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Author Topic: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.  (Read 129253 times)

syvarris

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #555 on: January 27, 2014, 06:28:27 pm »

Weren't we supposed to read books to Grate, instead of trying to make a toddler read military strategy books himself?

That... was my intention, yes.

Don't give up on our little warlord!  Read the books to him, and demonstrate effective strategies for him.  Make it into a game and get some little toy army men to demonstrate things more effectively.  Make sure to also get toenail clippers, so that we can realistically demonstrate the effects of mortar fire.

((When I was four, I actually did that.  I'm told that I got angry at my mom for tossing the severed limbs away, because they were necessary for the battlefield.))

Kadzar

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #556 on: January 27, 2014, 06:35:10 pm »

Weren't we supposed to read books to Grate, instead of trying to make a toddler read military strategy books himself?

That... was my intention, yes.

Don't give up on our little warlord!  Read the books to him, and demonstrate effective strategies for him.  Make it into a game and get some little toy army men to demonstrate things more effectively.  Make sure to also get toenail clippers, so that we can realistically demonstrate the effects of mortar fire.

((When I was four, I actually did that.  I'm told that I got angry at my mom for tossing the severed limbs away, because they were necessary for the battlefield.))
+1
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Yoink

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #557 on: January 27, 2014, 06:43:16 pm »

Weren't we supposed to read books to Grate, instead of trying to make a toddler read military strategy books himself?

That... was my intention, yes.

Don't give up on our little warlord!  Read the books to him, and demonstrate effective strategies for him.  Make it into a game and get some little toy army men to demonstrate things more effectively.  Make sure to also get toenail clippers, so that we can realistically demonstrate the effects of mortar fire.

((When I was four, I actually did that.  I'm told that I got angry at my mom for tossing the severed limbs away, because they were necessary for the battlefield.))
+1

((I remember smashing up army men with rocks in the backyard, to simulate heavy shelling. :))))
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Playergamer

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #558 on: January 27, 2014, 07:05:48 pm »

Weren't we supposed to read books to Grate, instead of trying to make a toddler read military strategy books himself?

That... was my intention, yes.

Don't give up on our little warlord!  Read the books to him, and demonstrate effective strategies for him.  Make it into a game and get some little toy army men to demonstrate things more effectively.  Make sure to also get toenail clippers, so that we can realistically demonstrate the effects of mortar fire.

((When I was four, I actually did that.  I'm told that I got angry at my mom for tossing the severed limbs away, because they were necessary for the battlefield.))
+1

((I remember smashing up army men with rocks in the backyard, to simulate heavy shelling. :))))
+1

For the game, make it historical scenarios, with accurate terrain and troop counts (/100 or something). Put Grate on the losing side every time, and give him basic information on what his men can do. When he wins, reward him. When he loses, yell at him.
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WhitiusOpus

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #559 on: January 27, 2014, 07:07:36 pm »

Weren't we supposed to read books to Grate, instead of trying to make a toddler read military strategy books himself?

That... was my intention, yes.

Don't give up on our little warlord!  Read the books to him, and demonstrate effective strategies for him.  Make it into a game and get some little toy army men to demonstrate things more effectively.  Make sure to also get toenail clippers, so that we can realistically demonstrate the effects of mortar fire.

((When I was four, I actually did that.  I'm told that I got angry at my mom for tossing the severed limbs away, because they were necessary for the battlefield.))
+1

((I remember smashing up army men with rocks in the backyard, to simulate heavy shelling. :))))
+1

For the game, make it historical scenarios, with accurate terrain and troop counts (/100 or something). Put Grate on the losing side every time, and give him basic information on what his men can do. When he wins, reward him. When he loses, PUNCH THE LIVING HELL OUTA THE LITTLE SHIT at him.


FTFY
« Last Edit: January 27, 2014, 07:47:28 pm by WhitiusOpus »
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Lightningfalcon

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #560 on: January 27, 2014, 07:34:08 pm »

Weren't we supposed to read books to Grate, instead of trying to make a toddler read military strategy books himself?

That... was my intention, yes.

Don't give up on our little warlord!  Read the books to him, and demonstrate effective strategies for him.  Make it into a game and get some little toy army men to demonstrate things more effectively.  Make sure to also get toenail clippers, so that we can realistically demonstrate the effects of mortar fire.

((When I was four, I actually did that.  I'm told that I got angry at my mom for tossing the severed limbs away, because they were necessary for the battlefield.))
+1

((I remember smashing up army men with rocks in the backyard, to simulate heavy shelling. :))))
+1

For the game, make it historical scenarios, with accurate terrain and troop counts (/100 or something). Put Grate on the losing side every time, and give him basic information on what his men can do. When he wins, reward him. When he loses, PUNCH THE LIVING HELL OUTA THE LITTLE SHIT at him.

FTFY
+1
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HissinhWalnuts

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #561 on: January 27, 2014, 08:42:14 pm »

We need more gods.

Create new gods with our imagination and sacrifice them to Grate.
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Zanzetkuken The Great

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #562 on: January 27, 2014, 11:11:23 pm »

We need more gods.

Create new gods with our imagination and sacrifice them to Grate.


Let's not get too hasty here.  Only one has been killed, and anymore now means that much more against us if we actively go down this path.
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Xanmyral

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #563 on: January 27, 2014, 11:47:22 pm »

+1 the Reading to and war game, -1 to punching and yelling. Instead scold with what he should of done instead.

We should set ourselves up as a rival, not an obstacle.

LordSlowpoke

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #564 on: January 28, 2014, 12:13:05 am »

scolding him with maneuvering him through the ardennes sounds like a much better idea than just punching him in the face
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Yoink

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #565 on: January 28, 2014, 12:19:17 am »

+1 the Reading to and war game, -1 to punching and yelling. Instead scold with what he should of done instead.

We should set ourselves up as a rival, not an obstacle.

I suppose I'll have to +1 this, since it much improves the original idea.
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piecewise

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #566 on: January 28, 2014, 01:00:30 am »

(YOU READING IT TO HIM OR HIM READING THEM DOESN'T REALLY MATTER BUT WHATEVER)

You try the same thing BUT HARDER THIS TIME!

You read the books to him. Through a megaphone. While pinging the little plastic men from RISK at his head.

Yeah, seems to work this time. Perhaps he responds better when he has visual aids hurled into his face.



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TCM

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #567 on: January 28, 2014, 01:05:30 am »

When are we going to teach our son the true American pastime of Pigskin Gridiron? Of course, he doesn't have to learn football and instead can be one of those chess-Playin' pinko redcoat bastards.
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Hapah

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #568 on: January 28, 2014, 01:21:32 am »

If you wanna give the lad a concussion be straight about it. Sign him up for a competitive game of Head-Brick.

(Please don't do this)
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HmH

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Enraged Twerking
« Reply #569 on: January 28, 2014, 02:42:37 am »

Now that Grate has grasped the art of war, teach him to play Dwarf Fortress. In ASCII. Without Dwarf Therapist. That should train his Determinational skill like crazy.
« Last Edit: January 28, 2014, 02:45:32 am by HmH »
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