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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1014536 times)

Baffler

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4005 on: November 17, 2016, 01:39:02 pm »

I would like to mention that Poles were the first on the moon obviously. This, of course, wasn't so simple since Poland can't into space but apparently can into moon, but due to severe involvement of hellish powers and such. In any case, Twardowski was first and you can suck our ten-feet pole.

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severe involvement of hellish powers

What would Jan Paweł say?
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Kot

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4006 on: November 17, 2016, 01:41:06 pm »

I like cream cakes.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4007 on: November 17, 2016, 01:51:36 pm »

Everyone knows that the Europe was founded by the USA in 2341, when the advent of cheaply available time travel for the masses led to an existential crisis, and a Republican victory. The Swedes were an unfortunate byproduct.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Kot

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4008 on: November 17, 2016, 02:23:12 pm »

Swedes are nuclear waste.
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Rolepgeek

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4009 on: November 17, 2016, 02:32:26 pm »

Montrump Doctrine: All land on earth is to be kept free of hostile alien influence. Any and all measures necessary to ensure this are justified.

America rightful heirs to British Empire, Canada, Australia, India rightful American clay

Germany, Italy, Japan too
Poland still under USSR control if USA not intervene; new state of Poeland. France liberated by USA and British commonwealth, also American clay

China freed of Japan by American arms, South America already had America in name, Russia security risk, Africa to cure racism

Edit: Actually, read a book called 'The Art of Soviet Cooking'. Still haven't finished it yet but damn is it interesting. Ethnicity and foods and how the Soviet Union treated it's minorities based on the time.

(also Russia gives everyone equal opportunity to die for motherland)
« Last Edit: November 17, 2016, 02:34:28 pm by Rolepgeek »
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Kot

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4010 on: November 17, 2016, 03:11:29 pm »

Poland still under USSR control if USA not intervene; new state of Poeland.
Git the fuck out Clinton
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Silverthrone

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4011 on: November 17, 2016, 03:15:59 pm »

Swedes are nuclear waste.

And a green, glowing, crackling flood of it is is brewing, preparing to lap at the shores of the Baltic, overflow them, and scorch the lands beyond. Pouring from the heavens, burning and poisoning all that it strikes. One could call it a torrent. A Deluge, perhaps.  :P

Everyone knows that the Europe was founded by the USA in 2341, when the advent of cheaply available time travel for the masses led to an existential crisis, and a Republican victory. The Swedes were an unfortunate byproduct.

Real life Dragon Break confirmed. Bhutan, land of the Thunder Dragon, stood outside the circle, outside all that was and was not, at the same time. All clay is Bhutan.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4012 on: November 19, 2016, 11:34:10 am »

Poland has changed it's stateform from democracy to theorcratic monarchy.
This saturday, Jesus Christ has been officially crowned as King of Poland.

This was attempted twice before, in 1997, and in 2000, but at that time, the ceremony was not graced by the prescence of the prime minister, nor did it have the blessing of the Catholic Church. Now however, the prime minister was present, and the church has given it's official blessing to the ceremony. So Jesus is now King of Poland.

inb4 Deus vult

EDIT: the Bible may need to be revised, to see if everything Jesus said is politically correct. We all know how things you said in the past can haunt a head of state.
« Last Edit: November 19, 2016, 11:38:51 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

scriver

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4013 on: November 19, 2016, 11:38:08 am »

...Does that make Poland the bigger or lesser partner in a Personal Union with Judea?
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Sergarr

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4014 on: November 19, 2016, 11:48:35 am »

Poland has changed it's stateform from democracy to theorcratic monarchy.
This saturday, Jesus Christ has been officially crowned as King of Poland.

This was attempted twice before, in 1997, and in 2000, but at that time, the ceremony was not graced by the prescence of the prime minister, nor did it have the blessing of the Catholic Church. Now however, the prime minister was present, and the church has given it's official blessing to the ceremony. So Jesus is now King of Poland.

inb4 Deus vult

EDIT: the Bible may need to be revised, to see if everything Jesus said is politically correct. We all know how things you said in the past can haunt a head of state.
April 1st jokes should go on April 1st ;P
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._.

Kot

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4015 on: November 19, 2016, 11:59:12 am »

This isin't a joke though. This is an actual tradition in Poland. There's a reason this is a thing.
Remember, we once married Poland to Baltic sea. Like, for real.

...Does that make Poland the bigger or lesser partner in a Personal Union with Judea?
DEUS VULT!
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Silverthrone

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4016 on: November 19, 2016, 12:11:59 pm »

Well, shit, with Jesus on the throne... Glory to Poland, and the rightful King of Kings. I can think of worse rulers. Gott mit Uns.



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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4017 on: November 19, 2016, 05:32:12 pm »

April 1st jokes should go on April 1st ;P
That was my first reaction too.
But it's no joke.

I don't get it though. I thought Poland wanted less refugees / immigants. But now, they're likely to be flooded with millions of west-african catholics who want to live in the Kingdom of Jesus.
« Last Edit: November 19, 2016, 05:38:17 pm by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Kot

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4018 on: November 19, 2016, 05:54:38 pm »

I, for one, welcome our new Heavenly overlords.
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smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4019 on: November 19, 2016, 05:57:37 pm »

Poland has changed it's stateform from democracy to theorcratic monarchy.
This saturday, Jesus Christ has been officially crowned as King of Poland.

This was attempted twice before, in 1997, and in 2000, but at that time, the ceremony was not graced by the prescence of the prime minister, nor did it have the blessing of the Catholic Church. Now however, the prime minister was present, and the church has given it's official blessing to the ceremony. So Jesus is now King of Poland.

inb4 Deus vult

EDIT: the Bible may need to be revised, to see if everything Jesus said is politically correct. We all know how things you said in the past can haunt a head of state.

Maybe it's just me being an atheist (or just non-religious), but... huh?
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