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Author Topic: RAW travesties and Cyberbrains: Oh hey, this thread exists  (Read 255874 times)

PTTG??

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #180 on: March 23, 2010, 12:18:05 am »

Is there a thread for other travesties?

Nah, but you can put them here. Maybe combine them with DF travisties. "It was a dark and stormy:HAMMERDWARF:PANTS_PANTS_PANTS:10000]"
« Last Edit: July 29, 2015, 02:34:48 pm by PTTG?? »
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Odd!x

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #181 on: March 23, 2010, 02:39:23 am »

I have no idea what's going on in here, but I'm laughing so hard I'm crying :*D
can I get an explanation of this hysterical nonsense?
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Haspen

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #182 on: March 23, 2010, 02:40:41 am »

I have no idea what's going on in here, but I'm laughing so hard I'm crying :*D
can I get an explanation of this hysterical nonsense?

You put game raws into this:

http://www.eskimo.com/%7Erstarr/poormfa/travesty.html

And you post whatever nice bits it spits out.
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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #183 on: March 23, 2010, 02:55:49 am »

[BIOME:NOT_BUTCHERABLE] good to know.  Don't butcher the outdoors, kids!
[GNAWER:gnawed] redundant, but good to know as well
[WEBBER:gnawed] sounds sticky
[SPEED:900] I don't know how speed works in this game, but this is either REALLY FAST or REALLY SLOW
[GRASSTRING:gentle buzz] sounds lovely?
[BODYGLOSS:INSECT:BODY:2LUNG:right flipper arm] UGH WHAT IS THAT
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Haspen

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #184 on: March 23, 2010, 03:03:36 am »

[SPEED:900] I don't know how speed works in this game, but this is either REALLY FAST or REALLY SLOW

The lower number in raws, the faster speed in game. However, [SPEED:1000] is 'default' value ;P

So just a little bit faster.
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Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
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Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Sean Mirrsen

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #185 on: March 23, 2010, 03:27:30 am »

I found these hilarious:
[MATGLOSS_SAME_SUPPORT:ANY_GREATH_BRIDGE] - Special bridge material?
[WEAPON:BREAKING:knuckle nature] - Knuckle nature. Breaking weapon. Let me guess, Knuckles the Echidna?
[MATGLOSS_STONE:CLUSTIFICELLOW] - Clustificellow. I gotta write it down somewhere.
[PERMITTED_JOB:POTASH_CARF_HEAD_CONSTONE:CLUSTER_SMALL:SIEGE:NAME:ANY_SAPIENTARY:CLUSTER] - After a little thought, it seems the job is to throw small clusters of potash stones at the heads of sapient-ish creatures that come in large clusters during a siege. Huh. Makes sense.
[ETHIC:TORTURE_AS_EXILE:15] - This, however, I don't know. Exile as torture maybe, but torture as exile?
[COLOR:ITEM_SHOES:ITEM_IMPROGREEZING:PERMITTED_JOB:GLASSION:ITEM_WEAPON_CLOTHERBANDALIGION_SWORD_SHIER:PUNISH_CAN_LEAD:ARTZ_ROCK] - Alright, I'm not going to even try. Improgreezing items sound neat though. And artz definetly rock.
[MATGLOSS_STONE:MOUNDER] - Special stone for mounds.
[CHILD:ITEM_TRAPCOMMON] - This is just cruel. Both in "Child as bait in trap" and "Child as trapcomponent" meanings.
[SIEGE:VIOLENTURQUOIST] - If I'm sieged by violent turquoise ventriloquists, I'm leaving.
[WANDARK_FOR_LEARTIFIER:512] - Wandark for Leartifier! Don't let our country's fate be decided by fools, vote now!
[ENVIRONMENT:IGN] - Well, it's not Gamespy, at least.
[SIEGE:NAME_SUPPORT:METAMON] - This siege supports Digimon.
[GEM:harlequirrel] - You dig it out, it mocks you, then steals your nuts (ow!) and burrows back in.
[LARGE_EVIL] - Elephants. Demons, to a lesser extent.
[PERMITTED_JOB:FISH_CLOTHERER] - We just found a job more despised than the fish cleaner.
[trAPCOMP_MENACINGS:COMMON] - The dwarfiest tag after [HAS_BEARD].

