Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[timferius]

Just going to leave this here, courtesy of RPS. Figured it fits right in with this thread.
http://www.rockpapershotgun.com/2011/09/14/tripwire-if-you-cheat-well-tell-your-mom/

[Sensei]

Warning: this topic has not been posted in for at least 120 days.
Unless you're sure you want to reply, please consider starting a new topic.

I'm sure, motherfucker.

By popular demand, I'm back! Not that this'll be a regular thing. I got thinking about doing another segment when I tried out MapleStory. In particular
See that truncated, two line bar? This shit pisses me off. It's not actually an EULA, but it's long enough to be a warning. Given how money-grubbing and cash store driven Maple Story is, I figured there must be something good in their EULA. The text in the downloader is actually for Pando Media Booster. Don't worry- I'll cover that later. Let me say ahead of time that if you have Pando Media Booster on your computer, delete it immediately.

For those of you who don't know, Maple Story is an MMORPG by Nexon, a Korean dev/publisher that typified the image of Free to Play MMOs. Maple Story uses side-scrolling enviroments and 2D sprites- it's a relatively simple game, but it earned Nexon the success and funds that would later let them make many other games, such as Vindictus, Mabinogi, and Dungeon Fighter Online. If you've played, or complained about, free MMOs, you've probably encountered Nexon before. They're basically responsible for the success of the cash store format, for better or for worse- when you go on Maple Story's website, try to count the number of cash store ads without getting dizzy. I dare you. Well, actually there's seven.

Without further ado, here's the
Maple Story EULA!

This one should be relatively short- it works out to only 6 pages in Word. I also have to say, even though their site could be a little better designed for reading large documents, at least it's plain black text on a white background. Jury is out on whether the little character who follows you around with a link to the top of the page is annoying or not.

Preface
There's sort of a preface and a pre-preface on the site. Right away, it gets me wondering if I'm reading the right text. This is in the first bit:

This is the NXgames End User License Agreement that will apply to the latest ver. 0.8 of MapleStory Global.

Then, in the actual preface, it says:

NX reserves the right in its sole discretion at any time to change any of the terms and conditions contained in this Agreement.  Any changes to this Agreement will be effective UPON POSTING AT http://HTTP://WWW.MAPLEGLOBAL.COM.

So, they can change their EULA at any time, and they don't have to tell you. They just put it up on the website and it's effective.

The real scary part comes when you go to www.mapleglobal.com. There's just an empty white page that says:

Welcome to nginx!

So, basically, as of this posting, the server at Maple Global is fucked. Have they update since 10/18/2005? Who knows! I'll check again later though.

Lastly, in the preface you are told that Nexon, the game's publisher and developer, will be referred to as NXgames Corporation.

1. Definitions
A whole 424 words devoted to telling us what words mean!

In this section they cover some obvious stuff like that they're referring to MapleStory when they say 'game', and so on, as if someone would say "I was subject to harassment while playing Monopoly and an NXgames GM didn't help me!" This is pretty standard. Of note, "Software" includes data in the game such as character data and apparently game design stuff too, such as:

...titles, themes, objects, items, equipment, accessories, characters, character names, stories, dialog, catch phrases, locations, concepts, artwork, character inventories, structural or landscape designs, animations, sounds, musical compositions, audio-visual effects, storylines, character likenesses, text, moving pictures, or any other data adapted for use with or generated by the Game software.

Okay, I guess they didn't want to make a separate "data" definition, but...

...catch phrases...

HMMMM.

2. Grant of License; Restrictions
Limited Grant of License/Terms of Use:

NX hereby grants you a non-exclusive, nontransferable, nonsublicensable, limited right and license, during the Term, to access and use the Software, ...solely for your own personal use.

This is, as usual, the part of the EULA that says that you do not own the game or your account- it is a license. Note the non-word "nonsublicensable"- you can't grant anyone else access to your account, basically. I wonder how (or if) this will be affected by theEU ruling that games must be resell-able.

