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Author Topic: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Epilogue B  (Read 192577 times)

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #870 on: September 22, 2019, 03:18:38 am »

"Why the MPMH did I picture a Demon General like some intimidating figure after all I saw? There truly is no hope, but I suppose this makes our job easier."
Jarvis twitched on his place the moment she mentioned the Great Wiggler and pointed his finger right at the rest of the group.
"HAH! I told you MPMH Great Wiggler was real! And hopefully the Wigglerpocalypse will happen soon too!"
Even if she mentioned something that was of his interest, that didn't stop him from correcting her and pointing out the issue on mentioning Revivian things.
"And our mighty Great Wiggler is not weird, you are MPPHM spending this whole time with these weird Revivian things...Which does lead to another topic I must speak about."
The soldier inclined his head forward to whisper just to make sure she was the only one going to hear it.
"Don't talk about Revivian MPMHPM near that weirdo, unless you want to make things really, really awkward. Seriously, it is for your MPMH good and my sanity too."
Jarvis turned his attention to Serena for a moment and gave a shrug in response.
"She didn't do anything wrong, she is just well...You MPMH, she is lazy. As absurd as it is for me to say this...Her title doesn't mean much when she is clearly just MPMPHM her time down here."

Empiricist

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #871 on: September 22, 2019, 03:21:58 am »

"I am unaware of how your communications channels function, but if it is an item or some such perhaps they are able to track it?"
"At any rate, are you able to make your escape? If need be I would not mind being of assistance in that case."
"As I see it, leaving you unperturbed would be best for us all. I'm sure we could come to some mutually beneficial arrangement on top of that anyhow."
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Quote from: Caellath (on Discord)
<Caellath>: Emp is the hero we don't need, deserve or want

IamanElfCollaborator

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #872 on: September 22, 2019, 03:31:25 am »

Belphegor shrugs at Jarvis.
"Well, I wouldn't say that we're not intimidating. I could still incinerate you all with demonic light if I really wanted to. But one, that takes effort and therefore isn't worth doing, and two, why would I do that? You haven't tried to kill me -yet- and we're all just standing around chatting. Now Mammon and Leviathan, they're the ones to worry about. Unlike most of us, they're actually serious about wanting to wipe you mortals out."
"Well, yeah, of course the Great Wiggler's real, she's been around since forever. We don't know where that Wiggler came from either, so don't ask; Lucifer will claim he created her but please. Why do you think I'm calling you weird for worshipping her? It's like worshipping that weirdo goddess you have with you. Never meet your heroes and all that."
"Yeah? Well, unlike you, I don't work for Hellrealm and evil people! This is clearly a ruse for her to get us to let our guard down, Jarvis! I thought you were supposed to be the cautious one!"
"No, that ruse, you smacked around like a ragdoll and cost me like five hundred rhea to get fixed."

"I am unaware of how your communications channels function, but if it is an item or some such perhaps they are able to track it?"
"At any rate, are you able to make your escape? If need be I would not mind being of assistance in that case."
"As I see it, leaving you unperturbed would be best for us all. I'm sure we could come to some mutually beneficial arrangement on top of that anyhow."
"Alright. What do you have in mind? If you want me to take down my part of the barrier around Ultima, I'll do that if you keep Mammon off my back. Anything else? Intel, money, Clash of Legends summon tickets? I got plenty of connections and cash, I can get away easy. Still, it's a pain in the ass."
« Last Edit: September 22, 2019, 03:41:24 am by IamanElfCollaborator »
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Empiricist

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #873 on: September 22, 2019, 03:37:46 am »

"Barrier, intelligence, and the rest in that order."
"I am sure we will all be happy to negotiate a price we can all agree."
"Some of us more enthusiastically than others."
She nods at KingCringeSon.
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Quote from: Caellath (on Discord)
<Caellath>: Emp is the hero we don't need, deserve or want

Powder Miner

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #874 on: September 22, 2019, 03:41:04 am »

Asuna had three things to say.

To Jarvis: :"Hikkikomori is a Japanese term for someone who stays shut in their house all the time. NEET means Not in Education, Employment, or Training. HikkiNEET is both. I guess she’s just a Hikki though."

To Yliss: :"Wait, wait, okay, I know it’s not super important right now, but... hundreds of rhea a month? God damn, girl, you have got the whale baaaad.."