Haspen

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #186 on: March 23, 2010, 03:30:38 am »

[PERMITTED_JOB:FISH_CLOTHERER] - We just found a job more despised than the fish cleaner.

Now I'm wondering if it means dwarf making clothes from dead fish scales or dwarf dressing dead fishes in clothes...
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Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Sean Mirrsen

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #187 on: March 23, 2010, 03:34:35 am »

It's a dwarf catching fish, dressing them in clothes, and letting them go. A piscine fashion designer, as it were.

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #188 on: March 23, 2010, 03:31:13 pm »

Interestingly, when I type "tra" in my address bar, the two sites I use for text mangling are always on top - "Translation Party" and "Travesty Generator". Unfortunately, Translation Party doesn't make fun raws.

[ETHIC:KILL_ENGRASP:pulsation]
[trIBUTCHER] - Butchering with a trebuchet? Or just triple-butchering?
[USE_BOOTS_STONE] - Mafia at its finest.
[SPEC:SLUGMANOID] - I'm still waiting for Graboids, but this is rather close.
[USE_ANTS:COMMON] - That's nothing. Fear the civ that has [USE_BEES:COMMON]!
[TILE:CHRYST] - Going religious?
[CREASON:PUMPERCUSSING:gent, sourmaline:STP] - Okay, doesn't really make sense, but PUMPERCUSSING made me lol.
[SMELTINEER] - A pioneer of smelting?
[SMELTING:stal hunger bars] - Stal hunger bars. ("Stal'" is russian for "steel") Very dwarven food.
[SMALL_ACTION:ITEM_WEAVE_AS_EXILE:100:2:BAR:VIOLENT:1:7:0:7:1] - Remember "torture as exile"? This is probably worse.
[WEAPON_SWORD_FLESHWATER_SMALL_ACTIVE_SUCKLER] - It's a small, active flesh-water suckler sword. I'm not sure I want to be on either end of it.
[NAME:acornamen:slugmantom spiders] - Slugmantom spiders. Yuck.
[REACTIVE_SEASON:SPRING:PUNISH_DISSECTOR] - The poor dissectors have already taken their share of punishments in this thread.
[PERMIN_GROUNDERSWIMS_INTRUSIVE:CLUSTER_SMALL:NAME:perch:perch:punch:punch:perch:punch:punch:perch] - It's like you have a fish in one hand, and nothing in the other - punch, perch, perch, punch!
[SHIELD:ITEM_WEAPON_HAVE_ANIMAL_TROPHY_SAVAGE] - Using a weapon that's stuck in an animal as a shield. Impractical, but awesome.
[ETHIC:TORTURE_FOR_FUN:UNCOMMON_DOMESTIC] - Uh... BDSM?
[SOLID_DENSITY:EVIL:0] - How dense could it be if its density is described as "evil"? :0
[ATTACK_BRONZE_MAKING] - I suppose you attack a Colossus with it.
[VERMITTED_JOB:POTASH_MAKING:creepiness] - So THAT's what's wrong with potash making!
[PENETRATES_SHOES:ITEM_HELM:ITEM_WEAPON:ITEM_INSTRUCTION:ROSE_GOLD] - I know a lot of other things that penetrate shoes, but these are probably the most common.
[ENVIRONMENT_DRUM] - Ringworld?
[EXTRACTOR] - We require more Vespene Gas!
[liKES_SOCKS:COMMON] - I think this came up already, but it's worth repeating if it did.
[PANTS:ITEM_HELM_TURBAN:UNTOWARD] - Using pants as a turban is untoward, yes. The other way around is probably more uncomfortable though.

PTTG??

