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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 661125 times)

Owlbread

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #255 on: December 08, 2012, 11:17:01 am »

After living in Japan for a year


People were telling that joke to my mother and father back in the 1960s/70s.
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Machiavelli

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #256 on: December 10, 2012, 09:09:06 am »

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NKAWTG

The Darkling Wolf

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #257 on: December 10, 2012, 11:21:23 am »

Pfaha. That's brilliant.
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My cabbages!
[Thunderfury, Blessed Blade of the Windseeker]

I am fat, eating is my great joy.

Yoink

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #258 on: December 10, 2012, 11:33:22 am »

Indeed it is! :D
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Booze is Life for Yoink

To deprive him of Drink is to steal divinity from God.
you need to reconsider your life
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

Hiiri

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #259 on: December 31, 2012, 02:40:21 pm »

What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Facekillz058

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #260 on: December 31, 2012, 02:47:08 pm »

Is that a Jimmy Carr joke?
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(づ◕◕)づ・。*。✧・゜゜・。✧。*・゜゜・✧。・­¬¬¬¬¬¬¬゜゜・。*。・゜*✧・。*。✧

Tellemurius

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #261 on: December 31, 2012, 02:48:13 pm »

After living in Japan for a year


People were telling that joke to my mother and father back in the 1960s/70s.
'_' i dont get it

The Darkling Wolf

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #262 on: December 31, 2012, 02:50:10 pm »

The famous Japanese stereotype is the mixing up of L's and R's, thus those fellows are shouting 'Supplies' where one would expect them to be shouting 'Surprise'

/jokekiller
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My cabbages!
[Thunderfury, Blessed Blade of the Windseeker]

I am fat, eating is my great joy.

Hiiri

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #263 on: December 31, 2012, 02:53:04 pm »

Is that a Jimmy Carr joke?

No idea. Could be.
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RedKing

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #264 on: December 31, 2012, 02:59:39 pm »

The Japanese thing is awesome. I'm groaning, laughing and feeling guilty at laughing all the same time. Well done.



Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," says Dolly.
"It's true; no bull!" exclaims Daisy.


A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know, I amputated your arms!"


Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him...




















...a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

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Remember, knowledge is power. The power to make other people feel stupid.
Quote from: Neil DeGrasse Tyson
Science is like an inoculation against charlatans who would have you believe whatever it is they tell you.

Sergius

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #265 on: January 02, 2013, 10:38:21 am »

What does a nun and a porcupine have in common?

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Sheb

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #266 on: January 02, 2013, 01:38:04 pm »

Why do anarchists drink herbal tea?

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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

Bauglir

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #267 on: January 02, 2013, 01:56:21 pm »

How many babies does it take to paint a nursery?

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In the days when Sussman was a novice, Minsky once came to him as he sat hacking at the PDP-6.
“What are you doing?”, asked Minsky. “I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe” Sussman replied. “Why is the net wired randomly?”, asked Minsky. “I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play”, Sussman said.
Minsky then shut his eyes. “Why do you close your eyes?”, Sussman asked his teacher.
“So that the room will be empty.”
At that moment, Sussman was enlightened.

Sergius

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #268 on: January 02, 2013, 02:21:53 pm »

Copypasta joke:

The Polish Flea Experiment

A Polish scientist was performing an experiment on the verbal reactions of fleas. He had trained a flea to jump on command.

The scientist commanded the flea, "Jump flea!" and the flea jumped four feet. The scientist wrote in his notebook: "Flea with four feet jumps four feet."

Then the scientist pulled off one of the fleas legs with a pair of tweezers and commanded the flea "Jump flea!" The flea jumped three feet and the scientist wrote it in his notebook.

The scientist did this until the flea had no legs left.

The scientist commanded, "Jump flea!"

Nothing happened.

He tried it again, "Jump flea!"

Again, nothing happened, so even louder he yelled, "Jump flea!"

And still the flea did nothing.

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Sergius

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #269 on: January 02, 2013, 02:28:18 pm »

There were three men in a boat with four cigarettes and no matches. How did they manage to smoke?

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