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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2126532 times)

GaxkangtheUnbound

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2670 on: September 28, 2010, 02:52:07 pm »

It was one of my first fortresses, set in a nice valley, lots of trees, magma and all sorts of other undead things. I was mining down until suddenly an announcement of interest came to me. My fish cleaner had apparently gone insane... What proceeded was the scariest moments my fortress ever had, no my fortress was slaughtered, not by demons, not by undead, by the fish cleaner. He killed all 30 of the population. I payed no attention to him going mad thinking my champions would slaughter him but no apparently it didn't happen like so.

So now I take great care not to piss off my fish cleaners. Their dangerous I tell you dangerous!
Fish cleaners are goblin insurgents.
"Oh please, fat dwarf!"
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Vhorthex

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2671 on: September 28, 2010, 06:58:42 pm »

Wow,

This one happened yesterday. And I have to say, i'm a little puzzled! lol

My dwarves initially placed the wagon atop a 1 Z level high hill along side a huge mountain. The hill was of decent size, so I decided to start digging on the side of the hill, and later change it to some kind of keep on top of the hill, with a moat all around. The idea was grand.

Well, I quickly reazlied that the level directly under the surface, was being used for my huge stockroom. Totally didn't think that through. So I said to myself, bahh wtver, i'll just make a keep for now and deal with the moat later.

So I build ramps and start building a draw bridge. Everything is... "going fine". Until, I get a nice message.

(Not sure of exactly what it said)

"A Collapse has occured!!"

I'm like woa! Bam the bridge that was being built breaks down, that or the floor tiles I was trying to build next to the ramps. In any case, it's not TOOO bad, the dust blew on one of the builders and he had "trouble breathing". I thought to myself Meh, i'll have to build supports.

Here was the stupid mistake, I didn't tell the builder to stop it with the bridge and or the floor tiles I was laying out. And BOOUM! Again, another collapse. Only this time, it literally broke through the ground and started spraying dust all over my Fortress first floor.

At this point I start panicking just a bit, since 1 of the legendary Masons got pretty beat up and was unconscious on the floor. As I'm building an emergency Hospital... (Yeah... didn't tell the builders to stop yet). BABOUM! Another colapse.

This time, it made a 1 X 3 hole on the surface, 1 X 2 hole on the first floor, and finally a 1 X 1 hole on the third floor. It sucked in a bunch of wood and ore, the legendary Mason and, some other dwarf. Oh and I forgot the dwarf that was having trouble breathing, I guess that last cloud of dust was too much, as he passed away right there.

So I CANCELLED those suicidal building orders and fortified my fortress.

I mean, I was prepping for the hordes of evil that would eventually befall my fortress. Not kill my dwarfs with funky architecture...

Like I mentioned earlier, I'm not sure if it was the bridge build order that was wonky, or the floor tiles? Or even a lack of support? I'm not all too sure about it.

In any case, the 2 other dwarfs survived after INTENSE surgery & bone setting. The worst was the legendary Mason who got both upper & lower arms SMASHED, and his right foot.

No idea who he manages today, but he seems to be ok lol.

Cheers,



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Plutoman

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2672 on: September 28, 2010, 07:05:31 pm »

I was making some catwalks, messed up a bit.  Thought it was no biggie, I'd just deconstruct them.  My manager at the time (also the one named after my girlfriend) decided to go do that for me.  Don't really know why, but ah well.

Got there, she went to the very end, deconstructed the one on the inside, promptly fell 7 stories and landed on my bookkeeper and a kid.  All died, though the bookkeeper and the kid took a while to bleed out.

I then passed on the information to my gf, that was interesting.  She told me that if I wanted to break up with her that there *were* better ways. -.-
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Boes

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2673 on: September 28, 2010, 07:07:15 pm »

I just found out that if you generate a world with zero caverns then there are no plants that allow you to make cloth or spider silk :-(
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xdarkcodex

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2674 on: September 28, 2010, 07:13:47 pm »

I was making some catwalks, messed up a bit.  Thought it was no biggie, I'd just deconstruct them.  My manager at the time (also the one named after my girlfriend) decided to go do that for me.  Don't really know why, but ah well.

Got there, she went to the very end, deconstructed the one on the inside, promptly fell 7 stories and landed on my bookkeeper and a kid.  All died, though the bookkeeper and the kid took a while to bleed out.

I then passed on the information to my gf, that was interesting.  She told me that if I wanted to break up with her that there *were* better ways. -.-
Haha you told your girlfriend she died? :o
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Plutoman

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2675 on: September 28, 2010, 08:15:34 pm »

I was making some catwalks, messed up a bit.  Thought it was no biggie, I'd just deconstruct them.  My manager at the time (also the one named after my girlfriend) decided to go do that for me.  Don't really know why, but ah well.

Got there, she went to the very end, deconstructed the one on the inside, promptly fell 7 stories and landed on my bookkeeper and a kid.  All died, though the bookkeeper and the kid took a while to bleed out.

I then passed on the information to my gf, that was interesting.  She told me that if I wanted to break up with her that there *were* better ways. -.-
Haha you told your girlfriend she died? :o

Yeah...  maybe not the best idea.  Then again, she's as much of a geek as I am.
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MaximumZero

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2676 on: September 28, 2010, 08:21:17 pm »

My wife once went berserk and brutally slaughtered both myself and our daughter, as well as all of our friends, before she was put down by a skeletal elk. She was last dorf standing, and as such, this was the end of our fortress.

