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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1002166 times)

Vilanat

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2280 on: May 29, 2016, 11:24:06 am »

They should have added a law that says dubbing foreign content should be illegal. what's wrong with simple subtitles?
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Antsan

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2281 on: May 29, 2016, 11:28:26 am »

The attack on Wagenknecht was not because she said we shouldn't take in everyone (I am a bit surprised that people even think that somehow every European country can somehow take in every refugee at the same time – that's some serious magic right there), but because she was sympathetic to the idea of an upper limit.

Yeah, of course there is absolutely no difference between the two things, because all that talk about distribution of refugees throughout Europe is totally non-existent and generally all of this is totally straightforward in the first place, so I guess olololololo libprogresstards or something.

If you genuinely believe that Sheb, you may have forgotten what Europe we live in
Nah, it's you who have spent too much time reading meme and have forgotten how Eurocrats actually speak.
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Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2282 on: May 29, 2016, 11:33:08 am »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
I have always supported cultural enrichment

I mean, just read this press release to see what the Commission means by "promoting European cultural diversity". Spoiler alert, it's not the same thing as what memetic nativist usually talk about in their internet cesspools.

Take this for exemple:
Quote
Or take "The Faces Behind the Nose - Promoting Hospital Clowning as a Recognized Genre of Performing Arts". This project spans Austria, Croatia, Germany, Hungary, Slovakia and Slovenia. It focuses on training and exchanging artists for hospital clowningand it helps them to move to different locations and perform in countries other than their own.

Sure, it sounds like the worst waste of money ever devised, but it has nothing to do with replacing european population with dirty foreigners who aren't even white.
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Sergarr

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2283 on: May 29, 2016, 11:54:07 am »

Quote
Hospital Clowning
the more you know the more you wish you didn't know
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2284 on: May 29, 2016, 12:00:10 pm »

If you genuinely believe that Sheb, you may have forgotten what Europe we live in
Nah, it's you who have spent too much time reading meme and have forgotten how Eurocrats actually speak.
You have forgotten I choose to satirize cultural enrichment terminology explicitly on how Progressives speak Sheb, seems quite quaint how quickly you glossed over the requirement for video platforms to protect viewers from "irresponsible" "hatred."

Quote
Language serves as a useful measure of our diversity. Today, the European Union functions with 24 official languages, more than 60 regional and minority languages and more than 120 migrant languages. Since I am also the Commissioner responsible for multilingualism, allow me to say, with some pride, that the Tower of Babel still stands tall in 2014.
But of course all of this presents a challenge, and it lies in striking the right balance between the respect for cultural diversity and the construction of a shared European identity – an identity that does not replace the sense of national belonging, but adds a new layer to the multiple identities of our citizens. The search for this balance is part of what we call intercultural dialogue. It is an integral part of the European project, and it has been so right from the start.
Step by step, the European founding fathers – yes, we have borrowed the phrase from the United States – worked to build a community of people, and not only of states or administrations, in order to make peace an irreversible feature of Europe.

The Schuman Declaration in 1950 described this goal in precise words. Pooling the production of coal and steel was seen as “the leaven from which may grow a wider and deeper community”... the first concrete foundation of a European federation indispensable to the preservation of peace.”
Jean Monnet said it very clearly: we are not federating states, we are uniting people.
In 1992 the European Union's Maastricht Treaty introduced specific provisions on education and culture which have since become fields for EU action. The Treaty made clear that the EU should support cooperation among Member States but by no means replace national 'competences' or powers.
In the case of culture, the Treaty says that "the Union shall contribute to the flowering of the cultures of the Member States, while respecting their national and regional diversity and at the same time bringing the common cultural heritage to the fore".
Considering how far education and culture shape and define national identities, this was a radical step, and one which still occasionally causes surprise.
In education, such a breakthrough was in large measure due to the success of the Erasmus student exchange programme in promoting contacts between our people. By allowing students to get to know each other and develop cross-border relations and friendships, Erasmus greatly helped the creation of a European identity.
http://europa.eu/rapid/press-release_SPEECH-14-165_en.htm?locale=en

Sure, it sounds like the worst waste of money ever devised, but it has nothing to do with replacing european population with dirty foreigners who aren't even white.
It astounds me that no matter how many pages of thought I present I shall always be pigeonholed here.

Quote
If Europe’s big test in 2015 was the refugee crisis, integrating the newly arrived will be 2016’s. This will require the type of Wir schaffen das (we can do it) message that German chancellor Angela Merkel has been sending out. The refugee crisis has highlighted a historical fact: Europe’s cultural, ethnic and religious diversity will increase in a transformative way in the years and decades to come. Which makes it a good time also to open a healthier more cool-headed debate about our collective identity.