To Belphegor:  :"Okay, so, before the maid says something stupid about servants or masters or, like, napalm to set herself on fire with or something —oh she didn’t say that— the fact that we ran into you probably means we’re fucking doomed to run into at least one more Demon General, so... I guess any tips on who we’re next likely to run into on the whole adventurer path? And, uh, tips maybe on how to not die horrifically to them or Mammon?"
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Praefectus Screptum

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #875 on: September 22, 2019, 03:43:16 am »

"The fact you MPMH do such things is even more offensive. But I don't know what to expect at this point, after all the things I saw in  such a small amount of time. At this point I expect the next big demon we encounter to be a guy MPMH literally eats books and paint the walls of his castle with his forehead."
"That MPMH didn't create my goddess! If there's a weirdo in this situation, it is Lucifer for saying something absurd like that. And if you know her so well...Can I have like her number for one of those MPMH things you MPMHs carry around?"
"Serena, being dense like a brick is Keith's thing, so stop MMPHM and at least try to behave. That's a good offer you have going there, we may be willing to assist you. If we faked  your death, would they MMPH? I mean, at this point they probably don't think you are capable of much, right?"

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #876 on: September 22, 2019, 03:59:18 am »

"I'm going to pretend you didn't just insult my hobbies and instead answer your next question; she's old fashioned and doesn't have a tablet. Also, reception's terrible underground. Sorry, pal."
"Alright, now for intel. I promised you that. Let me give you the rundown- oh, and don't bother telling the authorities; they won't believe you, given I'm your only source of intel and they're not going to believe you got told by the Demon Generals about their plan."
"I was supposed to be here, bribing people to stop adventurers from passing. Which I didn't; too much effort. Lucifer's in Bastapa, destabiising the voting system, and therefore is probably screwing like five succubi at once instead. That tryhard Satan is in Wybernia, doing whatever the hell he does, which he'll inevitably screw up because he'll flip a table whenever something goes wrong. Asmodeus is in Midgardia, where she's got the most pull; thing about being the Queen of Succubi, you really get a lot of pull at dream brothels. Beelzebub? Nobody's seen him for five months, but they're in Blobbonia, probably snacking on Cocoa Beetles. Leviathan's in Kaisei and Mammon's in Penultia, so good luck with those two."
"As for tips as to how to not die horribly? Uh, don't die. Sorry, best I can do for you in that department. Still, they're all about as competent as Miss Goddess of Water over here, so you should be fine. Except Mammon and Leviathan. Yeah, like I said, good luck."
« Last Edit: September 22, 2019, 08:35:57 am by IamanElfCollaborator »
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Praefectus Screptum

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #877 on: September 22, 2019, 04:13:41 am »

"MMMPHMPMHP! So close and yet so far! MMPPMHPMHPM!"
"MPMH, this is really unfortunate. Don't you at least have like a map or MPMH that might help me to find her?"
As hopeful as Jarvis was, he still paid attention to the information she was willing to provide them with, only to move a hand under his chin pondering before giving a nod.
"Well then, at least now MPMMH know what they are up to and where to find them. NOW as I know we got no chance to MPMH them at this current condition-And no Keith, believing in yourself, heart or whatever won't work-Do you know where we could sharpen our combat skills?"
"Be it like places where we can brawl MPPMH places with these incompetent demons. You know, so we can prepare for this MPMH, instead of just waltzing in to die."

kj1225

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #878 on: September 22, 2019, 04:15:11 am »

Keilee politely raises her hand to ask her question.
"Number one, do you know where payments for the adventurer's guild are? Number two, you've been here for a bit right? You know anything juicy going on? Like interesting secrets, locations of spare jewlery, stuff like that? Just in case we need to deal with another road block here..."
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SirAston

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #879 on: September 22, 2019, 04:16:46 am »

"Oh hell, it's a Revivian. Wait. Wait a second. I know you."
"You're that chick who dumps hundreds of rhea every month whenever an Asteria alt comes out on Clash of Legends! KingCringeSon or whatever. Yeah."
  "Precisely. It is good to see that I am reckognized. Then again, as it was in my previous life, it is only natural, only destiny, for people to reckognize the name, power and influence of..."
"KING CRINGESON!"
  "... I'm so happy right now... This username has influence over even this crappy realm... I should find a way to make videos and do manga reviews again, like old times..."

:"Wait, wait, okay, I know it’s not super important right now, but... hundreds of rhea a month? God damn, girl, you have got the whale baaaad.."

"There's nothing else to do in this land! The manga artists in Kaisei are far from being above Doujinshi level, so I refuse to pay more than ten rhea for an entire volume, plus the plots are so shitty, I bet I could take any random book from Belphegor's collection and predict half of the plot just with that!
There are no anime, no other video games, nothing of value. The other alternative would be going to the pub every evening and get wasted. I consider that to be unhealthy!"
"[...]Lucifer's in Bastapa, destabiising the voting system, and therefore is probably screwing like five succubi at once instead[...]"

