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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2126581 times)

person012345

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6600 on: July 06, 2012, 12:43:55 pm »

Break into caverns
Set up mining operation for slate
Flying forgotten beast appears
Keep civilians out
Forget about beast
Send civilians in
Civilians get slaughtered horribly
Tantrum spiral

The worst thing was, as soon as my military arrived they dispatched it no problem. It tried to bite them, got deflected by their armour, they stabbed it in the lung and chopped off it's head. That was a pretty badass military. 2 spearmen and 2 axemen, took out about 3 forgotten beasts/titans without even breaking a sweat. To be fair, one of those was made of snow, so all that required was a single punch and it disintegrated into a puddle of water, but the other two were fairly menacing. But still, fortress ended in a nasty tantrum spiral. Ironically it was finished off by the berserking captain of the guard (those 4 dwarfs in the guard were my entire military at the time).
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HavingPhun

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6601 on: July 06, 2012, 05:35:33 pm »

I had just started a embark and it was wierd because when I first opened the embark map I was right on the kind of place I wanted to start in. But anyways I had a quantum garbage dump to clean up the stone to make room for stockpiles and rooms and i put stairs on it so if someone fell in they could walk out. Somehow my ranger ended up in there and people dropped stones on him. He died of dehydration, even though I had the fresh water marked for the morons.
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Frontestro

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6602 on: July 06, 2012, 06:20:01 pm »

I had just started a embark and it was wierd because when I first opened the embark map I was right on the kind of place I wanted to start in. But anyways I had a quantum garbage dump to clean up the stone to make room for stockpiles and rooms and i put stairs on it so if someone fell in they could walk out. Somehow my ranger ended up in there and people dropped stones on him. He died of dehydration, even though I had the fresh water marked for the morons.

Fresh water!? No wonder he died of thirst.
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misko27

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6603 on: July 06, 2012, 06:33:13 pm »


Fresh water!? No wonder he died of thirst.
the dwarves will always choose water over death. Despite popular belief, Dwarves dont wish to die, their just incredibly bad at not doing so. I've seen a determined dwarf desperately try to outrun a squad of gobbos. He didn't make it, but I sure enjoyed the show. There are legends of dwarves hiding from horrifying things, the end of headshoots proves that.
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The Age of Man is over. It is the Fire's turn now

Snaake

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6604 on: July 06, 2012, 06:51:40 pm »

Break into caverns
Set up mining operation for slate
...

Just out of curiousity: why were you mining for slate?
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Shininglight

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6605 on: July 06, 2012, 07:56:27 pm »

Every time for the last 27 worlds i've generated. not once NOT ONCE have i gotten flux without an aquifer.... argh. Of course my attempts to work through the aquifers result in this as well. I've read all the wiki articles.... still can't get through an aquifer.
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tl;dr: My fortress is literally powered by puppy skulls.

Frontestro

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6606 on: July 06, 2012, 09:00:23 pm »

Every time for the last 27 worlds i've generated. not once NOT ONCE have i gotten flux without an aquifer.... argh. Of course my attempts to work through the aquifers result in this as well. I've read all the wiki articles.... still can't get through an aquifer.

Use the specific search to narrow it down. Clay never holds aquifers so if I don't want to contend with that I just put Clay:Yes Flux:Yes Shallow Metals. Etc. Unless You mean that even with the search you don't have any then that is just horrible luck....
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BinaryBeast1010011010

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6607 on: July 06, 2012, 11:48:48 pm »

Since I discovered quantum menace two slits method I never embarked without an aquifer. It took me a few shots and I am not wiser than anyone here but ever since I have enjoyed
 an infinite supply of water  easy waterfalls everywhere, underground crops wherever I wanted them, and many more wondrous things!
And not to derail the thread, among those things : dead cats preventing the closure of the well floodgate and flooding the dining room. Curse them! Things went even worst when the dwarf adopted by said cat started tantruming.
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cant stop playing DF?
 : (){ :|:& };:

Joben

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6608 on: July 08, 2012, 05:07:43 am »

A goblin siege catches me with my pants down. Long story short, ~200 casualties later I'm down to 42 dwarves huddled in a basement. Blood EVERYWHERE. And apprently only two enemies left on the map

One soldier left.

