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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2130758 times)

FuzzyDoom

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3735 on: January 29, 2011, 08:10:53 pm »

My Baron just requested slade goods...

Pull the Anti-Baron lever?
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Also bear in mind that dwarves have their heads at a perfect height for a good face-kicking.
That's the great thing about this forum. We can derail any discussion into any other topic.

MythagoWoods

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3736 on: January 29, 2011, 08:17:13 pm »

It's on my to-do list right after I get back from work.  Or, if I don't want to build an execution lever, what would happen if I dropped granite on him from a few Z-levels up while he sleeps?
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My cows are war trainable. BEWARE THE BATTLE CATTLE!

Maynot

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3737 on: January 29, 2011, 09:46:34 pm »

Dropping stuff on them will only work with a cave-in situation.  Dumping items won't cause that.

Anyway, I have medical dwarves that have every other task disabled other than the Health Care tags and they still sit around with 'No Job' while the infirmary fills with wounded.  I also don't have any active burrows.

Also the medical dwarves go running to the stockpile for thread and cloth instead of using the supplies in the hospital.
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xtank5

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3738 on: January 29, 2011, 10:34:25 pm »

Anyway, I have medical dwarves that have every other task disabled other than the Health Care tags and they still sit around with 'No Job' while the infirmary fills with wounded.  I also don't have any active burrows.

Also the medical dwarves go running to the stockpile for thread and cloth instead of using the supplies in the hospital.
It sounds like you need to make the hospital an actual hospital zone. Save first because making zones is a little buggy and can crash if you try to cancel mid-designation.  See here for more helpful information. 
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Leonard DeVir

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3739 on: January 30, 2011, 08:22:16 am »

Oh nice, dwarven alcohol now makes my miners more clever! *designates wide area for channeling* Ah, the joy of watching them not killing each other and themselves...
WAIT YOU ARE ON THE WRONG SI-
"A section of the cavern has collapsed!"
"Urist McSuicide has suffocated to death."

Sigh.
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henkalv

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3740 on: January 30, 2011, 09:03:40 am »

I was opening and closing my bridge to lure the sieging gobos into my traps, suddenly 30+- dwarfs decided that it was a good idea to storm out to recover dead dwarfs. I went from 60 to 30 dwarfs in the matter of seconds, luckily I managed to close the gate before the rest stormed out.

I just had another one too. I had a ghost that was just hanging around in the dinning hall ("who´s that papa?" "Hmm, oh thats just old Agronla" "why is he floating like that?" " He died down in the deep caves a long time ago, never got around recovering his body" "oh") When suddenly about two years after he first appear he scares my legendary engraver to death. That memorial is coming up. (it might be that it was not the same ghost, but I am pretty sure that it was)
« Last Edit: January 30, 2011, 09:40:43 am by henkalv »
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Haedrian

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3741 on: January 30, 2011, 10:21:02 am »

Had a glassmaker jailed for not following a production order. Almost starved to death, so i removed the chain and let him loose.

Captain of the Guard (who's one-handed after losing a fight with an Ogre) grabs the nearest weapon at hand and delivers a beating instead. Unfortunatly nearest weapon and hand happened to be an exceptional adamentine battleaxe.

First strike destroys the stomach
Second strike chops a leg off
Third strike smashes the skull and embeds itself.

Whoops.

Just realised that the same axe also has another dwarven kill on it. Didn't realise he was missing.
« Last Edit: January 30, 2011, 10:25:57 am by Haedrian »
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mnjiman

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3742 on: January 30, 2011, 05:08:30 pm »

I was opening and closing my bridge to lure the sieging gobos into my traps, suddenly 30+- dwarfs decided that it was a good idea to storm out to recover dead dwarfs. I went from 60 to 30 dwarfs in the matter of seconds, luckily I managed to close the gate before the rest stormed out.