"[...]Asmodeus is in Midgardia, where she's got the most pull; thing about being the Queen of Succubi, you really get a lot of pull at dream brothels.[...]"
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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #880 on: September 22, 2019, 04:21:07 am »

"She shows up when she pleases and where she pleases; she's a free spirit like that. Last time I saw her, she was in.....Midgardia, yeah, Midgardia. I don't know if she's still there, she moves around. Good luck finding your goddess, though. As for training?"
"Listen, man. If you wait too long, Mammon and Leviathan will probably figure out the rest of us aren't doing our jobs right and take over and finish this whole job in about a week. And then Generia's screwed and I lose my customer base because you mortals are damn whales and make me rich. So, go on your way, beat up demons, get stronger and figure it out from there."
Keilee politely raises her hand to ask her question.
"Number one, do you know where payments for the adventurer's guild are? Number two, you've been here for a bit right? You know anything juicy going on? Like interesting secrets, locations of spare jewlery, stuff like that? Just in case we need to deal with another road block here..."
"Payments? That idiot old man I bribed to let me in here was supposed to pay them. I guess he must have gone on vacation with the money. Okay, I'll sign some checks, forge some signatures and those guys'll get paid. The King's coming back in a day from his honeymoon with his MILF of a wife, so I gotta bail anyway."

Then Yliss speaks.
"No, you're just one of my best customers. After all, I am the Guild of Trisitia."
« Last Edit: September 22, 2019, 04:27:54 am by IamanElfCollaborator »
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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #881 on: September 22, 2019, 04:30:19 am »

"...Truly a graceful goddess. Hopefully I will find her MPPMH, gonna keep my eyes open and make sure I don't miss any Wigglers on the ground. Perhaps they can lead me to her."
"Who the HMPMH is talking about waiting? I just want to make sure we won't just get there and die horribly. So yes, if you know where we can MPMPMH more demons, tell us. You know, groups that aren't CLOSE to the big baddies."
"MMPMH. Yeah, I can see how you can get rich when we have MPMH spending so much in a month."


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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #882 on: September 22, 2019, 04:37:00 am »

"Entertainment's a growing industry, man. You should invest in the Guild and give it a year and you'll make more money than most adventurers do in three."
"And what I mean to say is that you don't have time to stick around and train a little bit. All the demons? They'll be right next to their bosses. You want to fight the demons? You're going to have to face them with their generals. The best opportunity you got to hit them is now, or in the next month or three, while the iron's hot. Your hothead puroresu friend is right, you gotta rush in while they're scattered around Generia. Unless you want to level-grind on tiny monsters until you feel like you're ready."
« Last Edit: September 22, 2019, 04:44:28 am by IamanElfCollaborator »
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SirAston

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #883 on: September 22, 2019, 04:37:39 am »

"No, you're just one of my best customers. After all, I am the Guild of Trisitia."
"In that case, I have about a million complaints about Clash of Legends. It's a crappy game that only serves for titillation and turning people, especially children and teenagers, into gambling addicts. As the creator of the game, I hold you accountable for these irredeemable sins and demand compensation for your lack of transparency, over-reliance on flashy effect to sell what basically amounts to pretty pictures and yada yada yada."
"Aaaaand I just remembered you're a Demon General, so you don't give a shit."
"..."
"Give me significant lifetime perks for all your current and future games and I won't tell people the Guild consists of a single Demon screwing over humankind. People knowing that would be a lot of stress to deal with, wouldn't it?"
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IamanElfCollaborator

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Re: FEF: Wonderful Blessing IC Thread: Chapter 1: {A Crap Re;Zero Reference}
« Reply #884 on: September 22, 2019, 04:43:30 am »

"One, that's bullshit. If you hated it so much, we wouldn't have you pinned on our wall for "Star Customer of the Month" every month over in the corporate office in Kaisei. Seriously, you, the Goddess over there and this weirdo in Wybernia are like, the top three."
"N-nobody needs to know that, d-demon!"
"Two, I have excellent PR and even better lawyers. I'd have that accusation swept away in about a day. What, do you think I pay those morons who everyone else thinks is the Guild for nothing?"
"So. Daily Summoning Seals and weekly free tenfold summons and we'll call it even. And that's only for getting rid of those killjoys trying to find me earlier."
« Last Edit: September 22, 2019, 04:47:32 am by IamanElfCollaborator »
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