I order him to kill a goblin that's decided to hide in a corner. ...nothing happens.

Turns out he is inside one of my cage traps at the main entrance. what the i don't even...I check his thoughts.

Quote
Unib Sazirsakrith has been quite content lately. He has complained of thirst lately. He has been tired lately. He has lost a spouse to tragedy recently. He admired a fine Trap lately. He dined in a legendary dinging room recently. He recieved water recently. He slept in a very good bedroom recently. He gave someone water lately. He is depressed about being confined. He sustained major injuries recently.

Go figure and facepalm!
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Broken Arrow - A small stats tweak to fix unrealistically overpowered arrows and bolts.

My RTD games: Roll To Raptor (On hold), Dino Arena

crazysheep

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6609 on: July 08, 2012, 06:06:35 am »

... He admired a fine Trap lately. ... He is depressed about being confined. [/size]
[/quote]
Unib: Ow why is my head spinning and why is there so much blood all over me? *twinges in pain* Wow this is a really lovely *Cage* I'm in.. why am I caged again? :(
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"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, for there's nothing a kid can't do."

Snateraar

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6610 on: July 08, 2012, 07:54:41 am »

I put a mason on repeat making stone chairs. I went on playing and forgot about it. Suddenly I notice all my furniture stockpiles littered with chairs, even some made out of the precious marble(don't have any flux except that) and I found out he made about 172 stone chairs  :-X
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Urist McSnate likes malachite, copper bars, birds and goblinite for its abundance. When possible, he prefers to consume tea and toast. He absolutely detests elves.

A tall, clumsy creature fond of birds and industry.

Hanslanda

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6611 on: July 08, 2012, 11:10:25 am »

Hehehe, you've encountered the Mug Tipping point. A job on repeat is useful and productive until your (crafter) hits legendary, and then the production speed is ridiculous. With such a high production speed, even a short amount of time not paying attention results in hideous amounts of whatever selected object is being created. Weaponizable amounts.
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Well, we could put two and two together and write a book: "The Shit that Hans and Max Did: You Won't Believe This Shit."
He's fucking with us.

Splint

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6612 on: July 08, 2012, 11:37:18 am »

Dear god, the Spearbreakers manufacturing curse is spreading....

krenshala

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6613 on: July 08, 2012, 01:43:39 pm »

Decided to try the "bring ore and fuel instead of finished products" embark strategy to see how well I'd do with it.

Embarked in a decent spot, looked around, assigned a few missing labors, then unpaused so they could get to work.

Only to have an alligator leap out, maul a llama's head (still wounded a year later), try to rip of the left foot of one of the two Farmers, and killed one of my two female dogs before I was able to punch it to death with six dwarves (and two dogs chewing on it).  All on the 1st of Granite.

A normal embark, I would have had four weapons to use on it.  Instead, I have to resort to an unarmed mob to try and bring it down.  I've no idea how I managed to get away with so few injuries.
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Quote from: Haspen
Quote from: phoenixuk
Zepave Dawnhogs the Butterfly of Vales the Marsh Titan ... was taken out by a single novice axedwarf and his pet war kitten. Long Live Domas Etasastesh Adilloram, slayer of the snow butterfly!
Doesn't quite have the ring of heroics to it...
Mother: "...and after the evil snow butterfly was defeated, Domas and his kitten lived happily ever after!"
Kids: "Yaaaay!"

Snaake

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #6614 on: July 08, 2012, 04:15:17 pm »

Decided to try the "bring ore and fuel instead of finished products" embark strategy to see how well I'd do with it.

Embarked in a decent spot, looked around, assigned a few missing labors, then unpaused so they could get to work.

Only to have an alligator leap out, maul a llama's head (still wounded a year later), try to rip of the left foot of one of the two Farmers, and killed one of my two female dogs before I was able to punch it to death with six dwarves (and two dogs chewing on it).  All on the 1st of Granite.

A normal embark, I would have had four weapons to use on it.  Instead, I have to resort to an unarmed mob to try and bring it down.  I've no idea how I managed to get away with so few injuries.

Sure, blame it on the lack of weapons. I remember a guy complaining that he had an alligator kill multiple embarks/reclaims worth of dwarves (and he bought 2-4 armed ones each time, I think).
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