Sudden surges in migration pose a real challenge, but it’s worth remembering that we have been here before. Think of the huge population transfers after the world wars, or the arrival of immigrant workers in the 1950s and 60s – to France and Britain from former colonies, or to Germany from Turkey.

What is new is merely the pace of the inflow and the dramatic circumstances under which people are being driven to Europe. The underlying questions remain more or less the same, though: how to accept difference while upholding democratic governance and social standards. How to define national identities within a larger collective project of mutually shared values – key pillars of what Europe is supposed to be about.
Much is said about integrating new Muslim populations, and that question has become increasingly fraught by being unhelpfully conflated with the fear of terrorism. If we step back a little, it’s striking that the debate last year mostly focused on managing flows and obsessing about security. For some, the urgent human imperative was to save people from drowning at sea. For others, it was the xenophobic rush to put up fences and push families away with police dogs and truncheons. Europeans suddenly saw both the worst and the best in themselves and in their politicians.

But none of this fully addresses the longer-term issue of how a hopeful future can be built on the new diversity. Today around 7% of the European Union’s population was born outside the EU. More than a million refugees and migrants arrived in Europe in 2015, but that’s a tiny proportion – less than 0.2% – of the EU’s total population. Still, diversity will continue to increase in most European states because of the scale of the pressures driving people out of their homelands. As in the 19th century (the first globalisation), this current one is described as an age of migration – except that this time it isn’t flowing out of Europe (to the Americas) but to Europe (from the Middle East, Africa and Asia).

Diversity is dealt with in different ways across Europe. The British or German “multicultural” models are contrasted with the French “assimilationist” approach, but problems exist everywhere. Long admired for their open-arms policies, Scandinavian countries have started to rethink. Sweden has even brought in identity checks on travellers from Denmark.
http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2016/jan/05/europes-citizens-need-start-debate-diversity

I'm bored of this all, people asking me to defend those who give nothing worth defending. Inshallah m8s you won't be missed and the dialogue will finally be able to move on

Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2285 on: May 30, 2016, 03:12:34 am »

If you genuinely believe that Sheb, you may have forgotten what Europe we live in
Nah, it's you who have spent too much time reading meme and have forgotten how Eurocrats actually speak.
You have forgotten I choose to satirize cultural enrichment terminology explicitly on how Progressives speak Sheb, seems quite quaint how quickly you glossed over the requirement for video platforms to protect viewers from "irresponsible" "hatred."

Yeah, and your satire fail because you fail to understand how Eurocrats speak. Take that thing you quoted:

Quote
But of course all of this presents a challenge, and it lies in striking the right balance between the respect for cultural diversity and the construction of a shared European identity – an identity that does not replace the sense of national belonging, but adds a new layer to the multiple identities of our citizens. The search for this balance is part of what we call intercultural dialogue. It is an integral part of the European project, and it has been so right from the start.

The cultural diversity referred to is specifically the diversity of culture that already exist within the EU.

As for the think about hate speech, well, we shall see what it comes up to, but I'll agree it could be worrying.
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sprinkled chariot

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2286 on: May 30, 2016, 05:00:56 am »

Quote
Hospital Clowning
the more you know the more you wish you didn't know

Ill children getting some funny clowns is not that awful( unless statesman spends your money on that, and gets 80% of money in his pocket)
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Orange Wizard

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2287 on: May 30, 2016, 05:32:37 am »

Pretty sure there was a study done on hospital clowns that found they did much more harm than good.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2288 on: May 30, 2016, 08:58:07 am »

Yeah, and your satire fail because you fail to understand how Eurocrats speak. Take that thing you quoted:
Quote
But of course all of this presents a challenge, and it lies in striking the right balance between the respect for cultural diversity and the construction of a shared European identity – an identity that does not replace the sense of national belonging, but adds a new layer to the multiple identities of our citizens. The search for this balance is part of what we call intercultural dialogue. It is an integral part of the European project, and it has been so right from the start.
The cultural diversity referred to is specifically the diversity of culture that already exist within the EU.
As for the think about hate speech, well, we shall see what it comes up to, but I'll agree it could be worrying.
Hahaha you literally edited out the bit with the transformative migrant cultures, how you manage to look past reality is astounding

You know earlier how someone said people tend to focus on but one point of my points, then focus on one point to the exclusion of others within that to try and exploit a weakness without addressing any of my points? Well you've focused on cultural diversity, then tried switching track to homogenizing a European identity to migrant enrichment to cultural diversity all over again - ignoring it, a fucking mess of a way to address anything I said, especially since the point I was making was in regards to the EU proposing common speech regulation on all media platforms.

Whatever though, we can talk about cultural enrichment all over again. Do you want to go back to the ESI's cultural enrichment or the Bundestag's cultural enrichment or the Commission's cultural enrichment?
Did you sincerely take Eurocrats' word for it at face value when they first talked of multicultural experiments or cultural enrichment?

