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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2131091 times)

Two

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8835 on: September 21, 2014, 02:37:48 pm »

So my world does have some were-creature issues I learned...

First time I got a Werewolf I learned that they ignore all the traps. All dwarfs murdered.
2nd time I was prepared and had 10 dwarfs with crossbows ready. Got a were-turtle. They literally ignore all piercing weapons. All dwarfs murdered.
3rd time I had traps, melee dwarfs and ranged dwarfs. Learned that were-creatures actually contract the disease when half my fortress turned into mindless killing machines. All dwarfs murdered.
4th time I got paranoid. Traps, soldiers and a drawbridge so I could raise it at the first sight of trouble, completely locking my fortress. Also a few dogs outside to warn of incoming enemies. Got a were-chameleon. Those guys are almost invisible. First time I saw him was inside my base when he was already eating my soldiers.
Also on that try: I imprisoned all dwarfs that might have gotten infected by sealing off the hospital. As expected they turned into were-creatures, which wouldn't have been a problem because they were buried alive, however game got bugged because of that.

Next time I just put up a sign on the front door: "No were-creatures allowed"
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Jigowah

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8836 on: September 21, 2014, 05:28:25 pm »

I was using a legendary hammer were-dwarf as a cave explorer with wonderful success...until a forgotten beast attacked.  A real nasty three eyed, heavily armored gecco that spit webs.  He didn't do that much damage, but he virtually refused to die.  Hits from a team of legendary hammerdwarves and trained marksmen were connecting, but he would just form scar tissue and keep going.  The battle went on for months.

In the end, most of the fortress was dead in a gigantic plug of webs, blood and insanity in one of my stairwells to the caves.  There were 20+ bodies on a each stair tile.

The tantrum spiral is making me reach for a new world gen.  Thanks for the fun!
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D34dlock

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8837 on: September 21, 2014, 05:32:56 pm »

Note to self:

Do NOT allow a legendary woodcrafter to make the fort's supply of wooden practice bolts.
If the bolts getting used caused a tantrum, it sounds like a bug. Bad thoughts from a Masterwork item getting destroyed should not happen if the item was destroyed by getting used for it's intended purpose. Masterwork prepared food is an example.
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Psyra

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8838 on: September 21, 2014, 08:11:21 pm »

Face Palm Moment? Let's see.... realizing too late that building a floodgate on the wall separating your main vertical corridor from your moat is a Bad Idea when a weregecko comes to visit comes to mind. :D

What's worse, is that the flooding damage wasn't covered by Geico!
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Mentalpatient87

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8839 on: September 21, 2014, 09:43:15 pm »

Just now had the first caravan show up. The guards and merchants are all sufficiently bearded, but the outpost liaison is a goblin. Not sure how to respond to this..
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Tacomagic

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8840 on: September 21, 2014, 10:30:45 pm »

Just now had the first caravan show up. The guards and merchants are all sufficiently bearded, but the outpost liaison is a goblin. Not sure how to respond to this..

When in doubt: magma.
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Quartz_Mace

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8841 on: September 21, 2014, 10:33:39 pm »

Hmmm. Face palm moments... How about all of them?
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damnit,urist,youhadonejob

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8842 on: September 21, 2014, 10:50:02 pm »

Making a thread after trying to find this one but failing to find it.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
oh and this still makes my blood boil.
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SimRobert2001

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8843 on: September 22, 2014, 09:14:35 pm »

"A were lizard? WEll, i'll send all my finely trained dwarfs after him!"
"oh, god! Why aren't marksdwarfs using crossbows!"
"Oh, god, its kicking everyone's ass!"
"oh, god, i'm at 55 dwarves out of 80! He's badly wounded, but isn't dying!"
"oh, god, 40 out of 80!"
"oh, look he transformed into a human! Kill him!"
"oh, good he's dead!"
*one tantrum spiral later*

"Well, 9 out of 80 dwarves. Well, this is going to be difficult for a bit, but I think i can..."

*Urist mcWoodworker has changed into a werelizard!"
*Urist Mctrader had changed into a werelizard!"
"Urist McPeasant has changed into a werelizard!"

Me: *looks for a place to put the three were lizards, but finds nothing. now at 6 out of 80 dwarves.  The werelizards are not responding to military commands.* "AAAAAAAAAAAND Abandon."

*on reclaim*

"okay, so no one here, stuff everywhere... Okay! lets get this done!"

*pause* "Wait a moment, I could've used those three dwarves as a superweapon.  The fortress would have lived, but migrants would have come. THEY could have locked them in somewhere.* "FUUUUUU----"
« Last Edit: September 22, 2014, 09:17:37 pm by SimRobert2001 »
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Kogsak Kinakrul

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8844 on: September 23, 2014, 09:03:36 am »

1
Tell someone to pull the lever in the danger room.
Gets killed by a punch that literally distroyed his head.
The captain confused him with a recruit. (I want to hope that)
The worst part: He enjoyed it.

2
New dwarf in the fortress.
EXACTLY WHEN HE ARRIVES TO THE MEETING AREA: "Urist McSuicidal is stricken by melancholy!"
Just... Why.
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pisskop

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8845 on: September 23, 2014, 09:05:45 am »

1
Tell someone to pull the lever in the danger room.
Gets killed by a punch that literally distroyed his head.
The captain confused him with a recruit. (I want to hope that)
The worst part: He enjoyed it.

2
New dwarf in the fortress.
EXACTLY WHEN HE ARRIVES TO THE MEETING AREA: "Urist McSuicidal is stricken by melancholy!"
Just... Why.
Today gave them the ability to get Emo and nihilistic.
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TheHossofMoss

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8846 on: September 23, 2014, 09:24:42 am »

1
Tell someone to pull the lever in the danger room.
Gets killed by a punch that literally distroyed his head.
The captain confused him with a recruit. (I want to hope that)
The worst part: He enjoyed it.

2
New dwarf in the fortress.
EXACTLY WHEN HE ARRIVES TO THE MEETING AREA: "Urist McSuicidal is stricken by melancholy!"
Just... Why.
Today gave them the ability to get Emo and nihilistic.

Maybe he'll start writing dark fiction and poetry. Maybe like giant ravens or something too..
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Bralbaard

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8847 on: September 23, 2014, 12:35:03 pm »

I had just finished digging a wide moat around my fortress , and the construction of an impressive drawbridge. The moat was nearly filled with water, when finally the first caravan shows up with much needed trade goods. I have my dwarves haul the glass crafts and goblets to the depot, then watch in horror as the wagons plunge into the moat and drown themselves.

So after spending the first year digging the moat, my next project will be to drain the moat so I can get the anvil and other goods that are now sitting under water. Of course I forgot to install floodgates for emergencies like this before filling the moat.
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Icefire2314

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8848 on: September 23, 2014, 09:37:19 pm »

Minkot Stinthadanost, Laochra, has grown attached to a coffee wood training spear!

Thiiiiiis could prove problematic..
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FoiledFencer

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8849 on: September 24, 2014, 03:16:08 am »

Minkot Stinthadanost, Laochra, has grown attached to a coffee wood training spear!

Thiiiiiis could prove problematic..

Make him a hammerer or captain of the guard. I assing them training weapons and they will use them as batons for beating the crap out of criminals without killing them.
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