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Author Topic: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves  (Read 1498759 times)

Jacob/Lee

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2595 on: December 16, 2011, 07:32:59 pm »

Dear Urist McConstantlySiegingDemonsCentaursandSerpentfolk,

FUCK OFF

Yours,
Oilbeaches

Tcei

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2596 on: December 16, 2011, 08:06:06 pm »

Dear Urist Mcformermother,

You have no right to be upset over the loss of your baby. You are a farmer; you had no reason to go down into the flooding tunnel.
Enjoy being haunted by your babies ghost.
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....They just refuse to stay down unless butchered, in which case their skins will haunt you until you subdue and tan them. Never has legendary butcher and legendary tanner seemed so valueable as in this release.

Theifofdreams

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2597 on: December 17, 2011, 01:21:26 am »

Dear Urist McRecruit
I have no idea what inspired you to fetch a barrel, carry it to the barracks, then realize the barrel isn't suppose to go there and take it back. It was odd the first time. The fifth time made me suddenly very, very happy that you'd been sent into the military, where your death will most likely be agonizingly terrible.
Your eventual sacrifice will, hopefully, be put to good use.

Your confused and bemused Overseer

Keldor

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2598 on: December 17, 2011, 07:18:47 am »

Dear Urist McRecruit
I have no idea what inspired you to fetch a barrel, carry it to the barracks, then realize the barrel isn't suppose to go there and take it back. It was odd the first time. The fifth time made me suddenly very, very happy that you'd been sent into the military, where your death will most likely be agonizingly terrible.
Your eventual sacrifice will, hopefully, be put to good use.

Your confused and bemused Overseer

Dear confused and bemused,

Ye gave us orders te carry food an' drink with us at all times but ye didnae give us wineskins te hold it with, so I had te improvise a wee bit.  Hope ye like it!

Your Obdient,
-Urist McRecruit
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If ignorance is bliss, why are my dwarves all tantruming?

Reudh

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2599 on: December 17, 2011, 07:22:31 am »

I always viewed that fetching a barrel behaviour was like the dwarves way of saying 'I'm not going to join this fight, i'm too scared.'

jamesadelong

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2600 on: December 17, 2011, 08:47:46 am »

I always thought they used them for tackling practice. I imagine a barrel would be almost the same size as them.
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Quote from: Oliolli
Quote from: Dohon
Dwarf Fortress: where good advice confuses new players and bad advice makes the Geneva Conventions scream out in pain.

PijanySmok

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2601 on: December 17, 2011, 11:37:06 am »

Dear Urtist Broker
You are going to be slaughtered in butchery now, for ignoring that caravan. Thank you.
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Theifofdreams

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2602 on: December 17, 2011, 12:25:53 pm »


Dear confused and bemused,

Ye gave us orders te carry food an' drink with us at all times but ye didnae give us wineskins te hold it with, so I had te improvise a wee bit.  Hope ye like it!

Your Obdient,
-Urist McRecruit

Dear Urist McRecruit
There's a stack of 10 wineskins in the stockpile. Specifically. We traded a single =Gabbro Crown= for them. I remember it clearly. Noone else has taken any.
Why the barrel?

Still confused
Your overseer

Loud Whispers

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2603 on: December 17, 2011, 01:17:57 pm »

Dear Urist McRecruit
There's a stack of 10 wineskins in the stockpile. Specifically. We traded a single =Gabbro Crown= for them. I remember it clearly. Noone else has taken any.
Why the barrel?

Still confused
Your overseer

Union strike!

jamesadelong

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2604 on: December 17, 2011, 02:12:01 pm »

Dear Urist McRecruit
There's a stack of 10 wineskins in the stockpile. Specifically. We traded a single =Gabbro Crown= for them. I remember it clearly. Noone else has taken any.
Why the barrel?

Still confused
Your overseer

Union strike!

Hammerer! Strike the Unions!
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Quote from: Oliolli
Quote from: Dohon
Dwarf Fortress: where good advice confuses new players and bad advice makes the Geneva Conventions scream out in pain.

PijanySmok

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2605 on: December 17, 2011, 10:23:12 pm »

Dear Ice

Thank you for killing me 6 dwarves in a row.

Edit: +2 drowned

Dear Urtist FuckingSuicide

Thank you for ruining positions and killing whole fortress. Next time don't run like an idiot into whole swarm of goblins, just stand still. You fucking owe me 20h of gameplay.

Dear Urtist McBuilder

Fortress could survive if you built the bridge faster.
« Last Edit: December 17, 2011, 10:55:38 pm by PijanySmok »
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Theifofdreams

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2606 on: December 18, 2011, 12:42:10 am »

Armok, What have I done?!
Dear Ice

Thank you for killing me 6 dwarves in a row.

Edit: +2 drowned

Dear Urtist FuckingSuicide

Thank you for ruining positions and killing whole fortress. Next time don't run like an idiot into whole swarm of goblins, just stand still. You fucking owe me 20h of gameplay.

Dear Urtist McBuilder

Fortress could survive if you built the bridge faster.
Dear Overseer.
We thought ye could use ali'l more !Fun!, but it seems ye were nae ready for it.
Apologies.
Yers, Ice, Urist McBuilder an' Urist Fuckingsuicide

Callista

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2607 on: December 18, 2011, 02:30:06 am »

Dear Urist McHunter,

I won't say you haven't been doing your job... but the food stores are empty, the carpenter just starved to death, and there is a wild moose in the meeting hall.

Yours,
An Exasperated Overseer
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Nyxalinth

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2608 on: December 19, 2011, 01:02:01 am »

Dear Dwarves of Ringtool,

Oops.  I knew there'd be skeletal marmots, but I didn't even imagine skeletal yaks.  Sorry about that :(.  If it helps, you fought bravely.

Your former overseer
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Nyxalinth likes the color blue, gaming, writing, art, cats for their aloofness,  Transformers for their sentience and ability to transform, and the Constructicons for their hard work and building skills. Whenever possible, she prefers to consume bacon cheeseburgers and pinot noir. She absolutely detests stupid people.

Mercur1c

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2609 on: December 19, 2011, 03:06:46 am »

Dear Urist Mc NoviceMiner,
It is more important for you to dig a tunnel into the reservoir, in which our legendary miner is starving and dehydrated and hunting vermin for food, than hauling stones to the stockpile, which many other dwarves are doing.
-The Overlord

P.S. I know where you sleep. On the floor, quit complaining
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