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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1008036 times)

Rolepgeek

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1830 on: April 23, 2016, 11:09:23 pm »

Why would they bomb a Sikh temple? Seems like a weird target.
Yey religion thred crossover

Why does it seem like a weird target?
Besides being dickheads in general, the salafists born and raised in the West that MUST REMOVE SIKH are probably those of rural Pakistani stock, or else are one of the newly arrived from rural Pakistan/grew up in such a community. Or could just be general dickheads who just want to remove Sikhs because they are infidels.

Sikh OP
YHWH pls nerf

That was actually really cool though, LW. Was not aware of the Sikh history like that, and had not read enough of the religion thread to see it.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1831 on: April 24, 2016, 01:31:51 am »

Spoiler: mo religion mo thread (click to show/hide)

Rolepgeek

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1832 on: April 24, 2016, 01:42:44 am »

I'd say we've moved on since then but on a stretch we could say our artificial fibre textiles are based upon petroleum which we're still fighting over so some things kinda change, but not really
One of these days we'll kill each other over something really important, like tin or advertising space
In a book I read recently, the film industry is on the moon, and they wage wars over copyrights and film production rights and patents and so forth. Which is honestly what I'm guessing will be the likely next step...the blueprints to make the clothing, rather than the materials themselves.

I don't think I talked about Sikhs before. Really neat thinking about one of those "what ifs," if the syncretic liberal Mughal Emperor-to-be hadn't been snaked by his "ban this sick filth" brother. How do you make it go so wrong so quickly

Really funny thing as well is how the angry Mughal Emperors shot themselves in the foot by denying themselves access to Hindu bankers, reminds me of the whole Jewish banking thing (funniest one for me is when some Christians kicked some Jews out and their townhall burnt down, to rebuild it they had to plead the Jews to come back to give a loan).[/spoiler]
There was an alternate history book either recommended or desired at one point that I remember that was supposed to be about if the British Empire had asked and subsequently learned how the Hindi wives they were taking in India had basically no scars from smallpox, and if they'd been able to learn about vaccination for that those few hundred years earlier, and how BrIndia basically would've taken over the world forever.
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Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1833 on: April 24, 2016, 02:00:36 am »

Yay, thanks for the history LW. I wasn't aware that Sikh were parts of the partition plans, neither that they were assigned to Pakistan.

Quote
Quote from: Sheb on April 22, 2016, 01:38:52 am
To avenge Sikh/German bombing Syria? To kill moderate muslims sikh leaders? Because Sikh represent Israel?
1. No
2. Sikhs aren't Muslims
3. No
Basically Sikhs are kuffars

I was being ironic. I know Sikh ain't muslims. What I was trying to ask was, given this:
Quote
Sikhs are in their main target, their main target is just a very big one that happens to include most of the world. Their physical jihad is given priority based off of political concerns as much as religious ones so that may give the impression that they hate x group more than y but it's mostly a case of ability and opportunity.

Why the seemingly sudden increase in priority for Sikh given the abundance of other targets with higher priority available? I mean, in Europe, Islamist attacks so far has been targeted at: a) People criticizing Islam (Charlie Hebdo, that Danish cartoonist), b) civilians of countries seen to be at war with Islam (London bombing and that beheading guy, Paris and Brussels attacks (although those were also about blowing up before being arrested), Madrid... and c) Jews (Overlap with b) as they're seen to represent Israel I guess): Brussels Jewish museum attack, Nerah in France. It's not that they don't want to made the rest of the world Dar-al-Islam, it's just that with a target this size, they have to prioritize. So my question was: is there some recent development that mean Sikh are now higher priority or something?

Also, dead kufr don't pay taxes, and how are they going to buy rolexes otherwise.