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #189 on: April 15, 2010, 07:32:32 pm »

From the new version RAWS

[ATTACK_PENETRATIONS]

[BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:STANDARD_HEAD:CHEEK:cheek]
This is the detail plan OF the detail plan. Fractal plans!

[MANNERISM_CHESTNUT:1:PUMPKIN:1:IRIS_EYE_GRAY:1:OCHRE:1:PALE_TEMPLATE]
My mannerism is chestnuts.

[ATTACK_CONTACT_PERC:2000000]
Two million percent!

[PET_EXEMPTIONS_FROM_ROT]
Yeah, you're definitely going to hope that your pets are at least mostly exempt from rot.

[SELECT_SYMBOL:REMAINING:reclusive them. Even back will use the empty-eyed skin:SINGULAR]
Not exactly sure here whether this is particularly coherent or particularly incoherent.

[NOPAIN]
This is a regular tag. I just wanted to say that when I saw it, I immediately thought [NOGAIN].

[PLUS_TL_GROUP:BY_CATEGORY:HEAD:SIDEBURNS:STANCE:700]
I think this is suggesting that you stand on your sideburns.

[SWIMS_INFECTION:SUMMER_WAR]
Why does this sound like a computer game title?

[BODY_DETAIL:NAIL:NAIL:NAIL]
[HAMMER:HAMMER:HAMMER]

[MENIAL_TEMPLATE]

[TSU_NOUN:nose]
[SUN_TSU_NOUN:art:war]

[MANNERISM_STRIKE]
Attack with Chestnut!

[BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:HUMANOID_RIBCAGE_PRETENSION_PERC:100:110:130:20]
For those of us with pretentious ribcages.

[INSTRUMENTS]
Every band should have this tag.

[BRAG_ON_KILL_PLANT:64]
 ...
« Last Edit: April 15, 2010, 08:30:53 pm by PTTG?? »
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Skie

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #190 on: April 15, 2010, 08:11:53 pm »

Dear god the last couple of posts. I can't remember a time in my life when I laughed as much.
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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #191 on: April 15, 2010, 08:13:16 pm »

Swims Infection: Summer War II: The Summering! Become one with the terrifying gangrenous pool Band-Aids! Strike the unsuspecting Cancun tourists!
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Sean Mirrsen

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #192 on: April 16, 2010, 03:32:53 am »

[ATTACK_SKY_BLUE:1500] - Bonus points for using a drill.

[ATTACK:BLACK_FLAIL:20] - Can I have a blue flail?

[ATTACK:EDGE/BLUE:2] - Apparently I can, but not a flail.

[ATTACK_COLOR:7:1] - And now it's white, too.

[USE_MATE:LIQUID:frozen be axes:NO_SUBORDINATE] - Something about using liquid mates that aren't subordinates... and frozen axes?

[NAME:blue garning donies] - It may just be an IFW, but it cracks me up.

[NAME:long horse's milk] - Longcat's big brother.

[SUBORD_LOW ZIRCOAL:1] Lower to obey cheese] - All glory to hypnocheese?

[TISSUE_NAME:puppied herry of ands.] - Sounds cute.

[PUS:LIQUID:hooved horse cheese] - And this sound awful.

[USE_MATE:LAY_CONTACK_SKIN:1:ECRU:1:DARD_MATE] - Uhh...

Typoman

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #193 on: April 16, 2010, 04:24:36 am »

this thread still cracks me up...
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Lobos

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Re: RAW travesties
« Reply #194 on: April 16, 2010, 04:55:03 am »

[ATTACK_VERB:kittens] You get kittens in the face.

[BONE:CHOCOLOR:6:0:2000] Your bones are 2000 percent chocolate.

[USE_MATE] You use your meatsheild friend as a natural resource.

[BLOOD:BY_TOKEN:LFTOE5:HAIR] Your left toes are made of hair.

[MILK:MILK:200] you milk the milk. I see nothing wrong.

[MULTIPLE_CHILD_BODY_APPEACH:1:DARK_TAUPE_PALE] Your children have multiple bodies composed entirely out of colors.
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