a heavy crutch isn't in any way better than common weapons (even with the current broken system of handling impact damage).
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