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How fun is SPAMKINGDOM series?

Mind-bogglingly popular game series that you follow from early on and cannot stop, waiting for new installment like a drooling addict.
Long-runner soap opera you're too invested into to just stop watching it.
A fun little comic strip in the daily newspaper that's been around forever.
3/6
Who said it's fun? I didn't for sure.
I'm just waiting here for it to die horribly already so it will stop showing on my Unread Posts list.

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Author Topic: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Houlandin IV of Methiant-Cydwyl!  (Read 750170 times)

Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13920 on: August 13, 2018, 01:55:43 pm »

No benefit from all our artifacts or martial abilities when we fight against the inexplicable desire of the common uneducated soldiers to give their lives in service of a group of people far from their home that they have practically no contact with?

Okay.

Valid point for this loyalty check ;vc

Upped to a 3.
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Criptfeind

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13921 on: August 13, 2018, 01:57:13 pm »

I don't understand why there's a loyalty check at all. Why do our supposedly professional soldiers care at all about Parsia to the point where they want to rebel and die to protect it?
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13922 on: August 13, 2018, 02:00:13 pm »

I don't understand why there's a loyalty check at all. Why do our supposedly professional soldiers care at all about Parsia to the point where they want to rebel and die to protect it?

Because Imperial Authority is at -2 and Happiness is at 4 and people are generally unruly and willing to show it currently? ;v

You can't be viewed as 'terrible' Emperor and expect people will be 'yes men' in the same time.
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Basil ii

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13923 on: August 13, 2018, 02:00:44 pm »

I don't understand why there's a loyalty check at all. Why do our supposedly professional soldiers care at all about Parsia to the point where they want to rebel and die to protect it?
didn’t we also purge the corrupt and disloyal army members?.
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13924 on: August 13, 2018, 02:02:22 pm »

I don't understand why there's a loyalty check at all. Why do our supposedly professional soldiers care at all about Parsia to the point where they want to rebel and die to protect it?
didn’t we also purge the corrupt and disloyal army members?.

.<.

It's a four then and I've got to redo the text, gib a minute.
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

mightymushroom

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13925 on: August 13, 2018, 02:03:56 pm »

(A) Giving Haspen a minute

Maybe they had been told we had a treaty with Parsia, and didn't assume that no news was bad news in international relations. Certainly, from the event that spawned our mobilization, we can expect they were told they were marching against Sim.
« Last Edit: August 13, 2018, 02:09:38 pm by mightymushroom »
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Criptfeind

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13926 on: August 13, 2018, 02:05:13 pm »

Do we actually have any diplomatic agreements with Parsia? We have a Vizar with them that's done absolutely nothing in the 20 years he's been installed. But they aren't allies. They aren't even friends. We don't even like each other.

It just doesn't make sense that because we cheated on our wife our supposedly professional army decided to rebel because we decided we're not going to fight a big army. The result feels so disconnected from the action.
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Lord_lemonpie

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13927 on: August 13, 2018, 02:05:46 pm »

Praise be to Haspen, it's great to see a reasonable DM
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Basil ii

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13928 on: August 13, 2018, 02:06:29 pm »

Praise be to Haspen, it's great to see a reasonable DM
i agree praise be to him it rare to find a good gm
Also
(A) Giving Haspen a minute

Maybe they had been told we had treaties and agreements with Parsia, and didn't assume that no news was bad news in international relations. Certainly, from the event that spawned our mobilization, we can expect they were told they were marching against Sim.
this is somewhat weird when you think that most of our army men have come from villages that have prospered from our trade with Gupta.
« Last Edit: August 13, 2018, 02:09:14 pm by Basil ii »
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13929 on: August 13, 2018, 02:08:21 pm »

a
bbb
ccccc



You tell him that you believe Parsia is more trouble than help, and thus offer to split the land; Gubtans get what Gubtans want, while you take the rest.

Quote
6*

"Mahjar Sim would offer it himself if not for the fact he wasn't sure whether Methiant can be trusted, but now I can relay to him: indeed, the Methiantese are fellow warriors! Once we are done with purging rightful Simian lands out of the Parsian filth, I believe I could offer you services of my soldiers against the remainder of the Parsians. But we will see how the war progresses. Glory and prosperity to you and your descendants, o great Emperor Yoe of Methiant!" Ajarat Padarashka leaves at once, while you gather your officers and generals to pass the news. Confused, but only slightly disgruntled, they agree that this is for the best.

But soldiers are not dumb pawns! With the mood of the populace and your abyssmal authority, it doesn't take long before someone yells 'madman!' out of the crowd of the soldiers. Soon the situation turns sour, and your men start fighting!

Quote
4*

Fortunately, people loyal to you are large in numbers. Most importantly, only few of lower officers rise against you, the bulk of rebels made up of common soldiery and their immediate superiors.

Hundreds are already dead before the 'sides' are clear. You have advantage in numbers, and maybe, just maybe, it's not too late to safe those dumb souls from certain execution for rising against you.

A) Purge them. Purge them all!
B) They've gotta listen!
« Last Edit: August 13, 2018, 02:10:11 pm by Haspen »
Logged
SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Basil ii

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13930 on: August 13, 2018, 02:09:31 pm »

B second thought I don’t want a minor army hit.
« Last Edit: August 13, 2018, 02:54:28 pm by Basil ii »
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Maximum Spin

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13931 on: August 13, 2018, 02:09:49 pm »

B
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Hotfire90

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13932 on: August 13, 2018, 02:09:56 pm »

B
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mightymushroom

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13933 on: August 13, 2018, 02:12:44 pm »

B
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Criptfeind

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Yoe IV of Methiant!
« Reply #13934 on: August 13, 2018, 02:14:07 pm »

There's no way that an actual Methiant soldier would rebel in this situation. The only explanation that makes sense is that Parisa has been somehow infiltrating our army for decades (which would also explain why they never try to talk to us, they've been biding their time.)

So, lets purge em.

A
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