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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 662914 times)

Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1830 on: February 28, 2015, 11:38:48 pm »
Q.) Why is grammar like the gastrointestinal tract?
A.) They both have colons
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crazysheep

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1831 on: March 01, 2015, 12:17:30 am »
Quote from: Bohandas on February 28, 2015, 11:38:48 pm
Q.) Why is grammar like the gastrointestinal tract?
A.) They both have colons
10/10 would giggle again, was not terrible :P
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Dorfs R Fun

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1832 on: March 02, 2015, 06:56:33 pm »
*arms terrible joke launcher, aims, fires.

What did the sheep say to the ship sailing stalwartly towards the sunset?
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origamiscienceguy

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1833 on: March 02, 2015, 10:27:58 pm »
What do you call a dog with no legs?

Anything you want, it's not coming to you either way!

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Right where you left it!
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"'...It represents the world. They [the dwarves] plan to destroy it.' 'WITH SOAP?!'" -legend of zoro (with some strange interperetation)

Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1834 on: March 02, 2015, 10:35:32 pm »
Q.) What do you call a woman with one leg?
A.) Eileen

Q.) What do you call an asian-american woman with one leg?
A.) Irene
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pisskop

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1835 on: March 02, 2015, 10:38:23 pm »
heh.
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Tack

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1836 on: March 02, 2015, 10:41:15 pm »
Quote from: Bohandas on March 02, 2015, 10:35:32 pm
Q.) What do you call a woman with one leg?
A.) Eileen

Q.) What do you call an asian-american woman with one leg?
A.) Irene
What do you call a woman with no legs?
Stumped.
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Quote from: MetalSlimeHunt on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
Sentience, Endurance, and Thumbs: The Trifector of a Superpredator.
Quote from: ToadyOne on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
Yeah, he's a banned spammer. Normally we'd delete this thread too, but people were having too much fun with it by the time we got here.

Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1837 on: March 03, 2015, 02:13:51 am »
Q.) What's a good name for a Chinese porn star?
A.) Long Wang.
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Dorfs R Fun

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1838 on: March 03, 2015, 02:22:22 am »
These are probably already known but...

Q)What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the water?
A)Bob

Q)What do call a guy with no arms and no legs lying on the floor?
A)Matt

Q)What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs lying in the bathroom?
A)John
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Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1839 on: March 03, 2015, 02:26:49 am »
Q.) How is Malaysian Airlines like the Windows operating system?
A.) They both crash frequently
« Last Edit: March 03, 2015, 02:29:52 am by Bohandas »
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Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1840 on: March 03, 2015, 02:32:13 am »
Those are all pretty funny but I think there's some duplicates in there

Nevermind, it got deleted.
« Last Edit: March 03, 2015, 03:18:09 am by Bohandas »
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Akura

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1841 on: March 03, 2015, 09:04:21 am »
A police officer lost his job after looking for his car keys, during which he began convulsing violently.

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They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I told them I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard.
Quote from: Vector on March 17, 2011, 11:50:36 pm
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origamiscienceguy

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1842 on: March 03, 2015, 09:57:16 am »
I was walking around the city yesterday, and I saw a building advertising a fortune teller. I decided to try it out. When I entered, I was surprised at how short the fortune teller was, but I still asked to get my fortune told. Suddenly, many police officers ran into the building and the fortune teller suddenly vanished.

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"'...It represents the world. They [the dwarves] plan to destroy it.' 'WITH SOAP?!'" -legend of zoro (with some strange interperetation)

SaberToothTiger

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1843 on: March 03, 2015, 11:24:48 am »
Soviet Russia.



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Quote from: MaximumZero on June 14, 2014, 11:01:53 pm
Quote from: Yoink on June 14, 2014, 10:54:23 pm
I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

Helgoland

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #1844 on: March 03, 2015, 11:36:05 am »
I know the last one as:
3) Pushkin, deep in thought.
2) Pushkin, gazing up at the stars.
1) Stalin, reading a book by Pushkin.
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Arguably he's already a progressive, just one in the style of an enlightened Kaiser.
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