I guess fuck free speech if no one wants to even talk about that. Always white people this, white people that, first thing you focused on Sheb was cultural enrichment even though it was two pages of the EU proposing "common" speech regulation. Cannot stress this further enough. You need some enrichment m8, you're too focused on preserving whiteness

Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2289 on: May 30, 2016, 09:29:35 am »

That part about transformative migrant culture is from an unrelated Guardian columnist.

You point a EU Commission document which state that it want to protect European cultural diversity and prevent hate speech. I point out that in Eurojargon, protecting European cultural diversity doesn't mean whatever the hell you mean by cultural enrichment in your echo chamber, but that it means letting the states protect their cultural industry. I support my point by providing other press release speaking of cultural diversity, where it's clear the use has nothing to do with immigration. (Plus, I really liked that quote about hospital clowns).

You counter by providing two quotes. One from a member of the Commission, where diversity is used in the Eurojargon meaning (preserving national and regional culture by allowing protectionism in these areas), and one by some Guardian columnist that use it differently.

Since my argument was about the way European commission officials use the words "European cultural diversity", the quote from the journalist's op-ed is irrelevant, so I didn't address it.

Now, if you want to talk about how the commission's update to its regulation is a threat to free speech, why not. But then, why are you just posting a screenshot of a press release and commenting "I always supported cultural enrichment"?
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Sinistar

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2290 on: May 30, 2016, 02:46:00 pm »

You know, this current topic is kinda of interest to me and I'd gladly join discussion but it's late and I'm tired. So here's a plea to everyone not to try and suddenly start throwing too much random unrelated shit around that would cause the thread to get locked until I get back tomorrow. There will be cakes if you behave!
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2291 on: May 30, 2016, 03:50:15 pm »

That part about transformative migrant culture is from an unrelated Guardian columnist.
You're the one who keeps saying it's Eurocrats, I'm the one saying it's progressive, are we even talking about the same thing? No, of course not. You keep talking past me, the simple matter of the fact is that Europe has just been massively culturally enriched and this is a source of amusement for me. Unless of course you want to deny how enriched the EU is - of course given that 120 migrant languages are recognized here, I think that's a poor argument to make. Transformative change is upon you whether it's spoken by the Guardian or Volksrant. Or me for that matter. Heck, Merkel gave me that lovely quote about how Germoney is losing her social core. So many nice words! :D

You point a EU Commission document which state that it want to protect European cultural diversity and prevent hate speech. I point out that in Eurojargon, protecting European cultural diversity doesn't mean whatever the hell you mean by cultural enrichment in your echo chamber, but that it means letting the states protect their cultural industry. I support my point by providing other press release speaking of cultural diversity, where it's clear the use has nothing to do with immigration. (Plus, I really liked that quote about hospital clowns).
Is Bay12 an echo chamber? Curious, as this is the only place where I use the term cultural enrichment. This is not jargon, these are euphemisms, just as harmonizing and enrichment are. It is the paradoxical process in which cultural diversity is enforced through a common regulation, a same uniform policy enforced against all European cultures for the sake of diversity which you are ignoring, because you are so focused on xenophobia and brown people that you are incapable of thinking in any other frame of mind. It is not about protecting European cultural diversity - or else they would not be regulated and controlled according to a uniform standard dictated by the European Union, it is once more about centralizing power. It is not about preventing 'hate speech,' but about punishing those who speak it by their definitions of hate across all media platforms - against once more immense power, which we have seen used in the Netherlands to punish those who shatpost about cultural enrichment. Both tools will be used to enforce the EU's popularity once more; we have seen how this was done in academia to create a European identity where once everyone had their own and how history itself was rewritten to create one European people. So now they propose a common cultural regulation to 'protect' European cultural diversity, by their definition of European which obviously places the European Union above diversity, and gives itself the power to punish and silence those it deems hateful with no oversight, even if it means using means of copyright to do so.
Though obviously none of that matters, because it's all about white people right? Honestly Sheb? Not even English, French, Germans, Poles, Italians e.t.c., they're all just white? That's not very diverse. In case I haven't made this clear enough even though it seems I joke about it more than enough, I'm not white, have no loyalty to skin pigmentation and far from worshiping Swedish phenotype carriers I find them a sad source of humour, standing for most all that destroys an idle and prosperous civilization. Barring the more unambitious taharrush lads, cultural enrichment brings with it new opportunities to erase the mistakes of whites past, and perhaps allow us to finally move past their insanity once they're taken down a peg.