Restrictions: This is one big paragraph. The majority of it just states in a plethora of terms that you cannot re-sell the software, or any cash item you buy in the game. I wonder, are cash shop items no-trade in the game? It also states in many many terms that you cannot decompile/modify the game or create your own servers for it.

There's one clause in there that says you may not:

...perform, or release the results of, benchmark tests or other comparisons of the Software with other software or materials...

What the hell? Apparently, you can't monitor how much processing power the game is using compared to your other games. In fact, you'd be violating the EULA if you merely did so in private without releasing the information publicly, not that I see how they could know if you did. But seriously, what the hell.

One last one for this section, that was actually at the top of the paragraph:

You hereby acknowledge and agree that you shall not use the Software for any purpose other than playing purposes...

You hear that, gold farmers? And that goes for you too, Cuban terrorists trying to copy our encryption methods! (Note- this is something, as you see in some other EULA's with reflect US law, that the US is actually worried about.)

Grant of License in Your Materials: This section says that NX gets "a worldwide, royalty-free, non-exclusive, limited, perpetual, nontransferable right and license" to anything you say, do or contribute through their game. Fair enough; would be bizarre if they couldn't include pictures or your character or screenshots including something you said on their website. I have to wonder about the "nontransferable" bit though- does this mean that if they quote you on something you say online, and you publish what you said somewhere else, they can sue you? Or you can't sell your quote to another entity? At least it's only worldwide, and not Throughout the Universe, so if you live on the moon then you won't have to worry about it. Furthermore, they don't have rights to publish anything you say in advertisements shown in the moon colony. (Note- would this mean they don't have to right to any radio transmissions which ultimately leave Earth and can be intercepted outside of orbit?)

3. Service
This makes me think of a french teacher I had in high school who called homework "devoirs", which means duty, like you would say a soldier has duty or something.

Hosting: This just says that NX will host the service. Oh and that they can stop hosting the service at their own discretion without warning for any reason without reimbursement. NX giveth, and NX may taketh away!

Updates:

You hereby grant NX your express consent to provide Updates to you by any and all means, with or without your knowledge and/or consent.

Well, this makes sense for an MMO. It's not like you can play the game without updating, anyway.

You acknowledge and agree that NX may, without your knowledge and/or consent, provide Updates to you remotely, including without limitation, by accessing the computer in which you store the Software.

In order to update your software, NX may "access" your computer. Now normally when I think of accessing, I think of reading data. Obviously they can write data too to update the game. This probably means they can check your current version of the software, but it also means that if a rogue NX employee took control of your computer and changed your wallpaper to a dirty picture of your spouse they found on your computer, hey, you said they could when you accepted the EULA!

Your Further Obligations: This just says that you're responsible for paying for your own computer and internet connection. Oddly, it's restated here that you're expected to follow the Terms of Service and their updates.

4. Proprietary Rights

Firstly, this section explains that NX retains all intellectual property write to their software and updates even if it's on your computer. I'll quote most of the section though, as it's rather weird:

You agree to take any action reasonably requested by NX to evidence, maintain, enforce or defend the foregoing rights.  You shall not take any action to jeopardize, encumber, limit or interfere in any manner with NX’s ownership of and rights with respect to the Software, or any Derivative Work or Update thereof or thereto.  You shall have only those rights in and to the Software... as are expressly granted to you under this Agreement or the Terms of Use.

This is weird- it seems to say that if the shit hits the fan, the EULA obligates you to help prove NX's legal ownership of the software even if the law does not. It also says that you can't do anything that would prevent NX from having ownership of the software, if you could. I neglected to mention in the "definitions" section- "Derivative Works" includes anything based on MapleStory at all, even if it's not made by NX.

"Derivative Work" means a new or modified work that is based on or derived from a preexisting work, including, without limitation, a work that, in the absence of a license, would infringe the copyright in such preexisting work or that uses trade secrets or other proprietary information with respect to such preexisting work.

