A Story of Adventure
An elderly dwarf sits on an oaken rocking chair, his grey beard draped down to the porch floor.
He takes a long drag from his short ivory pipe, then blows a ring of smoke out into the distance. He looks into the wilderness from his seat and speaks in a deep, gravely voice, ¨You want to hear a story, eh? Then a story you shall hear young elfling.¨
A young, pale skinned, white haired elf with bright blue eyes sits on the porch infront of the old dwarf, he sits with his legs crossed. ¨Please. My father says you have the best stories¨
The dwarf gives a hardy laugh, ¨Your father did always ask to hear my stories¨ He pushes his dark grey hair from his eyes to see.
His dark brown eyes looks deeply into the woods.
He begins,
One of my first adventures was in these woods. It was back when I was young and more active. I had been assigned along with some of my friends to take care of a pack of wolves who had been harassing the herder's sheep.
We traveled into the hills just outside the pasture where the sheep were kept. We found trails of blood and bones strewn about the side of the hill, we felt there was something more than wolves wandering about the hills.
I drew my sword in my right hand and my ax in my left hand, my friends drew their weapons as well.
We began looking around the hillside for a cave or some other place that wolves or other monsters could live, we found a large ere cave just near the peak of the hill.
We traveled inside the cave and immediately found a pile of sheep's bones laying on a bloody cave floor. We heard cackling and howling coming from the inside of the cave.
At that moment we knew that we would be dealing with more than just common wolves.
We began walking down the slope that lead deeper into the cave, a group of goblins raced up the slopes towards us. Herok, my friend, threw a ball of flames down into the group though it was ineffective. the rest of us charged towards them.
On the middle of the slope both our groups collided in clanking of bronze and sparks of steel.
Sven broke the arm of one that attempted to attack me as i drove my sword threw its chest killing it. The others followed in suit and we dispatched the group of goblins quickly.
We cleaned ourselves off and headed deeper into the cave and found a pack of vicious wolves chained up. Vicious as they may be Sterbin, the ranger of the group, was able to calm the beasts.
With tamed wolves in hand we headed back to town.
He looks back at the snow elf child, ¨And that is how we got a local canine unit for our police¨
The child looks slightly confused and asks,¨I thought you said it happened in those woods?¨ he points to where the old dwarf was looking.
The elderly dwarf looked where the kid was pointing,¨Well looks like you can look forward to another story then.¨
Check your punctuation, you're missing a lot.
The people who heard sheep are called shepherds.
'Travelled' is spelt incorrectly.
'Canine unit for our police' feels anachronistic.
Why are your speech marks ( " ") so small, anyway?
The actual locations are not described to any great extent. Neither is the time or weather. The characters also have a very barebones description. Basically, everything does.
Author
Topic: ___/The Writer's Apprenticeship\___ (Read 299900 times)