All because I didn't have any leather.

She lol'd when I told her.
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sebs

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2677 on: September 29, 2010, 03:00:20 am »

I'm not a native speaker (as you may have noticed :) ). When I first saw a "hoary marmot" I assumed it was what is actually called a "mammoth", so I sent my military to kill this giant beast before it could do any damage. They killed it with only one hit, which made me think I had an extremely strong military...
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GaxkangtheUnbound

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2678 on: September 29, 2010, 05:32:07 am »

I'm not a native speaker (as you may have noticed :) ). When I first saw a "hoary marmot" I assumed it was what is actually called a "mammoth", so I sent my military to kill this giant beast before it could do any damage. They killed it with only one hit, which made me think I had an extremely strong military...
So you pitted 'em against magma men?
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Rastaan

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2679 on: September 29, 2010, 07:04:03 am »

Trying desperately to save the life of my dehydrated miner (who is resting in the hospital), by building wells, buckets, cancelling jobs, assigning and re-assigning labours on my lazy and heartless idlers; only to realise that I'd completely walled off the entire hospital.

Turns out I'm a freudian bastard.
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bremarv

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2680 on: September 29, 2010, 02:03:15 pm »

started my new/first magma pump, going all the way up. forgot that all of the map have an aquafier at some point, so got a 50z or so waterfall. the levels from cavern 3 down to the magma sea is now mostly 7/7.

3 people, a legendary engraver  >:(, a high skilled miner and a random dwarf got flushed down the hole I was using for magma glass smelter

edit: another 2 facepalms

1: starts building walls to stop the aquafier. in the name of efficency I dig out lots of the dirt wall at once, increasing the water pouring out and making it even harder for the masons afterwards.

2: forgot to use magma safe rock. I will have to tear this wall down sometime later and build one thats magma safe :(
« Last Edit: September 29, 2010, 02:35:56 pm by bremarv »
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JAFANZ

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2681 on: September 29, 2010, 03:34:26 pm »

2: forgot to use magma safe rock. I will have to tear this wall down sometime later and build one thats magma safe :(
Walls, being Constructions, are inherently Magma-safe, you could build a Wall out of Ice & magma wouldn't be able to melt it.

Magma-safe is a concern for Buildings (e.g. Doors, Floodgates, Bridges, etcetera), Magma Workshops, & Mechanisms.

Ok, and anything else you want to immerse in magma but recover intact (e.g. bins of lignite).
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Jordrake

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2682 on: September 29, 2010, 03:58:10 pm »

Just embarked in a temperate biome, which meant snowy winters. My caravan happens to land halfway on top of a frozen pool. I couldn't tell at first because of the snow covering, but I realized a little later that both have my goods and my temporary butchers were on top of a frozen pool. So I deconstruct my butcher's and set up a refuse stockpile for the wolf bones and fat. Nobody felt the need to move them there, but no big deal. The pool melts, but my losses are minimal. Or so I thought.
I was setting up my metal industry. I built two smelters, one for coke and one for ore. Then I started building a forge.
No access to fire-safe anvil.
Then it hit me.
It was in the lake.
That's my metalworking industry dead until the winter.
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FuzzyDoom

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2683 on: September 29, 2010, 04:11:09 pm »

Just embarked in a temperate biome, which meant snowy winters. My caravan happens to land halfway on top of a frozen pool. I couldn't tell at first because of the snow covering, but I realized a little later that both have my goods and my temporary butchers were on top of a frozen pool. So I deconstruct my butcher's and set up a refuse stockpile for the wolf bones and fat. Nobody felt the need to move them there, but no big deal. The pool melts, but my losses are minimal. Or so I thought.
I was setting up my metal industry. I built two smelters, one for coke and one for ore. Then I started building a forge.
No access to fire-safe anvil.
Then it hit me.
It was in the lake.
That's my metalworking industry dead until the winter.

Drain the pool. Dig down next to it, make a smallish room, and drain said pool into the room. TaDa! you have your anvil back.
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Also bear in mind that dwarves have their heads at a perfect height for a good face-kicking.
That's the great thing about this forum. We can derail any discussion into any other topic.

Jordrake

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #2684 on: September 29, 2010, 04:13:59 pm »

Just embarked in a temperate biome, which meant snowy winters. My caravan happens to land halfway on top of a frozen pool. I couldn't tell at first because of the snow covering, but I realized a little later that both have my goods and my temporary butchers were on top of a frozen pool. So I deconstruct my butcher's and set up a refuse stockpile for the wolf bones and fat. Nobody felt the need to move them there, but no big deal. The pool melts, but my losses are minimal. Or so I thought.
I was setting up my metal industry. I built two smelters, one for coke and one for ore. Then I started building a forge.
No access to fire-safe anvil.
Then it hit me.
It was in the lake.
That's my metalworking industry dead until the winter.

Drain the pool. Dig down next to it, make a smallish room, and drain said pool into the room. TaDa! you have your anvil back.
It's late. I totally didn't think of that.
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