Depending on how you take it, this means you're obligated to enforce NX taking control of modifications someone not working NX made to the software for some reason (EG somebody wrote a mod that makes the game more efficient) or anything related to MapleStory up to fanfiction, depending whether you read the copyright violation as a requirement or an option.

Lastly, the final sentence in this section (quoted above) seems to imply that you forgo rights to the software (NX's work) or derivative works (your mods and maybe fanfiction) even where your local law would give you rights to it.

5. Confidential Information

Confidential Information: It starts out by saying that you must acknowledge that you will receive confidential information that must remain between you and NX, so I figured that was referring to account passwords and the like. However... well let's just say it's list time. "Such Confidential Information shall, as between you and NX, belong solely to NX and shall include, without limitation...."

...the existence of and terms of this Agreement...

"Oh yes. This little "EULA" thing? That's just a secret between you and me. Don't tell your lawyer about that. Don't even tell him it exists."

...trade secrets, know-how, inventions (whether or not patentable)...

This is weird. I guess they mean that this is included in the program itself. Still... what? Also, it's a little weird that they expect you to keep their non-patentable inventions (I.E. an invention which is obvious, not useful, or not original) a "secret". Very greedy with the ideas, methinks. Very greedy.

...product requirements, problem reports, performance information...

The system requirements for the game? SECRET. DON'T TELL ANYBODY. Bugs you have while playing? SECRET. DON'T TELL ANYBODY. Game isn't running smoothly on your computer? You get the drill.

...algorithms, formulas, schematics...

"No discussing game specifics, guys. How exactly is damage calculated? We like to keep you guessing. Otherwise we can revoke your account and maybe sue you."

...business, product, marketing, third party customers, and financial information...

If any of these things -especially business and financial information- are supposed to be secret, they really shouldn't be telling it to every user who agrees to the EULA. I wonder if "financial information" means "other people's credit card numbers".

Use and Disclosure Restrictions: This explains that the secrets (IE everything in the list above, of which I have only quoted the most objectionable parts) are not to be used by you to develop your own software, that you must prevent dissemination or use of that information, and:

...not to disclose or otherwise provide to any third party, without the prior written consent of NX, any Confidential Information or any part or parts thereof...

Yeah, they want you to get written consent before telling people about your bug reports. Heh.

Exclusions: This explains that you are at liberty to discuss anything deemed confidential information if it's made public through reasons unconnected to you, or that you can prove with written records that you knew/developed it on your own before you could learn it from NX. Which seems normal and fine, until you realize that implies that if this section weren't here, then you'd have tort for any of that, including having an idea before NX and having written proof that you did.

6. NO WARRANTY/LIMITATION OF LIABILITY
This is the section that's in ALL CAPS.

Disclaimer of Warranties: There's no warranties, from anybody. And they mean ANYBODY:

NX AND ITS AFFILIATES, LICENSORS, SUPPLIERS, ADVERTISERS, SPONSORS, PARTNERS AND AGENTS...

Very thorough. You know, in case you thought their advertising agency or some random stockholders implied a warranty. Or, I suppose, if their advertisers or a random stockholder decided to speak out of their ass and say there really was a warranty, this would cover NX. It also says that you use the software entirely at your own risk and that you aren't warranted if the software server has viruses or the like (they did specifically mention viruses, in fact).

Limitation of Liability: Okay, this one's going to take some thinking. Thinking about where lawyers who write EULAs get all their fucking chutzpah.
First, it says NX is not responsible for any damage:

...INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, DAMAGES FOR LOSS OF BUSINESS, LOSS OF DATA OR LOST PROFITS), UNDER ANY CONTRACT, NEGLIGENCE, STRICT LIABILITY OR OTHER THEORY... EVEN IF NX... HAS BEEN ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES.

Okay, that's pretty brutal, but standard. They're trying to get you to sign off your rights to damages, even where NX has been found blatantly negligent.

