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What is the next generic goal ?

Set up a contraband workshop for money
- 2 (15.4%)
Increase scouting coverage with zeppelins
- 6 (46.2%)
Raid a mansion
- 5 (38.5%)

Total Members Voted: 13


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Author Topic: X-PirateZ, Gal get punched in the face  (Read 112192 times)

Amperzand

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Re: X-piratez, RIP Doggy
« Reply #150 on: August 04, 2015, 03:17:10 am »

Y'know, it does make sense that it would be easier to get accurate with explosive weapons. Plus you have a lot of motivation not to shoot the wall in front of you.


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Muh FG--OOC Thread
Quote from: smirk
Quote from: Shadowlord
Is there a word that combines comedy with tragedy and farce?
Heiterverzweiflung. Not a legit German word so much as something a friend and I made up in German class once. "Carefree despair". When life is so fucked that you can't stop laughing.
http://www.collinsdictionary.com

Boltgun

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Re: X-piratez, RIP Doggy
« Reply #151 on: August 08, 2015, 03:34:24 am »

Okay, I am back from Japan, and the Color of Magic ended in a cliffhanger. Pirating will resume soon!

I'll submit a gal to be mutated.

Giselle Krauss. Reporting for duty. Give her anything with the moral equivalent of more dakka. The more bullets that fly, the more things are gonna die.

Here you go!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Succubus civ : Vanilla - Masterwork
Let's plays: Youtube - Piratez - Twitch

Darkening Kaos

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #152 on: August 08, 2015, 03:53:40 am »

     Welcome back.  Hope you had fun.
     We needz more axplosions......
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So! Failed to make peace, war looms, kill the infidels... what are our plans for the weekend?
The Giant Moles in the caverns of my current fort breed like crazy, even while regularly being decimated by other beasts entering them...

birdy51

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #153 on: August 08, 2015, 09:56:32 am »

Excellent! Though, she seems like a good fit for melee. If the opportunity arises where more melee is needed, I'd be alright with letting Giselle do some of that.
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BIRDS.

Also started a Let's Play, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duelists of the Roses

Rince Wind

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #154 on: August 08, 2015, 12:03:08 pm »

So envious! I want to go to Japan again as well!

Welcome back, hope you had a nice trip.
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Boltgun

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #155 on: August 08, 2015, 12:58:29 pm »

It was a great trip, I want to go back already.

Excellent! Though, she seems like a good fit for melee. If the opportunity arises where more melee is needed, I'd be alright with letting Giselle do some of that.

Okay, I finished July and you were doing well with autocanons. I finish writing the update mater today.
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Succubus civ : Vanilla - Masterwork
Let's plays: Youtube - Piratez - Twitch

StrawBarrel

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #156 on: August 08, 2015, 01:41:07 pm »

Kinda of old but,
Spoiler: R.I.P. (click to show/hide)
I think we need more dogs.
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RAM

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #157 on: August 08, 2015, 03:30:05 pm »

I have a bad feeling that something terrible will happen soon...
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Vote (1) for the Urist scale!
I shall be eternally happy. I shall be able to construct elf hunting giant mecha. Which can pour magma.
Urist has been forced to use a friend as fertilizer lately.
Read the First Post!

Boltgun

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #158 on: August 09, 2015, 05:14:37 pm »

The cave of booty got really hot during the summer so most of its inhabitants decided to degrade the concept of clothing from a staple rule of society into a friendly reminder. This made the prisoners more obedient, much to the gals surprise. Eve Jobs-sama herself would have liked to bring her crew to the nearby coast and enjoy the beach but a pirate’s job cannot afford vacations.

2 Jul 2601

A medium sized ship was spotted on the radar, and it was obviously too powerful for the Bonaventura to engage, yet the runt kept noting its direction and when it’s blip stopped moving on the scanner screen, the dropship took off with the greedy gals on board.

The outdoors were quickly secured, mainly thanks to Giselle Kraus shooting her LACC's explosive ammo in full auto, but the lack of galpower to take on the ship led Rince Wind to be pressured into moving inside with the raiders. The nervous gal tried staying behind her peers when a zealot sprang from ambush gave the snipergal a burst of his assault laser. Her teammate has sworn that, in her unconscious delirium, Rince Wind mumbled strange words, one after another. The gal interrupted her at her seventh one by pushing a vodka bottle in her mouth.

