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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 662920 times)

Akura

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2370 on: July 20, 2015, 10:13:23 am »
Quote from: Tack on July 18, 2015, 12:50:23 pm
Edit: Daemons - They discorporeate upon death. Doesn't make it any less funny. Change it to a Dark-Eldar Wych.

Who said they killed her? They just cut her up for meat, she didn't necessarily die from that.
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They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I told them I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard.
Quote from: Vector on March 17, 2011, 11:50:36 pm
... Yes, the hugs are for everyone.  No stabbing, though.  Just hugs.

Eric Blank

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2371 on: July 20, 2015, 10:24:20 am »
That's debatably a worse fate. But the needs of the many outweigh the meaty goodness of the few, right?
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I make Spellcrafts!
Quote from: Andreus on June 09, 2011, 02:07:07 pm
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

scrdest

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2372 on: July 20, 2015, 01:25:45 pm »
Quote from: Eric Blank on July 20, 2015, 10:24:20 am
That's debatably a worse fate. But the meats of the many outweigh the meats of the few, right?
FTFY
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Quote from: Akura on April 17, 2016, 12:06:46 pm
We are doomed. It's just that whatever is going to kill us all just happens to be, from a scientific standpoint, pretty frickin' awesome.

Rubidium

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2373 on: July 21, 2015, 03:17:51 pm »
Why did the chicken cross the road?


So that the chicken could...cross the road!
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Tack

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2374 on: July 21, 2015, 03:29:16 pm »
Here's an original.

Two Vikings are out at sea on a longboat. One turns to the other and says:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Quote from: MetalSlimeHunt on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
Sentience, Endurance, and Thumbs: The Trifector of a Superpredator.
Quote from: ToadyOne on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
Yeah, he's a banned spammer. Normally we'd delete this thread too, but people were having too much fun with it by the time we got here.

Descan

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2375 on: July 21, 2015, 07:23:18 pm »
I resemble resent this slight against my people.
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Quote from: SalmonGod
Your innocent viking escapades for canadian social justice and immortality make my flagellum wiggle, too.
Quote from: Myroc
Descan confirmed for antichrist.
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I wonder if any of us don't love Descan.

Urist McScoopbeard

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2376 on: July 22, 2015, 05:40:31 am »
Tacky.
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Quote from: Max™ on July 20, 2016, 06:17:12 pm
This conversation is getting disturbing fast, disturbingly erotic.

Generally me

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2377 on: July 22, 2015, 12:57:45 pm »
Quote from: Descan on July 21, 2015, 07:23:18 pm
I resemble resent this slight against my people.
So does your MOM!

ooooooh, sick burn.
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Tack

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2378 on: July 22, 2015, 01:24:01 pm »
Quote from: Urist McScoopbeard on July 22, 2015, 05:40:31 am
Tacky.
Oh. Dang. Would 'What were we drinking last night' be better?
I thought it was a decent one.
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Quote from: MetalSlimeHunt on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
Sentience, Endurance, and Thumbs: The Trifector of a Superpredator.
Quote from: ToadyOne on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
Yeah, he's a banned spammer. Normally we'd delete this thread too, but people were having too much fun with it by the time we got here.

Kadzar

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2379 on: July 26, 2015, 11:04:23 pm »
Quote from: Tack on July 21, 2015, 03:29:16 pm
Here's an original.

Two Vikings are out at sea on a longboat. One turns to the other and says:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
There's probably no way to incorporate it into the joke, but I find it slightly funnier to imagine these are Minnesota Vikings.
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Quote from: Urist McScoopbeard on March 20, 2015, 10:01:25 pm
What if the earth is just a knick in one of the infinite swords of the mighty fractal bear?
Glory to Arstotzka!

UXLZ

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2380 on: July 26, 2015, 11:57:41 pm »
How many babies go into the blender?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Ahhh~ She looked into your eyes,
And saw what laid beneath,
Don't try to save yourself,
The circle is complete.

Tack

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2381 on: July 27, 2015, 01:24:55 am »
Quote from: Kadzar on July 26, 2015, 11:04:23 pm
Quote from: Tack on July 21, 2015, 03:29:16 pm
Here's an original.

Two Vikings are out at sea on a longboat. One turns to the other and says:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
There's probably no way to incorporate it into the joke, but I find it slightly funnier to imagine these are Minnesota Vikings.
That would make it even funnier.

The original intention of the joke was that they weren't actually vikings. They just got messed up one night and woke up the next morning in full attire in a longboat.
But I'm not sure how to transfer all of that into a two-liner.


The difference between kinky and perverted?
Kinky is using a feather during sex.
Perverted is using the whole chicken.
« Last Edit: July 28, 2015, 08:50:47 am by Tack »
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Quote from: MetalSlimeHunt on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
Sentience, Endurance, and Thumbs: The Trifector of a Superpredator.
Quote from: ToadyOne on December 31, 1969, 07:00:01 pm
Yeah, he's a banned spammer. Normally we'd delete this thread too, but people were having too much fun with it by the time we got here.

Eric Blank

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2382 on: July 28, 2015, 10:49:41 am »
Why was the melon sad while with the girl?

Because he cantaloupe when she's eating him.
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I make Spellcrafts!
Quote from: Andreus on June 09, 2011, 02:07:07 pm
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Bumber

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2383 on: July 28, 2015, 08:54:07 pm »
April showers bring May flowers. What do May flowers bring?

Allergy season.
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Quote from: Ispil on August 30, 2018, 01:17:08 pm
Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

Bohandas

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #2384 on: July 28, 2015, 11:53:08 pm »
All the male bees are refusing to work. It's a drone strike.
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