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Author Topic: What Would Urist Do?  (Read 649866 times)

Blastbeard

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5985 on: May 25, 2014, 06:23:59 pm »
"Hi everybody, my name is Urist and welcome to Let's Play Dwarf Fortress. If you were watching last time, you  know I just finished pulling the cats out of the well and-- Oh, Megabeast attack. This should be good, I -- OH MY GOD THAT HYDRA DOESN'T HAVE ANY SKIN!! RRAAAGHBLBBL*Ded*"
WWUD if he was the only person who could pilot the super prototype giant death robot and defend the fortress against hordes of crappier giant death robots?
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I don't know how it all works, I just throw molten science at the wall and see what ignites.

WoobMonkey

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5986 on: May 25, 2014, 06:29:34 pm »
'Ho hum, I should probably get to piloting the GDR.  Well, sure can't do it SOBER - better get me a drink, first.  Plenty of time, plenty of time.  Hmmm... it's a long hike to the controls; I should eat something, too, to shore up my energy reserves.  Boy, do I love these tallow roasts, but they're sooo heavy.  Maybe a little nap wouldn't hurt - I'd hate to pull the wrong lever out of fatigue, after all!'

Your settlement has been utterly destroyed.

WWUD if invited to give a TED talk?
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Edangzak Utharsanad Gedor - think you have what it takes?
CharmCrafted

Quote from: ☼!!Troll Fur Sock!!☼ on November 26, 2013, 09:47:09 am
The dog misses the ball!
The ball softly hits Urist McTrainer in the head, breaking the paper-thin skull and denting the non-existent brain!

Playergamer

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5987 on: June 15, 2014, 12:49:36 pm »
Introduce the Pressurized Magma Cannon.

WWED if he was Randall Munroe for a day?
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Quote from: KingofstarrySkies on June 30, 1974, 05:00:37 am
A troll, most likely...But I hate not feeding the animals. Let the games begin.
Ya fuckin' wanker.   

My sigtext

TD1

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5988 on: June 15, 2014, 02:21:16 pm »
Become Batman by night.

WWUD if he was called Erist?
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Life before death, strength before weakness, journey before destination
Quote from: TalonisWolf on March 29, 2014, 09:12:55 pm
  TD1 has claimed the title of Penblessed the Endless Fountain of Epics!
Sigtext!
Poetry Thread

sal880612m

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5989 on: June 15, 2014, 02:31:56 pm »
Realize his name was meant to be Errist and make even more dumb bone headed fort destroying errors than he already does.

WWUD if he had a lightsaber?
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Quote from: Dirst on July 03, 2014, 12:23:30 pm
"I was chopping off little bits of 'im till he talked, startin' at the toes."
"You probably should have stopped sometime before his eyes."

Eric Blank

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5990 on: June 15, 2014, 07:15:56 pm »
Cut everybody's limbs off. None of them bleed to death so he has to take care of a fortress full of cripples.

Wwud if she were left alone in the wilds for the night?
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I make Spellcrafts!
Quote from: Andreus on June 09, 2011, 02:07:07 pm
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

sal880612m

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5991 on: June 15, 2014, 07:44:52 pm »
Hear cackling.

WWUD if abandoned in the wilderness as child and survived.
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Quote from: Dirst on July 03, 2014, 12:23:30 pm
"I was chopping off little bits of 'im till he talked, startin' at the toes."
"You probably should have stopped sometime before his eyes."

Tawa

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5992 on: June 15, 2014, 08:52:49 pm »
Found R☺me.

WWUD if he was raised by wolves?
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I don't use Bay12 much anymore. PM me if you need to get in touch with me and I'll send you my Discord handle.

klefenz

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5993 on: June 15, 2014, 11:29:49 pm »
Walk very slow

WWUD if she was sent to a mining expedition on a planet made of frozen ethanol?
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Baffler

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5994 on: June 16, 2014, 10:37:25 pm »
Mine ethanol without incident, compressing it in space before sending it back to The Endless Universes. The entire planet is destroyed in an instant, and Urist with it, when he opens a canister of magma is imported from the Mountainhomes.

WWUD if he knew that his planet's star would burn out in exactly 426 years, 7 months, 2 weeks, 4 days, 6 hours, 56 minutes, and 23 seconds?
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Quote from: Helgoland
Even if you found a suitable opening, I doubt it would prove all too satisfying. And it might leave some nasty wounds, depending on the moral high ground's geology.
Location subject to periodic change.
Baffler likes silver, walnut trees, the color green, tanzanite, and dogs for their loyalty. When possible he prefers to consume beef, iced tea, and cornbread. He absolutely detests ticks.

ELF-rhymer

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5995 on: June 16, 2014, 11:58:19 pm »
Go deeper and kick the hell out of Clowns to create a fortress in the Circus, where it will be warm enough.

WWUD if he sees an elephant?
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"So the merchants arrive to see blood and vomit everywhere, us hauling corpses en masse to the graveyard, a couple rampaging elephants

WELCOME TO FUCKING BOATMURDERED!"

DwarfFortress Boatmurdered.
Part 17 by StarkRavingMad.

Eric Blank

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5996 on: June 17, 2014, 12:07:54 am »
Fucking RUN. And be trampled into paste.

Wwud without his wonderful new masterwork chair?
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I make Spellcrafts!
Quote from: Andreus on June 09, 2011, 02:07:07 pm
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

klefenz

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5997 on: June 17, 2014, 09:43:46 am »
Quote from: Eric Blank on June 17, 2014, 12:07:54 am
Fucking RUN. And be trampled into paste.

Wwud without his wonderful new masterwork chair?

Fall to the ground.

WWUD if her baby shield fell down the waste compactor chute?
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mate888

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5998 on: June 17, 2014, 03:29:03 pm »
Use the kobold she was figthing as a new shield to figth all the other mosnstrosities that were invading the fort.
WWUD if her shield was a living kobold squeaking in terror?
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Quote from: Taupe on March 17, 2016, 01:43:01 pm
My second turn's unnoficial goal was to turn everyone into vampires, and it backfired so bad, I ended up making the fort a more efficient, safer and friendlier place.
Quote from: Cathar on May 09, 2017, 06:22:31 pm
Apparently they evolved a taste for everything I love and care about

Jiharo

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #5999 on: June 17, 2014, 05:07:45 pm »
Adopt him as a pet.
What would kobold do if he were adopted by your average deranged dwarf?
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Quote from: zwei on May 13, 2011, 01:49:14 am
Quote from: PTTG?? on May 13, 2011, 01:46:06 am
All your goblin bone bolts, suddenly rising up in vengeance...
I wonder ... is it smart amunition or dumb amunition?
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