I just had another one too. I had a ghost that was just hanging around in the dinning hall ("who´s that papa?" "Hmm, oh thats just old Agronla" "why is he floating like that?" " He died down in the deep caves a long time ago, never got around recovering his body" "oh") When suddenly about two years after he first appear he scares my legendary engraver to death. That memorial is coming up. (it might be that it was not the same ghost, but I am pretty sure that it was)

Can i see that report, or something showing this.. i didnt know dwarfs could be scared to death.
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I was thinking more along the lines of this legendary champion, all clad in dented and dinged up steel plate, his blood-drenched axe slung over his back, a notch in the handle for every enemy that saw the swing of that blade as the last sight they ever saw, a battered shield strapped over his arm... and a fluffy, pink stuffed hippo hidden discretely in his breastplate.

clockout1

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3743 on: January 30, 2011, 05:43:40 pm »

Facepalm moment one-

1. Dig into underground cavern; begin building farm.
2. Designate walls to seal off farm; wait for construction...
3. Draltha enters fortress; ignored due to the fact that it is an herbivore.
4. Miner cancels dig: interrupted by Draltha.
5. Inspect wounds; foot missing.

Facepalm moment two:

1. Dwarf throws tantrum.
2. Miner cancels dig: interrupted by Urist McPissy.
3. Miner has bled to death; stabbed with Urist McPissy's pickaxe.

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*insert witty signature here*

Voyager

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3744 on: January 30, 2011, 06:05:25 pm »

Forgetting that water also moves diagonally when building my drowning trade depot chamber and putting the floodgate
like this I I
           I I
           I I_ _
           IX_ _
So much FUN

I almost did that while build the the channel to my cistern.  To avoid the fun of Building Destroyers and Lever Nuts, I was going to wall it off when it was full.  It is in a dirt layer, so I've been constructing stone floors and walls to keep it from picking up mud on the way in.  Of course, you can't build walls on floors, so I'd heave to deconstruct the floor to put up the wall, which would muddy the water.  So I have to channel the floor, and put a wall in below to act like a floor, but this digs another hole into my storage level, so I needed to build more walls around it, so the water couldn't leak through diagonally. 

It was like the four little flag stones scene from Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

And now an insane elf in a rope reed loincloth is chasing my cook around...
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Haedrian

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3745 on: January 30, 2011, 06:38:57 pm »

Hmm apparently you can't throw caged wild creatures off pits anymore without them trying to maul whoever it is who's trying to toss them.

At least it was a relatively weak creature and only killed 1 dorf 2 animals.

Worst part was that when it got tired out from killing (and having its legs smashed), a dorf actually lead it half the way to the pit before it became aggressive again
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papercrane1001

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3746 on: January 30, 2011, 11:25:20 pm »

Okay, I just had one.

I was using my drowning chamber like usual to kill some troglodytes.  I throw the lever to release them from the cages, throw the lever to open the floodgates, watch them drown for a moment, and then go and do other things. 

Until I get an announcement "Urist McBroker cancels drink: interrupted by troglodyte."

Apparently after the room filled up, they swam out the ceiling, along the channel, and out through a lake I had accidentally connected, but hadn't thought it would cause problems. 

Granted, it looks like the only injuries will be broken toes on the broker, but still.  Going to have to find a way to fix that particular problem...
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henkalv

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3747 on: January 31, 2011, 12:34:46 am »

I was opening and closing my bridge to lure the sieging gobos into my traps, suddenly 30+- dwarfs decided that it was a good idea to storm out to recover dead dwarfs. I went from 60 to 30 dwarfs in the matter of seconds, luckily I managed to close the gate before the rest stormed out.

I just had another one too. I had a ghost that was just hanging around in the dinning hall ("who´s that papa?" "Hmm, oh thats just old Agronla" "why is he floating like that?" " He died down in the deep caves a long time ago, never got around recovering his body" "oh") When suddenly about two years after he first appear he scares my legendary engraver to death. That memorial is coming up. (it might be that it was not the same ghost, but I am pretty sure that it was)

Can i see that report, or something showing this.. i didnt know dwarfs could be scared to death.

I am not sure where it would be, I have abandoned the fort and I did not take any screens
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Ibid Straydrink

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3748 on: January 31, 2011, 01:18:22 am »

It exists. I've seen her with me own eyes- the white wh- message.
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GamerKnight

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3749 on: January 31, 2011, 01:34:02 am »

Egads...  Make a dwarf friends with your noble, and only your noble,  and then kill the dwarf in way to make him pissed, and then he will kill the noble!!! I'm a genius!
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