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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2126694 times)

MystRunner

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6000 on: March 20, 2012, 10:04:15 pm »

Very first time I ever played DF 2010 after learning in 40d. I wondered why the heck the ground where my animals were kept was turning brown and they were dieing.....and my chickens were thriving. Yeah took me a while to figure this out and a trip to the wiki. After reading the wiki I facepalmed so hard.

Thank you for actually making herbivorous eat grass....Now just allow me to make hay please.
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I don't know what is more impressive, that dwarves can skip salting and curing meat opting for zombiefication, or that the dark art of necromancy has been twisted to the cause of curing meats.

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rtg593

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6001 on: March 20, 2012, 10:10:39 pm »

Now just allow me to make hay please.

Oh, heck to the ya...

Hmmm... Can you mod grass to be plant gatherable, them mod grazers to also be able to eat gathered grass, aka hay?

Must look into this...
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Reudh

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6002 on: March 21, 2012, 05:01:16 am »

I think so, given pandas only eat bamboo. It probably could be doable.

TomiTapio

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6003 on: March 21, 2012, 05:22:05 am »

Now just allow me to make hay please.
Oh, heck to the ya... Hmmm... Can you mod grass to be plant gatherable, them mod grazers to also be able to eat gathered grass, aka hay? Must look into this...
Doesn't seem moddable to me, as grass is a type of ground covering, like snow.
Could try to simulate grass gathering by a 5x5 workshop that makes "hay" out of nothing, but, the grazer-tagged animals cannot eat the custom "hay" plant it outputs.
Just mod the grazing tag out, and use your own rules on when the cows live or die from lack of grass. Also, the caves are always there for you.
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Garath

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6004 on: March 21, 2012, 06:46:33 am »

(Mods) put a fire-throwing and web-slinging super in the same squad. I sent them against one honey badger, and they all died, leaving a huge mangled pile of severed limbs and burnt bodies tangled with web. The woodcutter who the honey badger kept interrupting survived because he fell into a webbed cage trap. Most of the other animals on that z-level died from the forest fire. Fortunately, they also got the badger.

this has been said so often... Only mod in fire breathing/throwing if you also make your dwarfs fire proof, as well as their clothing, and keep trouble away from your booze stockpile. On the same note: tame dragons are more dangerous to you than to your enemy.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
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FrisianDude

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6005 on: March 21, 2012, 11:50:02 am »

Seems someone's pet duck jumped into the magma for some reason.

Edit; echhh. I had a hydra and a pit for it. There it killed a goblin and a raven (other raven had been killed by the goblin and it left two dralthas and a plump helmet man alone.) But the second time it never left it's corridor the cage had been in and as such I had the goblin shot and stabbed in the brain. I thought "I'll leave the floodgate open, that way it'll walk into a cage trap if it leaves that place" but in stead of that a beekeeper decided to come fetch either the cage or the mechanism and without even saying 'eep' the beekeeper walked straight at the hydra who needed all of two moves to kill it. I then rashly told three squadrons to kill it; my 'guard' squad, my mcom's shooters and my melee cavern watch. All on duty. Only I then decided to cancel the cavern watch squad's order as they'd have to travel too far, and i told the other two squads to wait at the 'balcony' over looking the killing pit. Only the Swordsdwarf of the two-Dwarf guard. Isn't wearing mail or breastplate or even a helmet. Has got one gauntlet, iron, two boots, steel and steel greaves, together with a steel sword and a copper shield, but body armour would have been nice. ::)


Edit2; Sarvesh the swordsdwarf gets bitten in the swords-hand; the one without a gauntlet and drops her sword.
Edit3; Sarvesh didn't even manage to scratch the fucking beast.
Edit4; one of my recruits is tantrumming. Threw a chestnut armor bin at a cheese maker who happened to be nearby and shattered his left lower arm bone.
Edit5; the nurse who was recovering the wounded cheesenista was punched in the feet (!) by the tantrumhead and it seems the nurse is now being taken to hospital and the cheesifax is lying on the floor. Ah, no, not true. The nurse is reporting the crime to the captain of the guard and the engineer who I thought was recovering the nurse is recovering lord Cheese.

Edit6; several Dwarfs reported the crime but it doesn't show up in the justice screen? Also, under the name of 'starting a fist fight' the recruit teased a ram by grabbing parts of it with his battle axe. Not sure how that works, but hey.
« Last Edit: March 21, 2012, 05:59:36 pm by FrisianDude »
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arzzult

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6006 on: March 21, 2012, 06:29:40 pm »

Spend two hours designing a large cliff side complex with waterfalls going through the dining room then deside to add an under ground trade depot. I screw up the ramp designs since it's been so long since I last used them. I don't notice this till after they are half dug out. I have OCD tendancies. I force quit out so I can start again in the same place, designating every thing all over. Face meet palm.
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FrisianDude

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6007 on: March 22, 2012, 07:36:43 am »

Instead of placing doors I placed some down-stairs in front of bedrooms. ::)
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A tiny, foul-tempered humanoid creature that dwells in the evil mountains. They are known to enjoy drinking liquor and will take any unguarded supplies of booze.

Naryar

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6008 on: March 22, 2012, 08:26:33 am »

New fortress, revealing the map to see what it is. 2x3 map, volcano, 1 tiles of mountain, 2 tiles of badlands, 1 tile of temperate grassland. Conglomerate, including a 6-z-level aquifer, and that goddamn aquifer is blocking most of my access to coal, half of the magnetite cluster and other sedimentary minerals. grrr.

