Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: 1 ... 780 781 [782]

Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 837288 times)

Maximum Spin

  • Bay Watcher
  • [OPPOSED_TO_LIFE] [GOES_TO_ELEVEN]
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11715 on: January 18, 2023, 06:54:49 pm »

I pity those societies that are so afraid of taboo that they actually keep track of the number of dick wiggles at a urinal
I'd just like to add that I've never heard of this and I think it sounds dumb, so calling it "American" is overly broad.
Logged
Reigning champion of deicide through politics.

martinuzz

  • Bay Watcher
  • High dwarf
    • View Profile
Logged
Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

Enjoy the freedom to explore the limits of your constraints

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Grim Portent

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11717 on: January 18, 2023, 07:53:50 pm »

It's widespread enough to have entered into several American comedy shows. Doesn't mean it's something pan-American or anything, but it means there's enough relevancy for it to hold traction as a joke.

If I were to hazard a guess it's probably something from Christian parents who don't want their kids to masturbate, like the hairy palms or going blind stuff.
Logged
There once was a dwarf in a cave,
who many would consider brave.
With a head like a block
he went out for a sock,
his ass I won't bother to save.

hector13

  • Bay Watcher
  • It’s shite being Scottish
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11718 on: January 18, 2023, 07:59:11 pm »

The first time I came across the concept was in a movie. A body swap thing in which Rob Schneider’s Trump character has their consciousness swapped with a high school cheerleader.

I believe there was a toilet attendant teaching the girl-in-Rob-Schneider’s-body how to pee, and said something along the lines “now shake it, but only do it twice. Otherwise you’re playing with it.”
Logged
Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

bloop_bleep

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11719 on: January 19, 2023, 03:04:32 am »

I have never heard this idea. But it seems like it is just a usual common sense thing. I am acutely aware of these things, unlike my friend, who stared blankly at a girl waiting for her to see him while inadvertently having his hand on top of his lap and bouncing his knee. Thankfully he knew the girl well enough to explain it.
Logged
Quote from: KittyTac
The closest thing Bay12 has to a flamewar is an argument over philosophy that slowly transitioned to an argument about quantum mechanics.
Quote from: thefriendlyhacker
The trick is to only make predictions semi-seriously.  That way, I don't have a 98% failure rate. I have a 98% sarcasm rate.

Loud Whispers

  • Bay Watcher
  • They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper.
    • View Profile
    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11720 on: January 19, 2023, 03:18:10 am »

Either that or you use the supreme helicopter technique

hector13

  • Bay Watcher
  • It’s shite being Scottish
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11721 on: January 19, 2023, 03:20:19 am »

Bonus points for helicopter noises.
Logged
Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

Loud Whispers

  • Bay Watcher
  • They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper.
    • View Profile
    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11722 on: January 19, 2023, 03:30:27 am »

You get crowned pub King if you have a mate on speaker phone directing you from mission control

"Gamma rho gamma, this is mission control, LZ is prepped you are clear for landing"
"In the pipe five by five mission control, initiating spin"
"THWUPTHWUPTHWUPTHWUP"

MorleyDev

  • Bay Watcher
  • "It is not enough for it to just work."
    • View Profile
    • MorleyDev
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11723 on: January 19, 2023, 11:30:33 am »

True champions reach below and give it a quick hoist to properly expel any trapped remnants.
Logged

Cyroth

  • Bay Watcher
  • [FABULOUS]
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11724 on: January 20, 2023, 03:26:27 am »

Ah yes, the good old gooch press.
Logged
Demons are preferable to ravens.
A noble just suffered a genuine unfortunate accident.
Has that ever happened before?

voliol

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
    • Website
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11725 on: January 25, 2023, 03:53:43 pm »

The Swedish right wing government just voted to keep the details of a new electricity price subsidy under strict secrecy for 20 years. After harsh criticism from the Council on Legislation, and all. I wonder who will take part of these subsidies, now that no one can fault the distribution for being strange and unfair? Perhaps friends of the government members? No, that couldn't be.

Blegh.

hector13

  • Bay Watcher
  • It’s shite being Scottish
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11726 on: January 25, 2023, 04:01:08 pm »

Is there a statute of limitations on corruption in government in Sweden?
Logged
Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

martinuzz

  • Bay Watcher
  • High dwarf
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11727 on: January 25, 2023, 04:12:08 pm »

Officially, no.
There is an unwritten rule though, that every government official that is about to commit an act of corruption, will first have to eat 100g of sürstromming, not just swallowing it whole, but actually chewing on it for a full minute.
This has worked remarkably well throughout the ages to keep corruption to a bare minimum in Sweden.

However, then came corona. A lot of people lost their sense of smell and taste. Corruption has never been as high in Sweden before.
Logged
Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

Enjoy the freedom to explore the limits of your constraints

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Loud Whispers

  • Bay Watcher
  • They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper.
    • View Profile
    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11728 on: January 27, 2023, 08:19:06 am »

Officially, no.
There is an unwritten rule though, that every government official that is about to commit an act of corruption, will first have to eat 100g of sürstromming, not just swallowing it whole, but actually chewing on it for a full minute.
This has worked remarkably well throughout the ages to keep corruption to a bare minimum in Sweden.

However, then came corona. A lot of people lost their sense of smell and taste. Corruption has never been as high in Sweden before.
Something is rotten in the state of Sweden

scriver

  • Bay Watcher
  • City streets ain't got much pity
    • View Profile
Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11729 on: January 27, 2023, 11:40:14 am »

In happier news the state secretary got caught fishing eels too slippery for his greedy mitts and had to resign today.
Logged
Love, scriver~
Pages: 1 ... 780 781 [782]