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[Reese]

Why? Was it a posession? If not, the only things I'd miss there are the gems.

what the hell does one do with a legendary left mitten made of cloth and rock

in a place where it never freezes

Place it outside, use magma to turn it into a !!legendary left mitten!! and watch what the kobold thieves do.

[NW_Kohaku]

yaaaa you can make dwarves with injuries get up and drink beer if you remove their beds and all other non-claimed ones.... so you can make that broken arm dwarf get up and drink beer if you remove his bed.....  Knowledge preventing deaths and causing those that do happen all the worse!

Actually i knew about this bug, but i try not to use such things because they are not intended to be used and it would be kind of lame.

Now i can tell my friends..
"Hey i tried to rescue my champion from thirst and created an artifical waterfall with buckets in the desert.. a short living artifical waterfall"
Friend1: " Wow, lol, they took the buckets from the lower floor and threw it back into the pool creating a waterfall, roflmao"
Friend2: "Seems to be a complex game, i should try it,too"

With the Bug using:
"Hey i rescued my champion using a bug in the game and he..
Friend1:" U used a bug.. sounds like cheating"
Friend2:" Bugusing.. thats lame"

You see not using the bug is much more dwarfenly.
But still surprised me that they really used the pondzone and created something incredible stupid."

I don't consider that "bugusing" (AKA exploits), that is a "hackish workaround of a currently existing (negative) bug, that manually accomplishes something your dwarves should have been able to do, given what you had already set up for them".

[Akura]

Why? Was it a posession? If not, the only things I'd miss there are the gems.

what the hell does one do with a legendary left mitten made of cloth and rock

in a place where it never freezes

First ever oven mit?

Maybe. They say that's how the first anvil was invented.

[Vorthon]

My first (and only one I can remember at the moment) was when I tried to drain a magma vent (before I knew they naturally refilled). So I ordered a couple dwarves to dig out a channel between the vent and a hillside. One of the dwarves got stuck on a chunk of land. "What did he decide to do?", you may ask. Well, he decided to dig out the ground from under his feet. He then fell into the lava and died. It was stupid on my part, because I didn't consider chopping down the trees before designating the area to be channeled out. apparently dwarfs can't channel out a square diagonally adjacent to them if there's a tree in the square horizontally or vertical adjacent to them. (I'll make a diagram later.)

[deoxys413]

Where to start... I had one recent fortress upon where I had just flooded out some... Stuff. I ordered some masons to cover the hole/stairwell used to make this possible, the thing is I thought that constructing a floor would only destroy the 'down' part of the 1x1 tile up/down stairway, nupe. The death of these two apparently well known masons sent the entire fortress into a tantrum spiral. I was about 30 casualties into this, confused as to why this started, only to find miasma on the surface coming from the holes I ordered patched... and two mason corpses. -palm-

[Eater of Vermin]

Discovering how ramps actually work.

Or, more to the point, discovering that - under certain conditions - a ramp will not support that large multi-level area I'd been mining out with future intent to collapse...

[Legendary_Catsmith]

I just had a great one yesterday.  Opened my magma floodgates for a test run, and to fill my moat with magma.
Then subsequently discovered that certain types of mechanisms will melt under the stress of magmafication.  Could not shut magma gate.  Just as I'm scrambling to find a way to enact Operation Emergency Shutoff, one of my critical dorfs gets possessed by a mood and wants turtle shell and two "stone".  What kind of stone is utterly beyond me.

Fun was soon to follow.

[smjjames]

I just had a great one yesterday.  Opened my magma floodgates for a test run, and to fill my moat with magma.
Then subsequently discovered that certain types of mechanisms will melt under the stress of magmafication.  Could not shut magma gate.  Just as I'm scrambling to find a way to enact Operation Emergency Shutoff, one of my critical dorfs gets possessed by a mood and wants turtle shell and two "stone".  What kind of stone is utterly beyond me.

Fun was soon to follow.

It just means any rock that is closest to them. You should have no problem with that requirement.

[Spectre]

I just had a great one yesterday.  Opened my magma floodgates for a test run, and to fill my moat with magma.
Then subsequently discovered that certain types of mechanisms will melt under the stress of magmafication.  Could not shut magma gate.  Just as I'm scrambling to find a way to enact Operation Emergency Shutoff, one of my critical dorfs gets possessed by a mood and wants turtle shell and two "stone".  What kind of stone is utterly beyond me.

Fun was soon to follow.

It just means any rock that is closest to them. You should have no problem with that requirement.

I belive you have to combine the two statments here:
Could not shut magma gate.
one of my critical dorfs gets possessed [..]
Indicated by
Fun was soon to follow.