Then I check the caverns, and frenetically search for water in it because I had just one murky pool and no water in the caverns. I think "crap crap crap, not much water on there ! my wounded dwarves might die of thirst after I drain entirely that murky pool...

Then I remember the aquifer  :P

And now I have ideas about making an obsidian trap.
« Last Edit: March 22, 2012, 08:32:31 am by Naryar »
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AWdeV

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6009 on: March 22, 2012, 11:32:11 am »

"Oh golly, I am a weaponsmith and I have a fey mood". Now, we have gold bars in stock and we have steel bars. I can make any kind of weapon I want! Oh I know, I'll grab a nickel bar!"
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isometrist

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6010 on: March 22, 2012, 12:27:21 pm »

I tend to get a little too ambitious in new forts. I plan a deep, complex, efficient city, then dig it all out, have migrants move all the valuables out as they're found... and then the traders come, and I realize I haven't actually crafted anything worth trading yet.

Temporary fort with just the essentials for early-game production? Nope, the idea never quite sinks in for me.
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ZestDwarf

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6011 on: March 22, 2012, 05:05:36 pm »

So i have a couple face palm moments for you.
I'll do them in chronological order.

So it's my first practice fort, and i had designed a weird walled off area outside of my gate for my refuse and my animals.
   
__/------------\  <-hillock
         _ _ _ _ _
       |             |
       | Refuse    | Outside
-----|             |----------
Entrance to fort            Gate
-----|             |----------
       |   Animals  | Outside
       |_________|

i built it weird because of the hills outside of my entrance.
ANYWAY. i suddenly get the warning that there is a siege. "No problem!" i say as i pull the lever and close up my fort and outside areas neatly.
A little ways into the siege, i suddenly get the message "Urist mc scaredy pants Cancels store item in stockpile, interrupted by troll"
Oh no! has the enemy found it's way inside? i haven't even figured out the military yet!
I look outside and see a huge stream of dwarves moving out of my fort to pick up an item i had dumped earlier, they got into the animal/ refuse box and suddenly ran into the animal side and were currently running back and forth along the wall like chickens with their heads cut off. They actually started leaving tread-marks on the ground where they killed the grass.
"ah Crap! where is the troll?" i look outside the wall to the hillock i should have removed earlier. a lone troll had gotten a lucky chance to spy one of my dwarves, and was sitting on top of the hill staring into my base. "dammit! he cant get you idiots!"
The most irritating part was that i didn't have any bowmen or even a military. so i was stuck as Mr. Troll stared at my dwarves as eventually 50 of them were running back and forth against the wall, with myself at the time unaware of how to fix it. -facepalm- Fort ended by death glare and advanced exercise program.

The Second face palm moment i encountered was recently when i embarked in an evil mountain area with a river source.
It was going well, no undead yet, it seemed like i would get started easily in this place. My dwarves were fishing merrily in the river source, and food levels were on the rise.
Suddenly three doom clouds roll in one after another. Luckily i am able to get my dwarves safely within the fort, so no problems there. but as my fisherman goes out to fish again, im assaulted by interruption messages. Gasp! the undead! i look outside and see a horde of ravenous .. mussels??? ... apparently the dead Mussels the dwarves left on the beach after fishing came to life in the death mist and were chasing my fisherman. Well dammit...
figuring it wouldn't be much of a challenge i drafted the miners into the military and they went out and stepped on the mollusks. (literally, no fight, just a SQUELCH) OK ... undead are dead-dead. now to pick up the bodies out here and garbage compact them.
So i mine out a small trash room inside and move the shells inside, and begin building a compacter room next to it. Oooooh the many face palms after this.
The damn mollusks kept coming back to undeath, and i continuously had to draft a military to step on them. the irritating part was that the non-military dwarves who were building/hauling kept running away as they came back to life 30 seconds after being killed. so i was left with a group of dwarves in my militia running around in the refuse room stomping on the mollusks that started moving again, while my workers tried to build and were continuously scared out of the room.
-facepalm-
Then while i was distracted a horse died of hunger and came to life, starting a spiral that ended in my defeat. CURSE YOU UNDEAD MUSSELS.
« Last Edit: March 22, 2012, 05:11:59 pm by ZestDwarf »
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Garath

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6012 on: March 22, 2012, 05:37:57 pm »

therefor, the lesson, when embarking in an area that reanimates dead creatures, don't fish, don't hunt, dont't butcher. Kick everything out of your fort and lock the doors. This includes any dogs or cats you accidentally brought and the pack animals.

On the other hand, they could have been turned by the mist and then yes, the general name is husk, though the actual name depends on the cloud. which is basically an unstoppable reanimating killing machine.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

Splint

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6013 on: March 23, 2012, 09:38:46 pm »

Bring sword instructor. Embark on volcano. Bring steel bars. Make steel spear instead of sword.

lazygun

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6014 on: March 24, 2012, 08:37:22 am »

I noticed piles of withered pig tails in my refuse heap, fields full of unharvested crop, and my food stockpile empty, and 50 out of 75 dwarves on 'no job'. I turned 'dwarves all harvest' back on and that didn't get them harvesting. I thought I discovered a new bug. Then I realised I'd pressed 'f' in the work order preferences screen instead of 'F' to set forbidding of corpses and +cave spider silk sock+s.
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