Next though, they acknowledge that you might not be able to sign away those rights.

SOME JURISDICTIONS DO NOT ALLOW THE EXCLUSION OR LIMITATION OF INCIDENTAL OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES, SO THE ABOVE LIMITATION OR EXCLUSION MAY NOT APPLY TO YOU.

Having acknowledged that you might not be able to sign away your right to damage -keep that in mind- they say this:

THE SOLE AND EXCLUSIVE MAXIMUM LIABILITY TO NX FOR ALL DAMAGES, LOSSES AND CAUSES OF ACTION, WHETHER IN CONTRACT, TORT (INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, NEGLIGENCE) OR OTHERWISE, SHALL BE A MAXIMUM OF TWENTY U.S. DOLLARS.

Yes, fucking really. EVEN IF you charge them with negligence and a court finds that the EULA does not prevent you from doing so as it says, they want to limit the maximum charge for negligence to 20 DOLLARS. Some lawyer envisioned a scenario in which NX blatantly caused negligent damage to someone, had the section of their EULA preventing damages from being awarded struck down in court, and that same court ruling that because of the EULA, NX could owe no more reparation than $20. What. The. Fuck. It's almost cartoonishly villainous.

Other: This just appends that NX is not responsible for errors in the software stemming from modifying the software, running it on a computer that can't handle it, or using the software otherwise in neglect of the EULA.

7. Indemnification
The more of these I read, the scarier that word gets.

...actually, this section is just another redundant note that NX is not responsible for errors arising from using third party software or otherwise misusing the software. Interestingly, this includes "Your Materials". Anyone figure out a way to write your character name that causes the game to crash and potentially damage your computer?

8. Term and Termination
Sense and Sensibility

Firstly, in two chunks, this states that the terms of the EULA are in effect as soon as you press "I Accept" and end when NX says they end- either because you violated the terms, or because NX decided to terminate them "with or without cause". Once again, if you buy cash shop items or the like, it's scary knowing that NX could just shut your account down for no reason if they wanted to.

Effect of Termination: First, it says that when your terms of the EULA ends, you MUST remove the software from your computer, as well as any "Confidential Information" from earlier. I have no idea how they enforce that, because you can just download it at any time anyway. Furthermore:

Termination of this Agreement shall not act as a waiver of any breach of this Agreement and shall not act as a release of your liability for breach of your obligations under this Agreement.

Keep this is mind: NX can terminate their obligations to you, but there is no way, ever, for you to choose to cease your obligations to NX, especially in the event of a lawsuit or the like. Until the day you die. It redundantly states that the other sections of the EULA shall remain in effect through any termination of the agreement, and of course, that NX is not responsible for any losses to you as a result of termination (IE money you spent on the game).

9. General Provisions
This is a very, very long list of other notes that apply to the contract. It's the last section in here, aside from a post-note without a separate heading of its own.

Assignment: You can't assign someone else to the EULA. Not sure why this is in here, since NX spits out their EULA to literally every yahoo who wants to play their game and it very clearly refers to itself as being between the user and NX. Maybe it means that NX's obligations to the EULA (even though they can terminate them at will) don't extend to, say, someone else to whom you gave your account.

Governing Law, Jurisdiction, and Venue:

This Agreement shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of the State of California... Los Angeles County

Here they go again, choosing a place in California as the site of all their lawsuits because the law is favorable to them there. I don't see why this is legal, if neither they nor someone filing a suit is in Los Angeles. It also adds that this is "irrevocable" once you agree to the EULA.

This Agreement shall not be governed by the United Nations Convention on Contracts for the International Sale of Goods, the application of which is hereby expressly excluded.

I've seen this before: Guys, what the fuck. You can't just deny the United Nations on a whim. It's like, double irony that they try to not be governed by the Convention on Contracts. UN: "This contract is abusive, you can't enforce anything in it." NX: "Well, our contract can't be found abusive. It says so in the contract." Again: Chutzpah. And it's not like South Korea isn't a UN member or anything.

