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Author Topic: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves  (Read 1501127 times)

Tirion

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3660 on: May 28, 2012, 08:21:38 am »

Urist, why O WHY you drop and "can't pick it up boss, dangerous terrain" important stuff when admiring my perfectly safe mist generator??
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"Fools dig for water, corpses, or gold. The earth's real treasure is far deeper."

wierd

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3661 on: May 28, 2012, 10:57:42 am »

Urist, why O WHY you drop and "can't pick it up boss, dangerous terrain" important stuff when admiring my perfectly safe mist generator??


I'm a dwarf maan! Half me body's made of DIRT! Gettin me wet, from head ta toe!? Ya tryin ta kill me lad!? Nae! I taint goin nuplace near it!

And I drops the stoof cause it burns me suh much!
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WillowLuman

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3662 on: May 28, 2012, 11:19:11 pm »

Urist, why O WHY you drop and "can't pick it up boss, dangerous terrain" important stuff when admiring my perfectly safe mist generator??


I'm a dwarf maan! Half me body's made of DIRT! Gettin me wet, from head ta toe!? Ya tryin ta kill me lad!? Nae! I taint goin nuplace near it!

And I drops the stoof cause it burns me suh much!
Thats it, modding dwarves to be Earthbenders now.
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Dwarf Souls: Prepare to Mine
Keep Me Safe - A Girl and Her Computer (Illustrated Game)
Darkest Garden - Illustrated game. - What mysteries lie in the abandoned dark?

Garath

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3663 on: May 29, 2012, 02:54:04 am »

they are going to spit boulders like magma crabs?
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

Eric Blank

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3664 on: May 29, 2012, 04:16:08 am »

Dear Urist McOnfire

How the fuck did you even manage to do that!?

Sincerely, your utterly confuzzled Overseer.

P.S. Nevermind, figured it out. Gonna build a wall around the magma-incinerator shute so your wife doesn't catch the ‼magmatic happiness‼ as well.
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Garath

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3665 on: May 29, 2012, 08:19:29 am »

yay for magma mist
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

FFXBHU

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3666 on: May 29, 2012, 10:22:59 am »

Dear Urist,

Especially if you're carving stairs upwards I would like to get a damp stone warning and job cancelation.

Sincerely,

My last fortress
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Blizzlord

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3667 on: May 29, 2012, 10:33:45 am »

Dear Urist McVampire:

Please don't drink my dwarves blood. Doing that kills them, and I need them and their blood to create a magma death ray.

Sincerely, the weaponization overseer.
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nymall

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3668 on: May 29, 2012, 01:42:26 pm »

Dear Urist McThirsty,

I can understand the toil of working in the caverns, and that good, hard work can make one SO THIRSTY. I can understand that in your dehydrated state, jumping off the bridge into the liquid below sounded like a good idea. What was the thing that tipped you off that this wasn't water? The slight burning feeling? The glowing? Or was it the fire, Urist, was it the fire?

I realize that about half-way down,  You came to the conclusion that this was a stupid mistake. Unfortunately, you were at the bottom of the MAGMA SEA at the time, so there wasn't much I could do for you. Your much smarter, and very much still alive relatives will be left to deal with the funeral arrangements.

Sincerely,
Your Confused Overseer.
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WriterX

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3669 on: May 29, 2012, 02:27:22 pm »

Dear Urist McDoctor,

WHY U NO HEAL?

Sincerely,

Dying Dorf
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JarinArenos

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3670 on: May 29, 2012, 02:39:56 pm »

Dear Hungry McGuardcaptain...

Those parallel tracks carved into the ground are not a good place to sit down for a snack. Please remember this when you return to active duty.

Sincerly, high command.
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snoopychicken

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3671 on: May 29, 2012, 04:52:48 pm »

Dear ex-residents of Spirithelm,
I meant to press save not abandon! Honestly! Feel free to come back when the place is up and running again.
With apologies,
Your bumbling overseer
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Hamsmagoo

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3672 on: May 29, 2012, 07:17:42 pm »

Dear Urist McRandomHauler,

Why did you just put a wool bag of plump helmet seeds on a cinnabar chair in the house of the Captain of the Guard?  What gave you the impression that a cinnabar chair in the house of the Captain of the Guard was the seed stockpile?
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crazysheep

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3673 on: May 29, 2012, 07:18:14 pm »

Dear Urist McDoctor,

WHY U NO HEAL?

Sincerely,

Dying Dorf

Urist McDoctor cancels reply: On break
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"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, for there's nothing a kid can't do."

Boes

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #3674 on: May 29, 2012, 08:04:34 pm »

Dear Urist:

When I direct you to channel out the stones holding the magma back,  don't jump down there to see if it's hot.  It is.

and stop running for the booze stockpile once you catch on fire.

3 forts lost to booze fire now,  today.
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Life has a 100% mortality rate.
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