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[Resmisal]

Kek was a deity that occured in the myths of The Desert Empire. Kek was most often depicted as a green frog and is associated with chaos, darkness, oceans, and painting. He smiles smugly when he is not screaming.

[EuchreJack]

Replace all frogs with dwarves

[brewer bob]

Replace all frogs with dwarves

"Some dwarves like green tree dwarves for their distinct mating call."

[Salmeuk]

capture and train wild elephants not for war, but for employment in the kitchens

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

any cartoon whose employment invites a hundred naysayers trying to claw back some original, unspoiled meaning is questionable at best. also I totally called that one thread getting locked

[King Zultan]

Elephants are made to be afraid of everything smaller then them, which includes their own babies.

[A_Curious_Cat]

Everything is made to be afraid of everything smaller then it, which includes it’s own babies.

[TurboDwarf]

Implement individually tracked microbes and other single celled organisms. So everything can be perpetually afraid and running around in a panic... In addition to making the game run at one frame per year.

[jipehog]

Be ware of the mighty water bears!!  luckily even the most resistant creature we know will not survive lava

[A_Curious_Cat]

Forgotten beasts in in the shape of bears that are made out of water are immune to magma.

[brewer bob]

Forgotten beasts in the shape of Care Bears that have procedurally generated tummy symbols.

If many of these FBs come together they can do a 'Forgotten Beast Stare' power move and shoot radiant light at dwarves from their tummies. It is the ultimate weapon and nothing can be done to stop its effects.

[King Zultan]

Anytime something happens in your fortress that isn't something care bears would approve of they will attack as a massive horde of thousands of care bears.

[jipehog]

We need a clown car to ferry around the hug and tug show, would be grand to see them embark, just don't take an uber with IT.

[BeefotronX]

Add tooth fairies that can take teeth from stockpiles and leave silver trinkets.
This might seem nice but eventually they offer to take dwarves' teeth directly.
Then the Toe Collector comes.

[Eric Blank]

Worse, tooth pixies will spread teeth across the map, just thousands of teeth every season. Everywhere.

[brewer bob]

Worse, tooth pixies will spread teeth across the map, just thousands of teeth every season. Everywhere.

And these are forbidden (and can't be claimed by the player) until a dwarf claims them as their own and stores them in their room.