Attorneys’ Fees: Nothing unusual here, it just says that the loser or dismissed party in a suit pays all attorney's fees. Question for an actual lawyer: If an attorney files injunction for dismissal of a suit, does the party filing the suit normally pay attorney's fees?

Waiver: It says that if a breach of the EULA by either party is waived, it will not waive future breaches, including those of the same nature.

Severability: If you've been following the thread, you're familiar with this: It's the section that says if one part of the EULA is found invalid, the rest still stand. Every time I see this I wonder if this clause would be worth jack shit if a law said that a contract with any one unlawful part should be found wholly invalid (or vice verse, if it needs to be there if a court would normally cherry-pick unlawful sections).

Relationship of the Parties:

Nothing contained in this Agreement shall be deemed or construed as creating a joint venture, partnership, agency, employment or fiduciary relationship between the parties. ...and the relationship of the parties is, and at all times shall continue to be, that of independent contractors.

"Just because we signed a contract doesn't mean we're friends now."

Force Majeure: It's not NX's fault if they fail to provide service due to:

...acts of God, earthquake, fire, flood, embargoes, labor disputes and strikes, riots, war, acts of a public enemy, error in the coding of electronic files, Internet or other network "brownouts" or failures, power failures, novelty of product manufacture or other unanticipated product development problems, and acts of civil and military authorities.

I like how "novelty of product manufacture" is in there; it basically means "The product is hard to make, so we're late."

U.S. Government Rights: Refers to your rights with the software under US clauses "FAR 12.212 or DFARS 227.7202". Not reading those right now- they're long, dense and far less entertaining.

Export Controls: This says that you agree not to export the software to anywhere it would be prohibited under a US trade embargo, and that you are not in a location under the embargo yourself. Of course, I doubt NX actually stops you from playing merrily if you're in an embargoed nation, but they get to say "Well, he sure told us he wasn't under an embargo!"

Captions and Section Headings:

The captions and Section and paragraph headings used in this Agreement are inserted for convenience only and shall not affect the meaning or interpretation of this Agreement.

This... I... What? So meta...

Equitable Relief: This is probably the last scary section. It says that, because of the nature of NX's super secret programs, it would be difficult for them to measure the damage you could cause by breaching the EULA. And that:

...any such breach or threatened breach will allow you or third parties to compete unfairly with NX resulting in irreparable harm to NX that would be difficult to measure...

Keep in mind this apparently includes everything in here.

Get ready for the crazy bit...

...NX shall be entitled to injunctive and other appropriate equitable relief (without the necessity of proving actual damages or of posting a bond), in addition to whatever remedies it may have at law, hereunder, or otherwise.

Read that over again. Yes, you read it right. Apparently, under the force of the EULA, you are required to repay any perceived damages to NX without any proof or bond from them. And that's only under the rule of the EULA, in addition to any damages that may be found under actual laws. I... what? Well, if they really did ask for damages under the EULA, I guess it would just amount to "Pay us $10,000 or we'll ban your precious MapleStory character!"

Entire Agreement; Amendment: This is the last section that follows the normal heading format- we're almost through, folks! It's a brief paragraph that says the EULA supersedes anything else NX told you (like "We won't ban your account just to watch you cry.") Apparently it also overrides "all past dealings and industry custom". Which is weird. I guess that means they're not obligated to do anything they usually do. That's a little bit like a stock broker saying "Normally I wear a grey suit and buy your stocks with direct deposit transactions, but under this agreement you can't be sure that I'm not going to wrap myself up in toilet paper like a mummy and pay you with collectible coins." Eh, whatever.

There's still a little text left folks! Bear with me!

THE GAME AND SERVICE ARE AVAILABLE ONLY TO ADULTS (I.E., THOSE PERSONS 18 YEARS OF AGE OR OLDER) OR, IN THEIR DISCRETION, THE MINOR CHILD (NO YOUNGER THAN 13)...

