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Author Topic: Additional CIA japes [DPRK Thread]  (Read 515357 times)

miauw62

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #180 on: March 09, 2013, 03:46:02 am »

So what you're saying is that we should burn the house down?
With the lemons?
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Sir Finkus

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #181 on: March 09, 2013, 05:23:20 am »

For some comic relief, here's another statement put out by The KCNA on the same day.

Kim Jong Il's Loving Care for Women

Skyrunner

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #182 on: March 09, 2013, 05:43:12 am »

Can someone print-screen it for me? Korea blocks it thru the ISPs.
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Max White

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #183 on: March 09, 2013, 05:47:11 am »

Kim Jong Il's Loving Care for Women
Pyongyang, March 8 (KCNA) -- On International Women's Day, the Korean women are sorely missing leader Kim Jong Il, who had shown loving care for them in his lifetime.
Jong Yon Ok, management board chairwoman of the Yonan County Township Co-op Farm in South Hwanghae Province, told that Kim Jong Il was the benevolent father of all the people including the women.
Leader Kim Jong Il indicated the road for the women movement to follow in each period and stage of the revolution and wisely guided them to play a pivotal role in developing the country.
Whenever he met women during his field guidance, he highly appreciated their devoted service for the country and society and showed all sorts of solicitude for them.
In Juche 100 (2011) alone, the last year of his life, he personally met with a large number of women. Among them are cooks in Taehung Youth Hero Mine, called "Pyongyang girls", a biologist and a management board chairwoman, a weaver, a member of art groups of servicemen's families and an artiste.
The song "My Wife" and "Pomhyanggi"-trademarked cosmetics are representations of his loving care for the women.
With such warm love and deep trust, he trained the women to be true revolutionaries and heroes of the times.
That is why the Korean women have devoted all their wisdom and energies to building a prosperous and powerful socialist nation, true to his noble intention.

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #184 on: March 09, 2013, 06:28:43 am »

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #185 on: March 09, 2013, 10:09:10 am »

For some comic relief, here's another statement put out by The KCNA on the same day.

Kim Jong Il's Loving Care for Women
Can someone print-screen it for me? Korea blocks it thru the ISPs.
Here you go Sky.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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hemmingjay

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #186 on: March 09, 2013, 10:09:31 am »

Yeah, but we're a very lethal trip wire at the least. To quote my old man talking about his time in Germany, we'd die defending that line, but we'd tear them to shreds with us, and let everything that goes through be destroyed by the other services.

It's a damn weird world we live in, where I could end up doing essentially the same thing my father dead, in a tank design older than I, to continue a war that my grandfather was almost es drafted for.

I served at Casey, Castle, Hovey and also month long rotations on the DMZ with the ROK Army. Our life expectancy was measured in seconds in case of artillery. The monthly/weekly alarm drills at 3am served as a constant reminder of how fragile our existence there is. Out of the 28,000 soldiers stationed there, about 6500 are combat soldiers. Motorpools are likely first strike targets and estimated losses by private contractors hovered around 30% for the first 2 hours. The sole purpose of the US forces there is to harass and retard the ingress of NK troups along the only main artery. 1st Group SF works well with ROK Black Berets and 160th SOAR and I imagine they would hit enemy supply lines and fortified Artillery positions within 8 hours. If the port(the only deep water port in SK isn't nuked then 48 hours after another 3 regiments would be on the ground(2 Marine, 1 Army) from Okinawa, Guam and the Phillipines. Coastal shelling and airstrikes would be decimating the artillery and anti-aircraft emplacements. Large charges would be set off near the DMZ to collapse as many tunnels as possible(a favorite tactic of NK).
This is just one of many conservative estimates that are constantly speculated on.
Most likely it would be bloody 2-4 weeks followed by rapid cease-fire agreements. I also don't think NK has any intention of shelling civilian areas outside of collateral near the base in Seoul as they need the support of the people and theoretically the economic backbone in place.

Please note that I have not included Chinese involvement as it is always a great unknown. They have three choices, and the best one for us is if they do not get involved at all, lest we forget the Battle of Chipyong-ni

EDIT: I still place the odds of anything happening around 2-5% a day with odds decreasing daily.
« Last Edit: March 09, 2013, 10:24:00 am by hemmingjay »
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Felius

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #187 on: March 09, 2013, 04:37:16 pm »

For some comic relief, here's another statement put out by The KCNA on the same day.

Kim Jong Il's Loving Care for Women
Gotta love that site. The propaganda is so blatant it's unreal. If I didn't know about N.Korea and someone showed me a piece from there, I would seriously doubt it was actually a serious piece, and not some form of sick parody. Poe's Law is valid for political propaganda as well I guess... :P
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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #188 on: March 10, 2013, 08:23:35 am »

Yeah, I believe last year they discovered cold fusion and an energy drink that makes people younger.
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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #189 on: March 10, 2013, 08:46:33 am »

Yeah, I believe last year they discovered cold fusion and an energy drink that makes people younger.
Before or after the unicorn fossils.
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RedKing

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #190 on: March 10, 2013, 08:52:49 am »

Yeah, I believe last year they discovered Kim Jong Un invented cold fusion and an energy drink that makes people younger.
ftfy
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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #191 on: March 10, 2013, 09:13:16 am »

Yeah, I believe last year they discovered cold fusion and an energy drink that makes people younger.
If I recall correctly, North Korean "discoveries" happened when Kim Jong-il was still alive.

I wonder, why North Korean websites are blocked inside South Korea? Is the South Korean government so afraid of potential sympathisers?
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Frumple

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #192 on: March 10, 2013, 09:14:57 am »

Yeah, I believe last year they discovered Kim Jong Un invented cold fusion and an energy drink that makes people younger.
ftfy
No, no, discovered was the right verb. Ancient ruins, man. The god-kings of yesteryear had the best loot. Just a couple miles out from the unicorn lair and a few hundred feet from the unicron lair, which is why it took so long to find the unicorn one after digging up cold fusion and the elixir of life.
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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #193 on: March 10, 2013, 09:15:47 am »

Yeah, I believe last year they discovered cold fusion and an energy drink that makes people younger.
If I recall correctly, North Korean "discoveries" happened when Kim Jong-il was still alive.

I wonder, why North Korean websites are blocked inside South Korea? Is the South Korean government so afraid of potential sympathisers?
That or the 180,000 North Korean operatives roaming around Korea.

hemmingjay

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Re: North Korea Preparing For War
« Reply #194 on: March 10, 2013, 12:03:48 pm »

Yeah, I believe last year they discovered cold fusion and an energy drink that makes people younger.
If I recall correctly, North Korean "discoveries" happened when Kim Jong-il was still alive.

I wonder, why North Korean websites are blocked inside South Korea? Is the South Korean government so afraid of potential sympathisers?

They don't want the population exposed to delusional propoganda. An example is how they change stories about US soldiers to try to further their agenda to get US troops off the peninsula. There have been 3 official cases where rape charges have been brought against US soldiers in the last 10 years in South Korea. Only one was found to be a legitimate crime against a South Korean civilian. There have been several other incidents where claims were made and later the accuser has been found to be "influenced" by political and financial forces. The NK propoganda news service frequently reports that US soldiers ride around raping and shooting civilians and the law enforcement who tries to stop them are also gunned down. Considering how NK intentionally keeps it's people uneducated, it is likely that a large portion of their population believes most of the B.S. that NK spouts. I can post sources for examples of these crazy stories if anyone is doubtful.
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