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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 663024 times)

TheDarkStar

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #750 on: August 03, 2014, 09:26:23 pm »

A farmer gathers an engineer, a mathematician, and a physicist to make the largest field with the least fence.

Engineer (after taking some fence and making a circle): "There! That is the most efficient shape."
Physicist (after taking some fence and making a line): "Obviously, the largest possible field takes a fence that goes all the way around the world."
Mathematician (after constructing a tiny fence around himself): "I am on the outside."
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Mr. Strange

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #751 on: August 03, 2014, 09:29:14 pm »

A farmer gathers an engineer, a mathematician, and a physicist to make the largest field with the least fence.

Engineer (after taking some fence and making a circle): "There! That is the most efficient shape."
Physicist (after taking some fence and making a line): "Obviously, the largest possible field takes a fence that goes all the way around the world."
Mathematician (after constructing a tiny fence around himself): "I am on the outside."
* Strange takes singe fence pole and sits on it
There, everything else is the field.
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Orange Wizard

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #752 on: August 03, 2014, 10:04:13 pm »

Mathematician/scientist/engineer jokes? There's one I can't really remember... it was about proving that all odd numbers are primes... that might have been this thread, actually...
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Worldmaster27

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #753 on: August 03, 2014, 10:30:23 pm »

I do recall one being about that.
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Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #754 on: August 04, 2014, 02:33:56 am »

Mathematician/scientist/engineer jokes? There's one I can't really remember... it was about proving that all odd numbers are primes... that might have been this thread, actually...

There was indeed one like that on this thread.
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McDonald

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #755 on: August 04, 2014, 05:49:31 am »

Two chemists walk into a bar. One says "H2O, please" and the second says "H2O too, please". They start drinking and the second chemist dies.
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KingofstarrySkies

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #756 on: August 04, 2014, 05:59:23 am »

A gymnast walks into a bar. She gets a three point reduction, thereby ruining her chances of bringing home the trophy.
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The Darkling Wolf

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #757 on: August 04, 2014, 07:25:26 am »

Two chemists walk into a bar. One says "H2O, please" and the second says "I'll have a glass of water please, I have no idea why my colleague here ordered in such a bizarre method, it's weird". They start drinking and the first chemist fumes over the fact that his assassination plan has failed.
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Comrade P.

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #758 on: August 04, 2014, 04:45:39 pm »

knock, knock
"Who is there?"
"Dave."
"Dave who?"
Dave began to cry when he realized his grandmother's Alzheimers had progressed to the stage where she no longer recognized her only grandson.

 - That one terrible German man who made the whole Europe forget everything they knew before...
 - Hitler?
 - Alzheimer.
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Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #759 on: August 05, 2014, 06:22:51 pm »

A man is plagued by chronic flatulence wih the unusual idiosynchrosy that every time he passes wind it souds like the the name of the famous automobile manufacturer "Honda". He talks to several proctologists and gastroenterologists about this problem but none of them are able to figure it out. Finally, one day, he happens to mention it to a friend of his who is a dentist, who immediately replies that he must have an abscessed tooth.
"I don't understand" says the man
"Well," says the dentist, "Everyone knows that 'abscess makes the fart go 'honda''"
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crazysheep

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #760 on: August 05, 2014, 09:50:00 pm »

*cringe*

well played..? :3
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Rose

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #761 on: August 05, 2014, 10:11:33 pm »

I don't get it?
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Lyeos

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #762 on: August 05, 2014, 10:12:04 pm »

I don't get it?
You know...
Absence makes the heart grow fonder?
That last sentence?
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Take a closer look at this text!

Rose

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #763 on: August 05, 2014, 11:15:02 pm »

Oooohhh....

I guess I wasn't familiar enough with the saying to get it.
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Morrigi

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #764 on: August 06, 2014, 12:10:07 am »

Quote
I just heard some guy tell two terrible Malaysian Airlines jokes. The first one got no response, and the second one went down in flames.
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