Yeah, there's tons of unsupervised 10-year-olds clicking the "I Agree" button.

PARENTS OR GUARDIANS ARE LIABLE FOR ALL ACTIVITIES OF THEIR MINOR CHILD.

I wonder if they go after minor children's parents who they perceive have managed to violate their intellectual property by not giving them the rights to their fan fiction?

BY CLICKING ON THE "I ACCEPT" BUTTON BELOW, YOU ACKNOWLEDGE THAT (1) YOU HAVE READ AND REVIEWED THIS AGREEMENT IN ITS ENTIRETY,

I imagine that despite the massive amount of people who play Maple Story, you forum readers right here will make up a considerable portion of the people who have actually read the whole thing.

THIS AGREEMENT CONSTITUTES A BINDING AND ENFORCEABLE AGREEMENT.

"By pressing the "I Agree" button found on this Agreement, you agree to acknowledge that you agree to this Agreement, which is an Agreement."

AND THAT'S THE ENTIRE THING.

Jeeeesus. Long enough for you? I have to admit, I'm pretty impressed that I'm still finding lots of weird, objectionable, and outright scary things I haven't seen before. Now, I'm not planning to do regular installments of this again, but I do promise to do one on Pando Media Booster's (much shorter) EULA before I let this thread sink back a million pages again. Oh, and I tried mapleglobal.com again- now it's just coming up with a "server not found".

Now then- you presumably read the post. Discuss.

Edited: Forgot an image.

[Putnam]

Pando Media Booster...

*shudder*

what exactly does that claim to do, anyway?

[Scelly9]

$20, really? 

[Seriyu]

Pando Media Booster...

*shudder*

what exactly does that claim to do, anyway?

Pando media booster just seeds additional downloads of the specific game it's installed with, without your permission, which is kind've scummy but not really dangerous, unless your ISP threatens to break into your house and smack you around if you go over the bandwith cap.

[vagel7]

Super random with the Estonia thing in the xbox post. I actually read through the EULA for that, but was disappointed when I found nothing of it.

Is there actually such a thing as a "cooling off" period in use anywhere at all?

[Akura]

I've heard that PMB is malware, and I think it's tripped some of my anti-malware before, but I can't confirm this.

After reading the MapleStory EULA, though, I might be rethinking going back to some of Nexon's other games should I ever get internet back. And I liked playing Combat Arms. MapleStory not so much.

[Askot Bokbondeler]

what if we grouped together and wrote a perfectly reasonable, end-user friendly, *eula*(spla?) we then emailed to the companies, that would defend the consumers fundamental rights, to which the companies would agree to by allowing us to download or acquire and use their software from any official source? would that be legally sound?(at least as much as the regular kind of eula)

[IronyOwl]

Hell yes. You really should do more of these.

[Thexor]

what if we grouped together and wrote a perfectly reasonable, end-user friendly, *eula*(spla?) we then emailed to the companies, that would defend the consumers fundamental rights, to which the companies would agree to by allowing us to download or acquire and use their software from any official source? would that be legally sound?(at least as much as the regular kind of eula)

Of course it would be legally sound. We just have to prefix the email with "By reading the contents of this message, you agree to the terms of the licence contained within..." 

[Askot Bokbondeler]

i was more thinking along the lines of
"By allowing and providing the means for me to acquire a license of any of your software, you agree to the terms of the licence contained within..."

[IronyOwl]

i was more thinking along the lines of
"By allowing and providing the means for me to acquire a license of any of your software, you agree to the terms of the licence contained within..."

This is actually an interesting and hilarious premise, and I'm suddenly curious just how that stuff works.

[Askot Bokbondeler]

we need truean here

[Aklyon]

Ohai, EULA thread. This was an unexpected thing to see again. Are you still planning to do the facebook one eventually, Sensei?

