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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2126595 times)

Musashi

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3165 on: November 27, 2010, 06:05:31 am »

no patient died of anything but friggin' thirst.
I have a bit water on the surface, I have plenty of water in the caverns, I have enough buckets for a lifetime, and the only reason I have no well is that most of the workforce eventually ends up at the hospital, and even if they don't die there, they can waste a year or two before anyone correctly diagnoses and heal them.
Worst healthcare system ever.
Maybe it have something to do with the fact that crutch-walking isn't working so anyone with leg injury can't do anything (IF a hospital exists THEN must rest), especially not crawl to the kitchen. And one broken wrist of course stops a dwarf from walking to the food and booze area!

Hmm maybe could have tried turning all healthcare labors on for all dwarves. Or delete the hospital zone and remove beds for force people up? Hmm I should try that sometime.
Leg injury: trust me, only half my dwarfs have leg injuries, and because I swear every single guy here has some kind of scar on their body, they heal relatively well, as they keep working as intended. I'm not gonna enter the matter of hands.
Turning all healthcare labors on? That's exactly what I did since the start of the very fort! I even learnt the lesson the had a couple dwarfs completely devoted to the patients! But nooooooo
I even remember, back in .16, one marksdwarf that had been turned into a booze-scented pincushion thanks to an unfortunate encounter with goblins was resting in the hospital and generally ignored by the doctors past some basic care. He had one leg broken, the other maimed, and was already suffering of an infection, so I hadn't much hope left for him anyway. What did he do? Under the fallacy of fetching his equipment, he dragged his sorry ass to a random pile of booze, and gulped down a barrel or two. Then he cancelled everything repeatedly and died among his beloved barrels. He still needed further care.
So, yeah.  :-X
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I don't mean to alarm you, but it appears that your Dwarves are all in fact elephants.

Icee77

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3166 on: November 27, 2010, 05:03:28 pm »

Playing Genesis when elephants come in. Remembering all the tales of horror, i sent my entire military. They killed the elephant very very very fast. then my obsidian dwarf breathed fire and killed off the other elephants....
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Lolzwheejars

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3167 on: November 27, 2010, 05:03:48 pm »

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Zidane

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3168 on: November 27, 2010, 05:54:47 pm »

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Give cats natural metallic armor and throw them in your danger room.  Also allow their mouth and tail to grasp (shield in mouth, weapon in tail xD)  Have a cat based military.  You know, do the same with all tame animals xD send in the cats as shock troops to disrupt the archers

Lolzwheejars

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3169 on: November 27, 2010, 06:58:20 pm »



But... It's a badass crutch!

Wouldn't be so bad if dwarves actually used crutches :P
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Oglokoog

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3170 on: November 27, 2010, 07:16:35 pm »

Heh, now I have a legendary...WHAT?!
He's a legendary friggin' LYE MAKER.  WHAT is that good for?!?
Making lye, which you can then use to make soap. If any of your dwarves get injured, the soap he helped create will save many lives that infection would otherwise claim.
EDIT: Damn, should've read the rest of the thread. Sorry guys! I guess this counts as a facepalm moment :D
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So we got monsters above, monsters below, dwarves in the middle and a party in the dining hall. Sounds good to me.
If all else fails, remember one thing:  kittens are delicious, nutritious little goblin-baiters, cavern explorers, and ambush-finders.

Reese

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3171 on: November 27, 2010, 07:51:24 pm »



But... It's a badass crutch!

Wouldn't be so bad if dwarves actually used crutches :P

Just wait until a dwarf can use a crutch in combat and use their crutch walker skill the same way a pick can be used in combat and use the mining skill...
(ok, maybe that won't happen, but you never know :P)
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All glory to the Hypno-Toady!

twilightdusk

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3172 on: November 27, 2010, 10:58:07 pm »

Getting distracted halfway through embark, and as a result giving two of my dwarves woodcutting in terrain with no wood.
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A man would see that as a difficult challenge.
An elf would see that and despair.
A dwarf would see that and say, "Bring it on."

