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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1008578 times)

scriver

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11115 on: March 04, 2021, 03:13:53 pm »

Knife has been the only thing I've heard so far. There could be a measure of police lingo involved because the police has a style of referring to anything sharp as "knife" in descriptions, even if it were to be a say machete or sword.

I just heard this being talked about on SvT news and the reporter said he's not heard anything about it "being a longer knife". So apparently there seem to be some discussion about it.

Also, I've realised that there was only seven victims (and I think all of them are alive). The eighth hospitalised person was the perpetrator himself (he was neutralised by a shot to leg).
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11116 on: March 08, 2021, 05:23:25 am »

Knife has been the only thing I've heard so far. There could be a measure of police lingo involved because the police has a style of referring to anything sharp as "knife" in descriptions, even if it were to be a say machete or sword.

I just heard this being talked about on SvT news and the reporter said he's not heard anything about it "being a longer knife". So apparently there seem to be some discussion about it.

Also, I've realised that there was only seven victims (and I think all of them are alive). The eighth hospitalised person was the perpetrator himself (he was neutralised by a shot to leg).
Impressive if they managed to save everyone

In other news, EU caught in another fishing row and necolonialism row, this time instead of West African states or Somalia, now with Maldives, Sri Lanka and Kenya

Same problem really. EU fishing fleets using unsustainable practices in unsustainable quantities, depleting the stocks before moving onto the next waters. Once the Maldives, Sri Lanka and Kenya are succed dry we'll see in 5 years time Myanmar, Malaysia and Indonesia accusing the EU fisheries of neocolonialism. That is unless the Chinese fleets in South America don't make it a race to see who can overfish the most the fastest

Iduno

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11117 on: March 08, 2021, 10:42:17 am »

Knife has been the only thing I've heard so far. There could be a measure of police lingo involved because the police has a style of referring to anything sharp as "knife" in descriptions, even if it were to be a say machete or sword.

I just heard this being talked about on SvT news and the reporter said he's not heard anything about it "being a longer knife". So apparently there seem to be some discussion about it.

Also, I've realised that there was only seven victims (and I think all of them are alive). The eighth hospitalised person was the perpetrator himself (he was neutralised by a shot to leg).
Impressive if they managed to save everyone

In other news, EU caught in another fishing row and necolonialism row, this time instead of West African states or Somalia, now with Maldives, Sri Lanka and Kenya

Same problem really. EU fishing fleets using unsustainable practices in unsustainable quantities, depleting the stocks before moving onto the next waters. Once the Maldives, Sri Lanka and Kenya are succed dry we'll see in 5 years time Myanmar, Malaysia and Indonesia accusing the EU fisheries of neocolonialism. That is unless the Chinese fleets in South America don't make it a race to see who can overfish the most the fastest

Surprised we'd be willing to fish there, with all of the toxic wastes we've been dumping there for decades. I guess the problem with unsustainable fishing is that you have to keep going to the only places left with fish.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11118 on: March 08, 2021, 11:04:21 am »

Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realize we cannot eat money.
We'll have to start eating people at some point.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Iduno

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11119 on: March 08, 2021, 04:11:03 pm »

Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realize we cannot eat money.
We'll have to start eating people at some point.

...start?
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11120 on: March 08, 2021, 06:18:03 pm »

Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realize we cannot eat money.
We'll have to start eating people at some point.
Invent edible bitcoin

Kagus

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11121 on: March 08, 2021, 06:21:48 pm »

Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realize we cannot eat money.
We'll have to start eating people at some point.
Invent edible bitcoin
Bitecoin™

dragdeler

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11122 on: March 08, 2021, 06:40:40 pm »

-
« Last Edit: September 16, 2023, 01:55:37 pm by dragdeler »
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hops

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11123 on: March 09, 2021, 01:33:41 am »

why can't we have edible money anyways
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MonkeyHead

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11124 on: March 09, 2021, 02:56:27 am »

why can't we have edible money anyways

Inflation would lead to obesity.
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Ziusudra

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11125 on: March 09, 2021, 05:36:45 am »

why can't we have edible money anyways
Inflation would lead to obesity.
But, then people eating it would reduce the supply and offset the inflation. It'd be a self regulating system.
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ChairmanPoo

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11126 on: March 09, 2021, 05:48:10 am »

Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realize we cannot eat money.
We'll have to start eating people at some point.
Invent edible bitcoin
Reintroduce the rice standard for money
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11127 on: March 09, 2021, 06:48:31 am »

Heh, my government now has the plan to have people who enter the country by car get a mandatory corona test.  This is already the case for air and sea travellers.


I wonder how they are going to enforce that.. Do they have a secret time machine to bring us back 40 years to a time before Schengen, when we still had border controls?
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11128 on: March 09, 2021, 07:00:31 am »

Belgian police reports that they managed to hack encrypted messenger SKY ECC, an encrypted medium loved and used a lot by criminal organisations. They already managed to hack it two years ago, and have been using their access to build cases against crime syndicates.

This morning around 5am, Belgian police raided more than 200 locations that are suspected to be involved in organised crime, the largest police operation in the history of the country.

A few years ago, a joint team of French and Dutch police already managed to break the encryption of EncroChat, which also resulted in the arrest of many criminals.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

dragdeler

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #11129 on: March 09, 2021, 07:11:09 am »

-
« Last Edit: September 16, 2023, 01:55:27 pm by dragdeler »
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