[Sensei]

^{_{Because I can't sleep but feel like I'll make myself stay up too late if I play video games...}}
I'm back!

This will be a mini one! Today we're covering our beloved friend, Pando Media Booster!

Pando Media Booster is a torrent program licensed by various publishers, most prolifically Nexon, who provides games such as Maple Story, Combat Arms, blah blah blah I covered them in the last post. Its torrent format -that is, what you download is being uploaded by another user, not Nexon's servers- saves them a lot of money in download bandwidth for their games, which is important because those games are mostly free to play and attract a lot of users who don't pay.

The kicker is, of course, once you've finished downloading your game, Pando Media Booster stays on your computer. It seeds a torrent, without asking you, for games you've downloaded. That means that day and night, your computer is providing uploads of copies of the game you downloaded, using your bandwidth. Imagine if you were on a limited data plan for your main internet, or a plan that was limited during certain hours of the day? That's right, PMB will just keep on using up your bandwidth. Even if you have nothing so immediate, it's still guaranteed to slow your shit down no matter what you're doing.

Of course, the real reason that's heinous is because it doesn't really tell you. Obviously if you knew all that, you'd uninstall it, which by the way is your only means of shutting it off. So: Let's go through this EULA. Imagine, if you will, that you haven't read my dissertation or heard the same information anywhere else. Could you figure out what Pando Media Booster actually does?

Pando Media Booster EULA (link!)

First thing's first: Page format. Text is a medium shade of gray on a white background. That's not horrible, but to boot the text is really tiny. The natural result is a dizzying, painful, eye-straining block of text. You could maybe, if you wanted to play devil's advocate, excuse the tiny text as them wanting to fit the EULA into a small space. However, the text is ONLY gray on that page of the site, nowhere else- so, it's conclusive that they are actively trying to make it hard to read. Wait scratch that, upon pasting it into word it looks like the text is black, but it's so fucking small that the font makes it look gray. No seal of approval.

Before the actual EULA begins, there is the following block of text:

All Pando users must agree to an End User License Agreement and Terms of Use before installing Pando software. By installing the software you agree to abide by the terms in this agreement.

Yep. This is one of those EULAs where they don't even force you to look at the EULA- if you're downloading, say, Maple Story for example, you have to click on a link to read the EULA. Apparently you can agree to the terms without reading them. Pretty sure that's an instant-out for the entire text of a contract in the US and EU, should it come before a court. Note to self: Actually look up abusive contract law when not extremely tired.

PANDO NETWORKS, INC. SOFTWARE LICENSE AGREEMENT AND TERMS OF USE (PANDO MEDIA BOOSTER)
Because this EULA is blessedly short (only 3 pages in Word) much of the text is in this one section.

Initially it establishes that the "contract" (no longer "license agreement") is between You and Pando Networks.

If you do not agree with the terms and conditions of this Agreement, you may uninstall the software at any time.

At least it doesn't seem to saying that the agreement is permanent, like the other one.

Then it goes on to say that you have a personal, non-transferable right to use the software, which is nearly copy-paste stuff. Certainly would be odd that it's non-transferable. I guess that means in theory, you can't give PMB to someone who hasn't clicked "Install" or "Next" to agree automatically? It also includes documentation on the product they provide you, which is weird since that should definitely be available to someone who hadn't accepted the EULA. Your use is subject to following the terms of the agreement, etc etc...

Pando Networks reserves the right to modify or discontinue your access to any content, or to change the terms of use or any Pando Networks policies at any time with or without prior notice.

Once again of course, they can change the EULA on you without you so much as clicking "I Agree" again. If this actually held up in courts, they could basically change the EULA to say that you owe them a million dollars for using PMB. Which sounds silly but really- would you want to be bound by the terms of a contract that, if it involved an exchange of money, probably wouldn't be legal? But a lot of EULAs have this.

There's one more bit on not exporting the software to places the US won't export it to, and that it's not Pando Networks' fault if you do.