Rince Wind woke up and felt pain as if all her organs suddenly had a mind of their own and all of them were terrorized. She tried to scream but her lungs refused to act properly and all she could emit was a long ‘Hnnnnnng!’.


(Rince Wind does not get shot often but when she does, she ends with 1 HP)

Rince Wind screams of terror could be heard from time to time in the sick bay during the month.



3 Jul 2601

To everyone’s surprise, the heat did not rot the dinosaur carcass but instead dried it. It still took a lot of space in the vaults so the brainers took a chainsaw and autopsied it.



They did not learn much, besides that it did not breath fire as the gals on the field reported but instead used a rocket launcher mounted on its back. After this discovery, the gals could be more vigilant when they found themselves against another of these creatures.

Without much more to do with this, the runts cut the corpse apart and made dinosaur jerky. This brought ideas. Could better food be made in this dark world? Could haute cuisine rise back again from the ashes? Can the pirates make money out of this?

4 Jul 2601



Another ship from the Church of Xenu, is was shot, attacked, and pillaged as intended. The gals came back with a reverend on board and many flamethrowers. The religious sure love flamethrowers, but not as much as Darkening Kaos.



5 Jul 2601

The brainers had a look at those thick armor that the pirates brought back from a pogrom. This armor is simply incredible, it moves on its own and seals it’s user from harm like fire, smoke and mutant pirates.



There have to be a way they can recycle those for the gals to use, even if Eve Jobs-sama may not approve sealing a good looking gal into a bulky tin can.

6 Jul 2601

Another landing! Some swabbies did not survive this time but they were so clumsy that Eve Jobs was considering the idea to reduce recruits like those into slaves. She wished that they survived until she decided on the matter.



7 Jul 2601

Instead of reducing gals into slaves, the Big Boss had a better idea. The last landings brought some of the most difficult prisoners the runts ever had to handle. The church gals kept trying to hit their guards and escaping. They kept shouting that the pirates were fouls, and that the Star Gods would smite them and all kind of similar nice wills.



After tying one of the two church beastmaster, Eve Jobs could have a private chat with her. Hearing her praising the Star Gods at every sentence was a challenge for Eve Jobs-sama’s patience but she could understand better how she operates.



The chat then moved on her job, or rather what the pirates could learn from her and her colleagues. As hinted by her profession’s name, she took care of beasts given to her by the Star Gods and make sure they breed strong and obedient.

She went for an hour about her favorite beast, a great creature that apparently played a major part during the conquest of Earth. She explained in details the way it graciously moves, grabs with their powerful bodies and how they love to penetrate their mate wildly. Eve Jobs-sama figured that it would not be as erotic as this crazy woman is putting it. In her report she could not help but imagine what would be her reaction should one be brought home.



The beastmaster was also disrobed and her clothing was analyzed in the lab. The technology used to put a las gun in underwear was of great interest and the brainer could not help but imagine where they would put the muzzles should they make laser bikinis of their own design.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Eventually Eve Jobs-sama could not hear any more about these stabbing lobsters and had the captive dropped in the wild wishing her to commune with the monsters she loves so much.

10 July 2601

After seeing her colleague go, the other beastmaster was challenged by the pirate leader to a hand to hand combat. Should she win, she’ll be free. This was of course a plan from the pirates to learn a bit more about her and of course entertain themselves. The runts mixed dirt with water to create a small arena to fight in and bets were placed.

The church lady was surprised on the way to her combat to see a shrine dedicated to a dog, who apparently died against her church’s zealots. The fact that the mutant cared about their pets disturbed her.

The fight was close, Eve Jobs-sama was skilled but the beastmaster was quite ferocious on her own. Hours of grappling in the mud changed the beastmaster’s mind, she could imagine a new life of strife, fighting for her public’s amusement, she could prove her worth to the world instead of watching eggs grow. Her distraction caused her to lose against dirty tricks but she did not mind as she found that fighting in arenas was the life she always secretly wished to live.


