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[Ivir_Baggins]

With the next update, instead of using turkeys, can't we use vampire were-turkeys?

[Broseph Stalin]

With the next update, instead of using turkeys, can't we use vampire were-turkeys?

Having your super soldiers turn into turkeys in the middle of a siege would be pretty awful.

[Girlinhat]

I'm looking for were-dwarfs.

Urist McDwarf has seen the full moon and become a WereDwarf.
Urist McWereDwarf cancels Store Owned Item: Drinking.

[BastiBasti]

No this isn't enough, we need more layers of creatures.

Urist has seen the full moon.
Urist has become a weredwarf-sceletonwhale-demon-dragon-titan-carp-badgerboar-turky.

That oughta get those gobbos.

[jcnorris00]

I decided to blow the dust off of my DF installation and do some ‼SCIENCE‼ of my own.  This is the first fort that I've founded for the sole purpose of doing ‼SCIENCE‼, so it's a new experience for me.  Usually it's "make a perfect fortress with some ‼SCIENCE‼ on the side" and the ‼SCIENCE‼ suffers.  The fort is messy and most industries are non-existent, but there's a dining room, good food and drink, and everyone has a bed room.  I've already captured some badgers (the first cage trap caught one before my mechanic could even finish building the second one, and all the materials were on site) and breeding is proceeding at a nice pace.  I decided to turn off invasions so that I won't have to bother with a military.

I've set up two daycare centers, each capable of holding four tots.  The first one is quite spartan; a 1x1 room full of badgers, a door, a standard-or-fine quality bed, a food stockpile, and the door to freedom.  Floors and walls are smoothed.  The second is more luxurious; a 1x2 room with a mist-shrouded statue and a pile of badgers, connected via door to a 2x2 room with bed, chair, table, and food stockpile, then a second door to freedom.  The floors and walls are engraved, and furnishings will be high quality.

I'm doing something a bit different with the tile where the badgers are.  It's actually a grate covering a 1x1 pond.  I intend to dump soap as well as badgers into the room.  Hopefully the tykes will voluntarily clean themselves up occasionally (unlike my own children), reducing the risk of infection.  We shall see.

The odd thing is that I've had at least six migrant waves so far, but not a single child.  I was hoping to use immigrant children to get the benefit of protective clothing, but I guess the parents at the mountainhome know that something's up.  I do have to native babies, though, so once they're old enough, I'll isolate them in the spartan day care rooms.

The lack of children has given me time to try selectively breeding the badgers.  I've got a couple of females that are gigantic but incredibly weak, and I'm breeding for those traits.  I suppose small or skinny would be better than gigantic, at least as far as the dwarven subjects' health goes, but I have to work with what I've got.

[Particleman]

Girlinhat, you have a horrible, twisted mind, and this thread is horrifying and the dwarfiest thing I have ever seen, and I cannot express how much I love you for it.

[Girlinhat]

I would like to take all the credit, but I must admit that the community at large has contributed greatly to the depravity we indulge in here.  If not for the support of so me sociopathic security risks, this thread, and the collective sanity of everyone who has read it, wouldn't be the same.

I do still take most of the credit, just not all.  Modesty has never been my strong suit, but then again I never claimed it was.  I'm rather hoping this ends up as iconic as mermaid farming.

[BastiBasti]

I've set up two daycare centers, each capable of holding four tots.  The first one is quite spartan; a 1x1 room full of badgers, a door, a standard-or-fine quality bed, a food stockpile, and the door to freedom.  Floors and walls are smoothed.  The second is more luxurious; a 1x2 room with a mist-shrouded statue and a pile of badgers, connected via door to a 2x2 room with bed, chair, table, and food stockpile, then a second door to freedom.  The floors and walls are engraved, and furnishings will be high quality.

1X2 rooms! this is an outrage! I even think 1x1 rooms are a bit too large! I home your ashemed of yourself.

[jcnorris00]

1X2 rooms! this is an outrage! I even think 1x1 rooms are a bit too large! I home your ashemed of yourself.

In my defense, one of the spaces is taken up by the statue, so there's only one space for the child and badgers to share.

[BastiBasti]

1X2 rooms! this is an outrage! I even think 1x1 rooms are a bit too large! I home your ashemed of yourself.

In my defense, one of the spaces is taken up by the statue, so there's only one space for the child and badgers to share.

Is it a statue of something horrible? Do masons and engraves engrave more horrible things is they see them? I think its time for !!SCIENCE!!....

[Broseph Stalin]

I would like to take all the credit, but I must admit that the community at large has contributed greatly to the depravity we indulge in here.  If not for the support of so me sociopathic security risks, this thread, and the collective sanity of everyone who has read it, wouldn't be the same.

I do still take most of the credit, just not all.  Modesty has never been my strong suit, but then again I never claimed it was.  I'm rather hoping this ends up as iconic as mermaid farming.

I've been thinking about this particular subject, if the test of Dorfiness is depravity plus awesomeness minus usefulness minus practicality then Dwarven Childcare may be more dorfy. Mermaid farming wins in impracticality, the methods were much more convoluted but I'd say Childcare wins in awesomeness. Depravity is a toss up because on one hand mermaid farming was crueler but Childcare is inflicted upon ones own kind. The deciding factor must then be which is the least useful? Mermaid farming could provide valuable crafts to offer traders which is worthwhile but a developed fort usually has enough garbage to buy an entire caravan, Dwarven Childcare has the potential to create an army of darkness perfectly optimized to have the personality, social station, and skills to wipe out entire sieges. Childcare is obviously more useful on paper but so far it hasn't worked, if that trend continues then Childcare has absolutely no purpose but getting children out of the way until they're old enough to be useful. That means if Mermaid Farming was ever done successfully it is by default more useful than Childcare and therefore less dorfy. If someone has ever successfully farmed mermaids I would posit that Dwarven Childcare is the Dorfiest thing ever.

[Elifre]

No this isn't enough, we need more layers of creatures.

Urist has seen the full moon.
Urist has become a weredwarf-sceletonwhale-demon-dragon-titan-carp-badgerboar-turky.

That oughta get those gobbos.

You left out elephant. Have you forgotten Boatmurdered?

[jcnorris00]

Real life and Civilization V (Steam had a sale) are interfering with dwarf ‼SCIENCE‼, but the day care rooms are now completely set up.  Two of the local babies grew to children, and so I resigned myself to testing with naked subjects.  I had isolated them, one in the spartan room and one in the opulent room, and just before I started dumping in the badgers, another wave of immigrants showed up with two kids.  The nudists have won a reprieve.  More to come.

[wierd]

Excellent.  Now you can construct identical chambers without the badgers.

This will function as the control group to determine if savagery from wild animals builds niechean resistances, or merely increases child mortality.

[kaian-a-coel]

I heard dumping?
Maybe you should control the badgers' (or whatever, dogs, turkeys and so on) dumping height so that they end up in the cell wounded, just enough to be a worthy challenge but less mortal?
waddya think?