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Author Topic: Terrible Suggestions Thread  (Read 490364 times)

Mobbstar

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3780 on: October 03, 2021, 01:06:58 pm »

The dwarf Urist Emuthidek The Flying Murder has come!  A dwarf of prey so large and ferocious it dwarfs many dwarves.  All beneath its mighty dwarves should fear the dwarf.

ChaosPotato

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3781 on: October 03, 2021, 04:10:30 pm »

Atoms are tiny dwarves. Which are made of even smaller dwarf-atoms. This goes on and on forever and makes the game completely impossible to run.
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hi I hate this account and everything I've ever done with it but I don't feel like going through the process of making a new one right now

Starver

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3782 on: October 03, 2021, 04:28:57 pm »

"Fort dwarves have little dwarves upon their backs to mine 'em, And little dwarves have lesser dwarves, and so ad infinitum. And the fort dwarves themselves, in turn, have greater dwarves to bore; While these again have greater still, and greater still, and more..."

(I'm sure I actually did this before, in some form or other.)
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PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3783 on: October 03, 2021, 06:18:48 pm »

The forgotten dwarf Bomrek the Dwarf-Forsaken Dwarf of Dwarves has come. A gigantic three-dwarfed dwarf twisted into dwarf form with external dwarves. Its dwarf-colored dwarves are jagged and set far apart. Beware its deadly dwarves!
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

A_Curious_Cat

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3784 on: October 04, 2021, 01:00:59 am »

Out of curiosity, will the dwarves get mad and leave (possibly returning with a siege), if you trade dwarves to them?
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King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3785 on: October 04, 2021, 02:19:43 am »

You have struck Dwarves! Praise the miners!
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

rico6822

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3786 on: October 04, 2021, 10:31:00 am »

Dwarf Fortress gets reworked to contain "surreal mode" that causes the game to be cursed to the desires of this thread.'

Also vibing is now an emotion.

Blood men now possess extraordinary combat skills and are considered to be the personal servants of Armok.

Clowns with low kill counters are forcefully namek Bomrek in order to encourage them into doing killing sprees. Not killing enough creatures daily causes name to return.

Bat men are great inventors who pursue criminals as a hobby in fancy suits. They are programmed to be 5 times more likely for it.

The game is now a metroidvania with extremely buggy level generator.

When high five gets introduced dwarves with cut hands can do this too as a bug to fix.

In respect to the poor NPC going to the gallows in future update they will always be instakilled even if the drop was short for neck snapping reasons. Additionally a bug makes NPC not being updated to be dressed properly for the execution and they can get hanged naked. Technically you can kill that way even vampiress (or vampire) who don't need to breathe.

Male characters with genitalia intact can suffer from death erection if they suffocate and it sometimes happens if they get killed with headshots too.

Female characters also piss as result of death by suffocation.
« Last Edit: October 04, 2021, 10:49:55 am by rico6822 »
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Does anybody know how to become an elephant man in adventure mode? I literally did all advanced world settings possible to increase chances.

Mobbstar

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3787 on: October 04, 2021, 12:25:41 pm »

When high five gets introduced dwarves with cut hands can do this too as a bug to fix.

Militia dwarves will celebrate the death of a forgotten beast by high-fiving each other, as well as all their family and close friends.

A_Curious_Cat

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3788 on: October 04, 2021, 07:54:39 pm »

The militia-dwarf high-fives the thresher in the right hand, bruising the skin and fracturing the bone.
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PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3789 on: October 04, 2021, 08:07:52 pm »

Out of curiosity, will the dwarves get mad and leave (possibly returning with a siege), if you trade dwarves to them?

Absolutely.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

Eric Blank

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3790 on: October 04, 2021, 08:55:50 pm »

Myth and magic update; like necromancers, extremely depressed hist figs will seek out the gods to rid them of their condition. Sometimes they will say "I don't want to live in this world any more" and vindictive gods might kill them or even annihilate their souls entirely.

This causes nemesis unit load errors because the game can't access a hist fig file that is no longer there
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3791 on: October 05, 2021, 01:38:47 am »

Some times a random god can appear in your fort or in front of your adventurer and kick nearby creatures in the nuts then disappear before they can retaliate.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3792 on: October 05, 2021, 01:55:32 am »

A god will occasionally make its voice audible to a select dwarf just to say one of several randomly-selected words (such as "cat", "bin", "wheelbarrow", "blood", and "fungus"). It never happens to the same dwarf more than once, and as a result that dwarf can never be sure if they ever actually heard the word at all or who said it if they did.
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

Mobbstar

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3793 on: October 05, 2021, 06:56:08 am »

When gods want to curse somebody only very slightly, they tie a knot into the victims headphones.

Bumber

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #3794 on: October 05, 2021, 07:05:01 am »

Militia dwarves will celebrate the death of a forgotten beast by high-fiving each other, as well as all their family and close friends.

Replace all FB syndromes with one that just causes the infected to high-five everyone they see.
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?
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