(Image cropped because guess what)

Between this new business and the sale of excess ship part, wealth became really visible in the base. Many of this has been reinvested into new radars for the new bases and hangars.



13 Jul 2601

On their quest for battle gear, the brainers designed a gym underwear and replicated the Spartan camo vest.


Eve Jobs asked for a few gym suits created, for reasons unclear.

16 Jul 2601

The church sent another ship to the islands, Eve Jobs laughed at the persistence of these idiots to come and get plundered. This ship was small so the Bonaventura 'invited' it to land.

However the boss laugh was cut short when she realized that it was a trap. Guild guards opened fire at the Pirates. The gals fired back and proved to be more accurate and the combat quickly turned into their favor. Darkening Kaos was more than happy to empty her flamethrower at her foes.

So happy that she did not hear a frag grenade rolling at her feet.

Fatima Ann tried to warn her, but the explosion pushed her to the ground. Her next move will be really important and so Fatima analyzed the situation at incredible speed. She knew that the guild security are bad shots and that they only carry one grenade (fools). So she got on her feet and ran to the crater left behind and found Darkening Kaos bloodied body.

The gal may have terrible aim, but she had a good judgment. She quickly stopped the bleeding then threw her leader over her shoulder. Timing the shots flying over her head, she sprang from cover and ran back to the Bonaventura and put her body to safety.

Spoiler: Ouch (click to show/hide)

Eventually, the swabbies were able to finish the job. This sudden display of competence prompted Eve Jobs to give promotions. But at her whim, decided that Angel was more deserving. Most of her hands owe their life to her after all. Fatima Ann also gained some deserved fame, instead of infamy this time.





18 Jul 2601

After this ambush, the gals needed better means to kill the guild guards dead. And the flasks of acids were not up to the task. Most of the time the flash would end up broken far from their target, and when they did not, its damage was disapointing.

The brainers did their best to make better devices before realizing that there was a better way, why not shoot and melt the armor at once?

Acidic ammunition could be made for the smg, the blunderbuss and the domestic shotgun. Eve Jobs looked at the domestic shotguns available on the black market. Those weapons can shoot stunning pellets but because it sports a massive range issue, a gal with such a weapon may simply close the distance and punch her target. The blunderbuss on the other hand will ensure that guild armors are shredded along their owners thanks to their abilities to fire all their ammo at once.

(semi NSFW)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Updated weapon stats (click to show/hide)

The brainers also found some information about the crack. Judging from the poor state of addicts that could be interviewed in mutant settlements, it was concluded that this substance has no use for the pirates. After all, why escape this reality when you found the best life already? All the drug that was seized from the smugglers had been sent to the fence, good riddance.



20 Jul 2601

The large vault was completed, now the Cave of Booty can live up to it's name.



Another notable event is that a smuggler goon was handled by a couple of brainers and told them all her knew about the weapon Giselle used on the field. It's not as powerful as other wepaons of its kind but it's easy to handle.



[color 2601ge]21 Jul 2601[/color]

Eve Jobs already had a good grip on weaponry after spending the last months stealing all kind of deadly tools. Yet she want all of this info mapped, categorized. She want to be the most knowledgeable pirates when it came to end someone else's life. So, with the help of a lab assistant, she started writing down everything they know in a data disk. The objective would be to create the “Codex of Killing and Maiming” where a gal could find everything she need to know about guns… if she could read.



This also reminded her about the gauss pistol she had stocked in the vault, what strange weapons... She should search more about that.

This day was also the day the gals could see a long awaited upgrade. As Eve Jobs-sama already concluded, the TAC vest was a waste of hard earned carapace armor parts because it did nothing besides protecting from the front. And usually whatever jump in front of a gal did not have enough lifespan to do damage.

But the brainers finally designed a way to add more plates around the armor. It is slightly lighter than a warrior armor and more flattering to the gals curves, which is strangely a very important point for their captain. She ordered all the stocked armor part to be turned into suits for her most important gals.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

31 Jul 2601l

At the end of the month, the church of Xenu Sirius initiated a coordinated effort as organized cults are known to do. In all countries priests and reverend shouted their speech in front of a crowd that has been forcefully gathered. They excommunicated the Pirates and condemned them to death, claiming them to be abominations in the eyes of the Star Gods that must be purged by fire.