Usage

(a) You hereby grant permission for the Software to utilize the processor and bandwidth of your network connection for the limited purposes of facilitating the transfer of digital files and communication to users of the Software. (b) The Software shall be utilized to transfer those files published into Pando Networks' managed and secured network via approved partners.

So, the first part of this is them saying that they'll sap your processor and network. Which is funny, I don't think I've ever seen an EULA that makes you accept that a program could waste your processor cycles- usually they just go ahead and do it, since as far as I'm aware there isn't really a law against it anywhere. For the second clause: Who are "approved partners"? Are they other users? Are you transferring published files TO Pando's servers, or are you transferring files, which were published by Pando, through approved partners? I guess the latter makes the most sense; IE you're just sending files to yahoos.

Software Updates
This just says that they can update their software on your computer freely, like any other EULA. It does mention that they can gather hardware info on your computer, though- I can't imagine what they'd want that for other than knowing how much they can leverage your rig to do their work.

New Releases of the Software

You are not entitled to receive any new releases of the Software, or any updates, upgrades or similar products under the EULA, but Pando Networks may, in its sole discretion, offer any or all of the foregoing to you.

Rather than just leaving it unmentioned, they go out of their way to point out that they don't have to give you updates, if they don't want to.

Pando Networks may update, upgrade or otherwise enhance the Software at any time, in its sole discretion, without obligation or notification to you.

"...and we don't have to tell you, either!" Also presumably means they can update without warning you, which I'm sure they do. They certainly run the program at startup without warning you.

It lastly says that you might have to install an entirely new version periodically, and if you don't then you naturally won't have access to their network. With the interesting clause...

Pando Networks shall not be responsible in any way for your inability to access the System or download content, and you shall not be entitled to receive a refund of any fees or any other form of compensation.

I'm quite happy to have PMB stop wasting my bandwidth for free, actually.

Crash Reporting
Man, can you imagine what it might have been like to have a program like this run in your background and crash in the pre-XP days when it would BSOD your whole computer?

At Pando Networks’ discretion a sample of crashes in the PMB software may be reported to an automatic analysis system.

This seems to be the main thing actually related to crashes in this section.

It also says here that the "Copyright, trade secrets and other intellectual property rights" are strictly owned by Pando Networks or the third party whose software you're downloading through PMB.

Pando Networks retains all rights not expressly granted in this Agreement.

Which is funny, I don't think that they granted us hardly any, except the right for their program to grace our computers. And of course presumably this is related to copyright but still, when it's that vaguely worded one imagines things like "right to overclock your computer until it catches fire" might be included.

After this there's no more section headers, but it breaks into a warranty (or lack-of-warranty) section. Therein it says that the software is provided as-is, you assume "ALL RISKS", and Pando Networks isn't responsible for any unpleasant qualities in software provided through their platform.

[Pando] DISCLAIMS ALL WARRANTIES... INCLUDIN ... THE IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY AND FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE.

These implied warranties are normal avenues to demand a refund for something that can't be sold (has no merchantability) or doesn't work (has no fitness for a particular purpose which the vendor stated it has) such as rotten milk and a salt shaker with no holes respectively. PANDO NETWORKS RESERVES THE RIGHT TO SELL YOU ROTTEN MILK AND A SALT SHAKER WITH NO HOLES. Also, chalk this one up on the "Can they actually waive that?" list.

There's lastly a section on liability which is almost a carbon copy of the one in Maple Story. However, they're about five times as generous as Nexon. In the case that Pando Networks is required to compensate for damages:

...YOU AGREE THAT THE LIMIT OF PANDO NETWORK'S LIABILITY SHALL BE ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS.

Well, I guess it's better than twenty.

And that's all!
Now it's time for me to finally get to bed. For an extra challenge, read Pando's FAQ and take the "what does it actually do" challenge there too. Mostly, it seems like all I can find are sheepish admissions that they use your bandwidth.