Urist McUristy

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3173 on: November 27, 2010, 10:59:23 pm »

Getting distracted halfway through embark, and as a result giving two of my dwarves woodcutting in terrain with no wood.
Theres always caverns.
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twilightdusk

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3174 on: November 27, 2010, 11:13:32 pm »

Getting distracted halfway through embark, and as a result giving two of my dwarves woodcutting in terrain with no wood.
Theres always caverns.

doesn't reduce the level of facepalm I had when I started looking around for trees to chop...
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A man would see that as a difficult challenge.
An elf would see that and despair.
A dwarf would see that and say, "Bring it on."

iyaerP

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3175 on: November 28, 2010, 02:43:22 am »

Getting distracted halfway through embark, and as a result giving two of my dwarves woodcutting in terrain with no wood.
Theres always caverns.

doesn't reduce the level of facepalm I had when I started looking around for trees to chop...

so just dig straight down to the first cavern layer.

What could possibly go wrong?

facepalm moment for myself: send my entire army out to fight my first ever bronze collossus. Two naked recruits are the first to arrive and are curbstomped into the ground. As they are new immigrants and thus have no skills or friends, I could care less. What I DO care about however, is that 2 of my five legendary fighters managed to dodge into a 3-tile-square murky pool. The BC followed them in. So two of my best military dwarves drowned in a fight where up till that point, they had not yet taken a scratch. And now their corpses are unrecoverable. Along with all their adamantine gear and the BC's statue.
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Christ, are you dwarves or are you elves? If you think Hell has too many demons, then youkill them till the population reaches an acceptable number.
Dwarf Fortress: So horrifying the players would rather talk about nice things, like Warhammer 40k.

Samuel

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3176 on: November 28, 2010, 05:20:44 am »

For the first time in a stupidly long time, a Strange Mood Dwarf has claimed a shop other than a craftsdwarf shop.

He was already suffering from thirst when he got the mood.

Figures.
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Oglokoog

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3177 on: November 28, 2010, 05:36:10 am »

For the first time in a stupidly long time, a Strange Mood Dwarf has claimed a shop other than a craftsdwarf shop.
He was already suffering from thirst when he got the mood.
Figures.

I think dwarves don't need to drink when they have a mood. Their hunger and thirst get suspended until they finish the artifact or go insane. I might be wrong, though.

facepalm moment for myself: send my entire army out to fight my first ever bronze collossus. Two naked recruits are the first to arrive and are curbstomped into the ground. As they are new immigrants and thus have no skills or friends, I could care less. What I DO care about however, is that 2 of my five legendary fighters managed to dodge into a 3-tile-square murky pool. The BC followed them in. So two of my best military dwarves drowned in a fight where up till that point, they had not yet taken a scratch. And now their corpses are unrecoverable. Along with all their adamantine gear and the BC's statue.

What's stopping you from channeling out a few tiles around the murky pool? Is it made from slade?
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So we got monsters above, monsters below, dwarves in the middle and a party in the dining hall. Sounds good to me.
If all else fails, remember one thing:  kittens are delicious, nutritious little goblin-baiters, cavern explorers, and ambush-finders.

Samuel

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3178 on: November 28, 2010, 05:42:49 am »

For the first time in a stupidly long time, a Strange Mood Dwarf has claimed a shop other than a craftsdwarf shop.
He was already suffering from thirst when he got the mood.
Figures.

I think dwarves don't need to drink when they have a mood. Their hunger and thirst get suspended until they finish the artifact or go insane. I might be wrong, though.

You appear to be correct. He got all the way through completion of a granite coffin worth 384000. I used a burrow on my stone pile while building a tanner's workshop to give him the hide he needed.
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UnrealJake

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #3179 on: November 28, 2010, 06:01:22 am »

Speaking of strange moods, after my master mason killed himself on a pile of traps becuase I didn't get him any metal [Stupidly, I forgot I didn't need an anvil to make the metal, so I let him die] and after a string of other Dwarves taking other promising workshops with promising proffesions who all died, I managed to get my first artifact in this fort. A metal spit. I then got a dog bone bracelet [Damn bugs] and a bucket.

A bucket.

Worst of all, most of them were possessed so they got no XP as well.
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Huochong sounds like what you hear when a ninja hits somebody with a frying pan.

"HUOOOOOOOOOO-"
*CHONG*
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