The slave maid kept massaging Eve Jobs-sama’s feet without daring to look up. Her mistress was watching the overreacting reverends on a stolen TV with a smirk of victory. She downed several church ships in the last weeks, stealing their precious flamethrowers, and these idiots only move was to make her and her gals a public figure.

Behind her, a representative from the mutant council stood. His unmoving sectoid eyes watched the scene, judging the right time to introduce himself. He reported that the mutant council was not scared of this, and instead spread the word about the pirates services to the communities, this helped the free mutant to connect the dots between the sudden disappearance of the church missionaries and this pompous event.

Eve Jobs-sama relaxed in her comfy stolen chair, pushing her feet further into the maid’s hands. She is no longer a small hit; surviving on petty crime. The various medias of the world now have her name and her gals are feared even in the most backwater town of Earth. Her secondary bases are near completion, her runts are building new ships, her gals are healing their wound and will soon be ready for more action and her brainers are now the wisest ladies the Earth even seen in the last six centuries. Life is good and is about to get better.



THAT SCORE!
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Succubus civ : Vanilla - Masterwork
Let's plays: Youtube - Piratez - Twitch

RAM

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #159 on: August 09, 2015, 05:45:36 pm »

I swear, it is all a ploy! I only did it so to secure my position! ... Ugh, I knew that something terrible would happen in this update, how can I face death after such an embarrassing display, I guess I will just have to beg forgiveness, maybe sacrifice a few rookies, maybe I will get lucky and Rincewind will run out in front again...
Sign Fatima-ann up for some acid ammo!
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Vote (1) for the Urist scale!
I shall be eternally happy. I shall be able to construct elf hunting giant mecha. Which can pour magma.
Urist has been forced to use a friend as fertilizer lately.
Read the First Post!

Taricus

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #160 on: August 09, 2015, 06:12:35 pm »

Snapper reporting for a tin can. And preferably a lot of dakka as well.
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We sided with the holocaust for a fucking +1 roll

Amperzand

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #161 on: August 09, 2015, 08:00:56 pm »

If giving me power armor along with my excess of high-explosives is feasible, I want. I want muchly.
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Muh FG--OOC Thread
Quote from: smirk
Quote from: Shadowlord
Is there a word that combines comedy with tragedy and farce?
Heiterverzweiflung. Not a legit German word so much as something a friend and I made up in German class once. "Carefree despair". When life is so fucked that you can't stop laughing.
http://www.collinsdictionary.com

Iituem

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #162 on: August 09, 2015, 08:17:06 pm »

Lorelle Harker, reporting for duty.  I'll take whatever role I'm most suited for.
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Let's Play Arcanum: Of Steamworks & Magic Obscura! - The adventures of Jack Hunt, gentleman rogue.

No slaughtering every man, woman and child we see just to teleport to the moon.

Darkening Kaos

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #163 on: August 09, 2015, 09:20:56 pm »

    Ouch!  What was the name of that interceptor that hit me?   Still, 75 days of lazing about beside the pool, drinking rum and vodka, and valiantly trying to lower the blood content of my alcohol system.....wait, what was I saying?  Eh, doesn't matter, yes barmaid, I will have another pint of rum and vodka.

    {Research: New Flying Craft, Armour - How have you organised the Brainers?}
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So! Failed to make peace, war looms, kill the infidels... what are our plans for the weekend?
The Giant Moles in the caverns of my current fort breed like crazy, even while regularly being decimated by other beasts entering them...

ATHATH

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Re: X-piratez, flintlocks and laser guns
« Reply #164 on: August 09, 2015, 09:44:45 pm »

My one question is this: Can we get Boom-Raptors on our side? That would be awesome.
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Seriously, ATHATH, we need to have an intervention about your death mug problem.
Quote
*slow clap* Well ATHATH congratulations. You managed to give the MC a mental breakdown before we even finished the first arc.
I didn't even read it first, I just saw it was ATHATH and noped it. Now that I read it x3 to noping
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