P.S. Also, do the IS type really adhere to that "religion of the book" thing? To quote Dabiq's latest issue: " There is the religion of Allah,
which is Islam, and then the religion of anything else, which is kufr"
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sprinkled chariot

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1834 on: April 24, 2016, 02:44:43 am »

How much house of lords affects british politics?
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1835 on: April 24, 2016, 05:39:53 am »

Thanks for the cross-info post LW. Don't worry I'm not gonna snarl about keeping religion in the religion thread, I only do that when there's suddenly 5 pages of religion posts within a day or two. This was just good info.

EDIT: Ebru Umar has been released from police custody after being questioned this morning. She is forbidden to leave the country pending trial, being accused of insulting sultan president Erdogan on social media. She has been provided with a lawyer by the Dutch honorary consul in Izmir.
Yesterday evening our prime minister Rutte phoned Umar to inquire into the matter and offer assistance.
He twittered that the ministry of foreign affairs, and minister Koenders are keeping a close eye on events, and doing all they can to assist.
Umar herself reports to have been treated well by the police. "I am sitting outside the station, with a cup of tea", she reported this morning.
« Last Edit: April 24, 2016, 09:09:26 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1836 on: April 24, 2016, 10:32:04 am »

Spoiler: moooo religion (click to show/hide)

Thanks for the cross-info post LW. Don't worry I'm not gonna snarl about keeping religion in the religion thread, I only do that when there's suddenly 5 pages of religion posts within a day or two. This was just good info.
Don't jynx it xD

EDIT: Ebru Umar has been released from police custody after being questioned this morning. She is forbidden to leave the country pending trial, being accused of insulting sultan president Erdogan on social media. She has been provided with a lawyer by the Dutch honorary consul in Izmir.
Yesterday evening our prime minister Rutte phoned Umar to inquire into the matter and offer assistance.
He twittered that the ministry of foreign affairs, and minister Koenders are keeping a close eye on events, and doing all they can to assist.
Umar herself reports to have been treated well by the police. "I am sitting outside the station, with a cup of tea", she reported this morning.
http://www.spectator.co.uk/2016/04/send-us-your-entries-for-our-president-erdogan-insulting-poetry-competition/
The Spectator are offering a £1,000 prize for the most insulting poem to Erdogan

MonkeyHead

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1837 on: April 24, 2016, 11:01:56 am »

The Spectator are offering a £1,000 prize for the most insulting poem to Erdogan

There once was a Turkman named Erdogan
Who was well blessed with an ample suntan
His moustache lacked class
And he talked from his ass
The EU would remove him if they can.

... this might need some work. *shrug*
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1838 on: April 24, 2016, 01:38:42 pm »

The mayor was known as Gökçek,
Ankaran Mansur shouts toxic.
With tax money bought,
A statue handwrought,
Remember -
Respect the Robot!

TheDarkStar

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1839 on: April 24, 2016, 01:55:34 pm »

The Spectator are offering a £1,000 prize for the most insulting poem to Erdogan

Erdogan.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Don't die; it's bad for your health!

it happened it happened it happen im so hyped to actually get attacked now

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1840 on: April 24, 2016, 02:18:13 pm »

Sultan Erdogan
the dirty shoe hits his face
he is a disgrace

(in muslim culture, hitting someone with a shoe is the worst insult you can make. That, and shoe rhymes with Haiku)
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1841 on: April 24, 2016, 02:55:27 pm »

Probably should emulate the greatest poet of them all, William Shakespeare. lol
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smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1842 on: April 24, 2016, 03:07:56 pm »

So... Austria is having it's Presidential elections today (their system is a Parliamentary one, so the President is really more of a figurehead): http://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/apr/24/austrian-far-right-wins-first-round-presidential-election-norbert-hofer

I looked at wiki and he seems like he might be a generally nice guy, but very little info to go on. He'd certainly be popular with the pro-gun crowd though.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1843 on: April 24, 2016, 05:35:45 pm »

(in muslim culture, hitting someone with a shoe is the worst insult you can make. That, and shoe rhymes with Haiku)
Let me tell you about Cossacks

Ukrainian Ranger

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #1844 on: April 24, 2016, 07:25:41 pm »

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