You counter by providing two quotes. One from a member of the Commission, where diversity is used in the Eurojargon meaning (preserving national and regional culture by allowing protectionism in these areas), and one by some Guardian columnist that use it differently.
Quote
But of course all of this presents a challenge, and it lies in striking the right balance between the respect for cultural diversity and the construction of a shared European identity – an identity that does not replace the sense of national belonging, but adds a new layer to the multiple identities of our citizens. The search for this balance is part of what we call intercultural dialogue. It is an integral part of the European project, and it has been so right from the start.
Step by step, the European founding fathers – yes, we have borrowed the phrase from the United States – worked to build a community of people, and not only of states or administrations, in order to make peace an irreversible feature of Europe.
I don't know what this means to you, but this is not protectionism a la France le fromage, this is called assimilation.

Since my argument was about the way European commission officials use the words "European cultural diversity", the quote from the journalist's op-ed is irrelevant, so I didn't address it.
Well your argument is entirely irrelevant to everything I said and I still gave you the courtesy of a reply.

Now, if you want to talk about how the commission's update to its regulation is a threat to free speech, why not. But then, why are you just posting a screenshot of a press release and commenting "I always supported cultural enrichment"?
Because it's a self-effacing joke on how the EU regulating media platforms to ensure friendly and safe environments conducive to their agenda means all including myself will have to watch their tones and messages. The joke being the EU supports cultural enrichment, I support cultural enrichment and have always done so - thus the EU has no qualm with me and will not strike me with their common regulation. Underlined are the areas of concern that are friendly ways of saying seize control of media platforms and find as many mechanisms capable of controlling narratives and punishing individuals for speech we find dangerous. I assumed people would be able to read the press release and form their own judgements including those on the points underlined, as Bay12 is full of intellectuals and other shit.
These are my thought processes and for the terrible jokes thread, be it drier than the Sahara desert :|

You know, this current topic is kinda of interest to me and I'd gladly join discussion but it's late and I'm tired. So here's a plea to everyone not to try and suddenly start throwing too much random unrelated shit around that would cause the thread to get locked until I get back tomorrow. There will be cakes if you behave!
Well, the thread's tone has gotten deadly serious - one wonders if this is an improvement.

Also general question to this thread's denizens, what do you all think of multilateralism?

*EDIT
I should also add, if I seem particularly bothersome, whilst writing this post I had a horrendous headache due to eating a curry which had half the day's salt intake in it. Was not a smart move on my part, and has probably taken a day off of my lifespan.
« Last Edit: May 30, 2016, 03:53:04 pm by Loud Whispers »
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Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2292 on: May 31, 2016, 04:25:59 am »

Sorry, should have included that bant about not even white, seems to have triggered you. Nah, really, I shouldn't have.

But yeah, if you were more concerned about the hate speech enforcement part of the press release, you made a terrible job of making that clear. Because, well, as far as the use of diversity in that press release, I was right.

Quote
Quote from: Sheb on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
You counter by providing two quotes. One from a member of the Commission, where diversity is used in the Eurojargon meaning (preserving national and regional culture by allowing protectionism in these areas), and one by some Guardian columnist that use it differently.
Quote
But of course all of this presents a challenge, and it lies in striking the right balance between the respect for cultural diversity and the construction of a shared European identity – an identity that does not replace the sense of national belonging, but adds a new layer to the multiple identities of our citizens. The search for this balance is part of what we call intercultural dialogue. It is an integral part of the European project, and it has been so right from the start.
Step by step, the European founding fathers – yes, we have borrowed the phrase from the United States – worked to build a community of people, and not only of states or administrations, in order to make peace an irreversible feature of Europe.
I don't know what this means to you, but this is not protectionism a la France le fromage, this is called assimilation.

The Commission put out a "fact sheet" along its press release. Cultural diversity shows up in the "How is European culture strengthened by the new Directive?" part, which concern the Commission's proposal to impose a 20% quota for European content in video-on-demand services.

Quote
Overall, strengthening the promotion of European works for on-demand services will lead to a broader and more diverse offer for Europeans. This will have a positive impact on cultural diversity and bring more opportunities for European creators.

So yeah, it is protectionism ŕ la French cheese.

Now, if your concern was about the hate speech enforcement... Well, there is absolutely no detail, but that part "On top of industry self-regulation, national audiovisual regulators will have the power to enforce the rules, which depending on national legislation, can also lead to fines." doesn't make it sound that threatening. Let the industry self-regulate or let the states deal with it? Well, I can feel Juncker's Jolly Jackboot on my neck already.
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scriver

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2293 on: May 31, 2016, 05:18:41 am »

20% "European" content. It'll end up being 30% British, 30% French, 30% German, and 10% Latin, no doubt.

Such a great way to promote cultural diversity.
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Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #2294 on: May 31, 2016, 05:25:40 am »

That doesn't stop individual member state from imposing quota of national content like many already do.
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.
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