[PartyBear]

I had a couple of facepalm moments recently involving an immigrant with a female kitten.  I had exactly one cat, a male, and I didn't want any more, so I set about creating a simple pet elimination device like I'd seen here or on the wiki.  Once I finally had the lever and spike built and connected and the doors placed (which involved a mini-facepalm since I used the lever's profile to assign it to the cat owner before getting a mechanic to link it to the spike), I ordered the lever pulled and waited.  And waited.  I finally zoomed to the cat owner and found out that he was a child, so he wouldn't pull the lever.  Facepalm #1. 

I tried assigning the lever to his mom, but apparently immigrant kids don't follow mom around like fortress-born kids do.  I ended up tearing down the pet killer and began planning Operation: Kill That Kid's Cat.  I came up with the idea to build a whole bunch of walls in a room at the end of a corridor with a pet-impassible door in it, with a side path where I could trap the cat in a room with a spike.  I figured if I started a massive dumping project, all the adults would be too busy to take down walls, so only kids and nobles would enter the corridor.  It was a hassle, but the kitten had matured and was probably already pregnant, so the clock was ticking.

When the lever was hooked up to the spike, I used the stock screen to mark all alunite for dumping, then designated the constructed walls for removal.  Half of them lit up, and I zoomed to the cat owner again to see if he was coming.  I zoomed to a peasant.  The little jerk had grown up while I was setting everything up, and I hadn't paid enough attention to notice!  Facepalm#2.

[!!Zombie Carp!!]

Just read the entire thread.

"Here is a prone maniacally giggling !!Zombie Carp!! in a pool of tears."

[XSI]

Had another facepalm just a few minutes ago.

Adventure mode, trying to find my way down after traveling all over a mountain range(No fast travel) I find a waterfall in a brook, and it is a series of small 1-2 z level drops spread out over a long trip down. Knowing how dwarves just completely shrug off such drops in fortress mode, I figured I'd go through there to get down a bit easier, and to grab a drink since my waterskin was empty.

First drop, 2z levels. Broke an arm, bruised several other parts. My sword drops but I just pick it up again. No worries, the arm will just heal.
Second drop, 1z level. By now I'm surrounded by 3z high cliffs, so no going back now. The second drop breaks both my legs, so I'll have to crawl.
Third drop, another 1z. Bruised spine, otherwise no problems.
Fourth drop, 2z, broke my hand on the not yet broken arm, drop my shield and pass out from the pain for a while.
From there on it seemed to be fine, by then the mountain around me became a bit lower, so I could see 4z high cliffs to both sides, can't go back, so I go forward.

Looking ahead, I see the brook is getting another waterfall, and hope I can survive it.

It's a 6 z level drop.

All because I wanted to drink from the brook, and then I noticed that I had armours with loads of water coverings I could drink, as it had been raining just before I jumped in. Facepalm.

[Nakanja]

Some dwarves were complaining about the well going dry, so I opened the floodgates to let some more water into the tank from the brook.  Then I went to bed, and in next morning I had forgotten I left the water on.  The well was on the same line as the waterfall generator for the dining room, which was turning from a pleasant mist into a dwarf aquarium.  So I sent a miner to punch a hole in the water tank to drain it a bit.  I was expecting it to just leak out and the miner could leave before the tunnel filled up, but instead I got a rushing torrent that submerged the miner before he could take a step.  Luckily the impact washed the miner down the tunnel past an open floodgate, so I could seal it without trapping the miner inside.  Amazingly no one died from that, but it left me with a muddy mess in the dining room and water-filled storage yards.

[darthbob88]

Just had a legitimate semi-facepalm. My usual method of setting up my fortress is centered on a 3xN hallway, with everything else sprouting off of that, workshop spaces, housing, dining hall, everything, and with each z-level connected by an up/down stairway set in the walls of the halls. This has been somewhat problematic for me, as it meant I had to set the working/living spaces around the stairways, so as to make it easier to lock mad/undesirable dwarfs in their workshops/rooms. I just now realized, I could dig stairways in the middle of the hallways! Caravans will never go there, dwarves and animals can path through them easily enough, and I can build workshops and bedrooms wherever I like and damn the staircases.

[Urist McOverlord]

Facepalm waiting to happen:

Problem: wounded dorfs needed water.
Solution: open a floodgate so that water can fall from the brook, into a cistern.
Problem: pressurized water flowing out of the well.
Solution: close the floodgate:
Problem: the lever for the floodgate is right next to the well. The well is overflowing...
Solution: pray... hey, it worked! Only a little bit around the well flooded, not enough to cause problems with pathing.
Problem: the cistern is very small...

Fun!